Hey Everyone,
I've come here looking for some advice. I'm sorry in advance if this is the wrong forum.
I was diagnosed with PTSD around three years ago from an assault. I went on a downward spiral since then. I refused antidepressants until recently because I had been on some as a teenager and it was hell. I went on Wellbutrin XL in my 20s, and that seemed to have a positive effect without all the horrible side effects and transition period. However, I was in the UK at the time of diagnosis and Wellbutrin is not prescribed there as an anti-depressant. I moved to the Netherlands recently. I went to see a doctor because I was pretty much non-functioning at this point.
My symptoms:
- Extreme fatigue - sleeping 12-16 hours a day easily. I don't recall waking up throughout the night but may have.
- Lack of memory - sometimes I can't even remember what I did a few hours ago at worst. But usually asking me what I did yesterday is a challenge. My understanding of time is completely jumbled and confused.
- Lack of verbal fluency
- I have completely forgotten rules of grammar when writing (but Grammarly fixes that)
- Creativity - virtually nil (was in design field previously)
- I am a hollow shell of a human being. At first, it was nightmares, agoraphobia, panic attacks but then at some point I just shut off emotionally - probably as self-preservation.
My Diet:
Is absolute crap - I've packed on 80+ lbs over the past 1-2yrs and eat junk - I find it soothing.
Exercise:
None
After seeing the doctor two months ago, we agreed to go on Wellbutrin XL 300mg. He thought something else would be better for me and my PTSD, but I said I was uncomfortable trying anything else at this point due to previous experiences with anti-depressants. Wellbutrin was the only one that didn't have horrible side effects. Fast forward two months. Wellbutrin has helped me out of the deep depression but not enough to make my life enjoyable again. It's tolerable. I'm experiencing massive brain fog, fatigue and aches and pains.
On follow-up, we discussed Modafinil, as I've read a lot about it. He said he wouldn't prescribe it until he had done his own research on it for off-label use. I went back this week, and he said he was happy to try it out and prescribed me 200mg/day.
I took 100mg for the first time today - and I feel nothing. That was 2 hours ago. I'm wondering if its because I weigh 225lbs?
My question is:
What do you think would be a good stack for me? I've read a bit and seems noopept is pretty popular. I'm looking to solve the above problems. I want to go back to work and be a part of society again. It's super lonely where I'm at right now, and it's not living. I'm in a prison as far as I'm concerned.
Also, if you could, recommend me a reliable source for purchasing the goods. I'm in Europe. Netherlands currently but am moving to Portugal in a month.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and answer.
