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Long-term inattentiveness, lack of motivation, anxiety and brain-fog. [possible bipolar]

anxiety depression fatugue fog focus concentration bipolar mood cognition memory

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#1 不滅の

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Posted 02 January 2017 - 11:00 AM


Hi,

 

As the title suggests I have been suffering from a number of cognitive symptoms for a long time and the recent introduction of depressive and 'mood-swing' elements prompted me to take action once again. I have a forthcoming appointment with my old psychologist but in the meantime I'm looking into lifestyle and routine changes, alternative treatments and general advice from people who've gone through the same. I will try to keep personal details to a minimum but I think sharing the history of one's brain health and how it effects one's life will make it more relatable. TL;DR list of symptoms at the end.

 

The first inkling of what could be a problem turned up when I was ~10 years old. At this time two things happened that MIGHT be related to the problem.

 

1) I developed myopia in a very short span of time and needed glasses. It has not gotten significantly worse since then, 17 years later, with only my left eye becoming visibly worse.

2) My parents divorced and I found myself at the center of the custodial tug-of-war, legal manipulation and many strange and confusing emotions that I have only short fleeting memories of. Following this, I was in the custody of a mostly abscent-minded mother and her conga-line of dickish providers.

 

Starting from the 10-year mark, this is when a noticable drop in my previously solid school performance took place and every consecutive school year became worse and worse, with teachers often claiming inattentiveness, disruption and bad attendance record up until I was unable to pass into highschool after several resits and finally closed the lid on any possibility of a higher education. The main reason for this was an inability to focus that still plagues me; I could not sit down to read or do homework without RLS and constant invasive daydreaming. Focusing on a thought rather than a physical action is also an absolute struggle. At this point I was prescribed adhd/ocd medications to no effect. Moving forward obsessiveness and ticks became a factor with strict 'all or nothing' perfectionism and various urges like hard blinking, muscle contractions and symmetrical stimulation (these were possible to control but very demanding). RLS became more prominent and seemingly related to cognition; I get a big urge to get up and move whenever I need to contemplate something (like, say, a math prblem) and often finding myself cunjuring up scenarios where I am explaining it to someone else as I walk about the room.

 

Note: perhaps related to RLS, I can think far clearly when experiencing vibration (like in a running car). In fact, a vibrating car engine is the only thing that could make me experience falling asleep when extremely tired as most normal people do with all the headbobbing and stuff. PS. As I write this my legs and shaking up a storm.

 

As I turned 19 my social life, interection and my motivation where 100% rock-bottom as they are to this day and I was spending the majrity of my time indoors. I was living on my own and things took a turn for the worse during a period of elevated emotional sensitivity. During this short period I was very prone to rage, often screaming at inanimate objects and electronics, breaking of walls and biting my fingers nice and calloused. I also experienced highly elevated libido as my porn habits became more extreme and was masturbating 5 times a day. This is the point where, and I hate to even recall or admit this, that I ended up killing 5 consecutive pet cats from physical trauma in fits of rage. Thankfully I no longer have these anger issues.

 

It was not a year later before I got my first taste of anxiety. One night I woke up to odd sensations all over my body followed by weeks of nervousness, insomnia and suspicion until one night I begged my dad to rush me the ER over a dire feeling of impending doom. The Panic-attacks lasted, on-and-off, until recently and while I do get the occasional elevated anxiety it does not break into a full-blown attack anymore. That said, anxiety is still a major component playing against my well-being. During this time my motivation took a direct hit as I spent days on end locked up in my room looking up at the ceiling. I became highly sensitive to stress and changes in my environment, often becoming dizzy and anxious with cold, hunger, thirst, pain, etc. In fact, the degree and type of anxiety is how I currently decide to turn on the AC, eat or drink, ect. as the normal feelings and urges are overshadowed.

