I understand that people are willing to give any input that might help, so in order to clarify what the problem is about, as I have experienced it myself, and as I percieved is similar to the original poster's experience, here is my description of the problem:
First of all; to all non sufferers of this kind of sexual anhedonia, it's pretty hard to understand exactly what it feels like.
Of course, there are some anxiety related to the condition, but it's not about interrelational problems. Usually the anxiety is about being unable to form an emotional connection (erotic or romantic) to a partner because of the lack of emotions. Should one still engage in sexual encounters, the physiological aspects of are usually intact, which means being able to achieve an erected state, and reaching ejaculation.
Only differences are: Lack of emotions connected to the sexual act, the partner, numbness in the penis, low ejaculatory semen volume.
The problem actually looks a lot like PSSD, Post- Ssri Sexual Dysfunction, although a lot of people seem to get it even if they have not used SSRI's or related antidepressants (TCA's, SNRI's etc.).
My own problems arose after prolonged serious stress, and although I started using SSRI's afterwards, the sexual problems where already present before the treatment had began, and they didn't change in nature after the treatment had begun or ended. I have found several stories from young males (of both hetero- and homo-oriented sexuality) who have retold the same story, or a story that closely resembles my own: (my own words)
Up to a certain age (16-22) normal sexual drive was present. After that, a decline in sexual interest (and interest in partners) occured over one to three years.
Some had emotional problems attached to their sexuality, some had not. The homosexual person's story revealed that he was already "out of the closet", and comfortable in his sexuality. This implies that the problem is different from interpersonal anxiety around sex.
Symptoms are as described above.
It's hard to grasp, but it's like "Doing the movements of sexual intercourse, while having the mental state of doing paperwork", you can do it; but it's no more arousing than doing your tax return.
Oh, and on therapy, I myself was very anxious about my decline in sexual drive and ability, and went to a certified sex therapist. Although the sessions didn't help with my sex drive, they made a substantial improvement in making me more comfortable with my situation and accepting condition.
And on the note on latent homosexuality or other sexuality differing from one's own percieved one; I have seriously considered different sexualities, thinking that perhaps my sexuality had shifted from hetero to homo or other. This made me more open to thinking differently about sexuality and more accepting of other sexualities than the norm, however, I did not find anything that could make me sexually aroused.
Togameru> It would be interesting if you could give your opinion on my description, if it differs from your own experience and if so, then how! Please respond.
Edited by robbs, 16 January 2010 - 12:53 PM.