 

Short-term memory completely went down the toilet as did recollection of non-specific words at times which made conversation and relationship-building even more of a hassle. Combine this with the inability to focus, compulsive daydreaming, ticks and anxiety I started to feel as if I could no longer experience the world as I once did. I cannot take in and comprehend a large beautiful vista without tunnelvisioning and zoning out. My senses dulled and I can no longer find joy in most things besides a cheap laugh at a dark joke. I felt only a mild discomfort and vertigo during the sudden and hectic period before my grandmother's death.

 

Recently I have begun to experience a novel depressive state alongside the aformentioned symptoms. Somewhere inside that mess of anxiety, random thought patterns and nihilism there is now an element of sadness/loneliness/melancholy and I have become increasingly worried that it may lead to suicide. NOW, THAT IS NOT TO SAY I have ANY suicidal thoughts yet but I do worry, realistically or not, that it may go down that route if left untreated. In reality I still have a very strong sense of self-preservation, it's just that whenever I think about it I can't find any justification for it. Only that "dieing is bad". What I DO know is that this depressive state happens in periods. It goes on for weeks pulling along with it anxiety, brain-fog, proneness to anger, memory issues and a general lack of motivation until it abruptly stops, giving way to a much shorter period of no depression, lessened symptoms and better social cohesion. During this short time I find myself getting more work done, cooking up new recipes, sharing them with the neighbours, spring cleaning the whole house, going out for walks, ect.

 

And this is where I'm at.

 

 

=============================

 

TL;DR
 

Current symptoms:
-Early onset of Myopia (unrelated?)

-RLS

-General Inattentiveness and daydreaming

-Inability to Focus on specific thought patterns
Stimuli like vibration and music seem to help this but not nearly enough to restore functionality. (related to RLS?)

-Mild ticks
Largely controllable as long as I am aware of them.
Seem to worsen while in the process of 'fighting' aformentioned lack of focus aka. while trying to concentrate.
Most are what I've come to describe as 'symmetrical ticks' in where a specific stimulation on one side of my body prompts a 'need' or 'tick' to experience that same sensation on the same part of the other side of my body. This could include anything from brushing my hand going through a narrow corridor or bright lights in either side of my face. As well as perceived stimulation, such as when stepping on a tile pattern.

-Obsessiveness/OCPD (as diagnosed)
Very typical OCPD, perfectionist behavior such as an 'all or nothing' attitude to cleaning my house/bedroom, obsessive tweaking of software and compartmentalization of various areas of imperfections for the sake of efficiency. To be fair this is no longer a major issue and I have largely got over the worst of it.

 

-Anxiety/Panic Attacks/Social Anxiety

 

-Excessive Libido
Most prominent during the 'depressive' stage.

 

-Short-term Memory
I also have a somewhat persistent issue with recalling non-specific key words while trying to construct a sentence. The more I try to pinpoint it in my head the more ticks and stray thoughts show up. When this happens, similar-sounding words seem to rush to the tip of my tongue in leiu of the right one.

 

-Depression?
'Low' depressive state that occurs in periods longer than the period without. Accompanied by elevated symptoms. No suicidal thoughts.
 


Edited by 不滅の, 02 January 2017 - 11:50 AM.


#2 hdl_1

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Posted 02 January 2017 - 04:24 PM

Are you on any medication (or was)? Did you experience with any supplements?

Your symptoms seem to point towards a dopaminergic (RLS, anger) imbalance and maybe an iron deficiency according to the article below. This could also explain the fits of anger and depression.

http://www.hopkinsme...rls/causes.html

http://www.rlcure.com/dopamine.html

There are a few supplements that are a catch all for mental health. i.e. NAC (N-Acetylcysteine), Melatonin, Curcumin/Piperine, Vit. D, Magnesium (citrate or other bio available form). The last article above has a more comprehensive list.


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#3 不滅の

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Posted 02 January 2017 - 07:26 PM

Are you on any medication (or was)? Did you experience with any supplements?

Your symptoms seem to point towards a dopaminergic (RLS, anger) imbalance and maybe an iron deficiency according to the article below. This could also explain the fits of anger and depression.

http://www.hopkinsme...rls/causes.html

http://www.rlcure.com/dopamine.html

There are a few supplements that are a catch all for mental health. i.e. NAC (N-Acetylcysteine), Melatonin, Curcumin/Piperine, Vit. D, Magnesium (citrate or other bio available form). The last article above has a more comprehensive list.


Sent from my SM-G850W using Tapatalk

​I took low-dose anafranil for a year after being diagnosed with OCPD-induced GAD which helped slightly but it was doing nothing for everything else and my sleep wasn't getting any better either so I discontinued it. I've experimented with a few supplements and nootropics on there own, such are a few racitams and noopept which did nothing and recently a combination of r. rosea and l-theanine which helped keep my anxiety in check.

​Based on people's experiences on this forum I threw together a number of supplements and made a stack I started taking today. Many of the second article's recommendations are present.

​2 tsp Fish oil (450mg EPA,DHA + 5ug D + 50mg C + 5mg E a-TE) , split in 2

L-Theanine 250mg x2


R. Rosea 250mg x2

B Complex (100mg of B1, B2, B3, B6, Folic Acid, B12, Biotin, Panthatonic Acid, Choline, Inositol, PABA)


Chromium Picolinate

Zinc 10mg

Kelp tablet, 450ug Iodine


Thinking about adding Magnesium, Curcumin and ALCAR to the mix. Are there any recommended doses for these substances?



#4 hdl_1

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Posted 02 January 2017 - 07:45 PM

I usually take the recommended dose on the package for Magnesium (i have mg bisglycinate). I used to take ALCAR but I stopped it since I'm taking Mildronate (switches brain metabolism to glucose instead of lipids and lowers carnitine). I used to take 500mg twice daily. I didn't find a recommended dose for Curcumin so I take 500mg twice daily. Note that you need to add Piperine to curcumin for absorption.
Supplement that you may want to add to your stack: spirulina (for iron), NAC (for overall brain health) and melatonin (potent antioxydant, may improve depression, lack of plays an important role in mental disorders). Others of interest may be the class of adaptogens (ashawaganda, bacopa monierri, etc.)


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#5 不滅の

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Posted 03 January 2017 - 12:45 PM

I usually take the recommended dose on the package for Magnesium (i have mg bisglycinate). I used to take ALCAR but I stopped it since I'm taking Mildronate (switches brain metabolism to glucose instead of lipids and lowers carnitine). I used to take 500mg twice daily. I didn't find a recommended dose for Curcumin so I take 500mg twice daily. Note that you need to add Piperine to curcumin for absorption.
Supplement that you may want to add to your stack: spirulina (for iron), NAC (for overall brain health) and melatonin (potent antioxydant, may improve depression, lack of plays an important role in mental disorders). Others of interest may be the class of adaptogens (ashawaganda, bacopa monierri, etc.)

 

I'm thinking, is there any good evidence that vitamins and minerals have a positive effect on brain health above RDA? Because looking at the cronometer, the breakfast I had this morning alone has my Bs at half RDA, Iron at 120%, Zinc at 40% without any meat and magnesium at 30%. Omega3-6 are ~110% each. According to the article you linked there is a factor (inflammation-related?) preventing many RLS brains from having access to the Iron present in the bloodstream so if that's the case with my brain how does oral iron supplements help me?

 

And thanks for the advice.



#6 hdl_1

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Posted 03 January 2017 - 01:33 PM

I can only speak from my own experience with supplements. I suffered from extreme fatigue, not able to focus, no concentration, anxiety, depression,possible dp/dr. It was a considerable effort to get on with the day, every day.
I used to have about 6 coffees a day just to be somewhat semi alert.
I started with supplementation, above RDA for about a year and a half by tackling individual symptoms. ( inflamation being one of them )
I now only drink coffee in the morning, I have sustained focus and concentration all day, I no longer crash in the evenings, my anxiety improved considerably, no longer depressed symptoms, overall better positive outlook on all aspects of my life.
What I use for inflamation is curcumin/piperine, msm, trimetylglycine. Some of the nootropics I use (i.e. noopept, mildronate and sometimes Mexidol) also have anti-inflammatory effects.
My suggestion to you is to tackle individual symptoms based on research (like you just did for inflamation) and find the supplements that address those issues.

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#7 不滅の

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Posted 03 January 2017 - 07:49 PM

In regard to inflammation, I've been experiencing a series chronic symptoms that have been persistent for as long as I can remember, which may be associated with inflammation if I am understanding it correctly.

​1) Various mild 'sickly' symptoms that come and go at random. Nothing major and could easily be explained away as a mild allergy; throat irritations, some coughing/sneezing, wet nose that sometimes droops, headaches and fatigue. This is strange when you consider I have not been "sick" with anything common (cold, flu) for a good 6-7 years until last week when I caught a really bad cold for some reason.

2) Folliculitis on my tighs. This has been persistent for many years until very recently when it abruptly stopped some time after I started taking L-Theanine & R. Rosea. (Theanine is associated with better immune function?) Who knows. I'm glad it's gone even if my legs are littered with scars.

​3) Blocked sinuses. Again, for as long as I can remember I've been able to breathe only from my mouth because my sinuses are always completely blocked. The left nostril occasionally unblocked slightly during cardio-intensive tasks but nothing besides a decongestant could unblock it for a few hours. This has not been the case ever since I started my anti-inflammatory diet (few days). It's too early to tell but it makes me hopeful.

​4) There are 2 places on my body where I experience localized acute inflammation; my wisdom teeth which don't have the space to settle without putting pressure on the surrounding gum tissue, and a minor injury to my tailbone. Both these area flare up every once in a while at the same time and any cut or bruise seems to become more tender during this period which leads me to believe it's related.

​There seems to be some science behind this inflammationg biz and while there are a lot of uncertainties I'm at a point where I'll trust the anecdotes and see where they take me. Because I sure as hell wasn't going anywhere before. I will let you know if I see any improvements.



#8 magniloquentc0unt

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Posted 03 January 2017 - 08:06 PM

interesting thread, especially the inflammation symptoms, i also have similar issues, especially the blocked sinuses part.

Do you have to urinate frequently and/or have always a "bladder still half full" feeling? If that is the case you could try some pseudoephedrine, which is available OTC (or ephedrine if you have access to that).

you will be amazed at how it feels to breath properly... and it also helps with the fatigue, sleepiness and concentration. 

its not a solution but a plaster for those extra bad days



#9 hdl_1

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Posted 03 January 2017 - 10:26 PM

In regard to inflammation, I've been experiencing a series chronic symptoms that have been persistent for as long as I can remember, which may be associated with inflammation if I am understanding it correctly.

​1) Various mild 'sickly' symptoms that come and go at random. Nothing major and could easily be explained away as a mild allergy; throat irritations, some coughing/sneezing, wet nose that sometimes droops, headaches and fatigue. This is strange when you consider I have not been "sick" with anything common (cold, flu) for a good 6-7 years until last week when I caught a really bad cold for some reason.

2) Folliculitis on my tighs. This has been persistent for many years until very recently when it abruptly stopped some time after I started taking L-Theanine & R. Rosea. (Theanine is associated with better immune function?) Who knows. I'm glad it's gone even if my legs are littered with scars.

​3) Blocked sinuses. Again, for as long as I can remember I've been able to breathe only from my mouth because my sinuses are always completely blocked. The left nostril occasionally unblocked slightly during cardio-intensive tasks but nothing besides a decongestant could unblock it for a few hours. This has not been the case ever since I started my anti-inflammatory diet (few days). It's too early to tell but it makes me hopeful.

​4) There are 2 places on my body where I experience localized acute inflammation; my wisdom teeth which don't have the space to settle without putting pressure on the surrounding gum tissue, and a minor injury to my tailbone. Both these area flare up every once in a while at the same time and any cut or bruise seems to become more tender during this period which leads me to believe it's related.


​There seems to be some science behind this inflammationg biz and while there are a lot of uncertainties I'm at a point where I'll trust the anecdotes and see where they take me. Because I sure as hell wasn't going anywhere before. I will let you know if I see any improvements.

I also had the issue of a blocked nostril which in turn would create sinus issues and more fatigue. My nostril is now continuously unblocked since I started the anti inflamation supplements. My head feels more clear as well.

I just did a quick search on theanine and it does modulate immune functions.

https://www.ncbi.nlm...les/PMC4772912/

Good luck and keep us updated!

#10 不滅の

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Posted 06 January 2017 - 09:32 PM

interesting thread, especially the inflammation symptoms, i also have similar issues, especially the blocked sinuses part.

Do you have to urinate frequently and/or have always a "bladder still half full" feeling? If that is the case you could try some pseudoephedrine, which is available OTC (or ephedrine if you have access to that).

you will be amazed at how it feels to breath properly... and it also helps with the fatigue, sleepiness and concentration. 

its not a solution but a plaster for those extra bad days

 

Sorry it took me a while to reply. Come to think of it I have experienced a bladder issue in the past but it seems to have resolved itself before any supplements on my part. I don't know but given how hedonistic my life was I can only owe it to my youth that I'm this healthy lol.



#11 gamesguru

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Posted 06 January 2017 - 11:19 PM

i read the bit about the divorce and dickish providers and my first instinct was borderline.  cause you see that with dysfunctional families a lot, in the kids, environmental stressors really play a big role.  it's a complex disease, doesn't affect everyone the same.  but it can explain your ADHD-like symptoms (i was once diagnosed as adhd and depression).  it can also explain the all or nothing clean my house mentality, but definitely a little sprinkling of OCD is at work too.  and i regret to inform you comorbid OCD schizophrenia has the absolute worst treatment response!  shit's like terminal cancer.  the symptoms are actually not bad, and i would explain this by the fact that you haven't been exposed to "that many" environmental stressors, or your life situation hasn't gotten that desperate that you've gone completely suicidal.  or you never could progress to that stage, and your rather fit a milder diagnosis of cyclothymia.  either way i'd recommend mineral metals, ca, mg, zn, Li, and chromium.  an herbal adaptogen couldnt hurt either, rhodiola, ash, ginkgo, ginseng, bacopa, etc etc

 

the anxiety and excessive libido are classic schizotypal symptoms.

 

the RLS and ticks suggest something along the lines of tourretts

 

keep in mind the above conclusions were reached by an amateur.. one with a bias, who views the world as if distorted through a schizotypal borderline lens



#12 Quaker32

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Posted 07 January 2017 - 12:01 AM

be careful with tat. i thought i had problems and could never progress further.....i was wrong. 

 

get treated asap and don't delay anything.



#13 不滅の

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 11:21 AM

i read the bit about the divorce and dickish providers and my first instinct was borderline.  cause you see that with dysfunctional families a lot, in the kids, environmental stressors really play a big role.  it's a complex disease, doesn't affect everyone the same.  but it can explain your ADHD-like symptoms (i was once diagnosed as adhd and depression).  it can also explain the all or nothing clean my house mentality, but definitely a little sprinkling of OCD is at work too.  and i regret to inform you comorbid OCD schizophrenia has the absolute worst treatment response!  shit's like terminal cancer.  the symptoms are actually not bad, and i would explain this by the fact that you haven't been exposed to "that many" environmental stressors, or your life situation hasn't gotten that desperate that you've gone completely suicidal.  or you never could progress to that stage, and your rather fit a milder diagnosis of cyclothymia.  either way i'd recommend mineral metals, ca, mg, zn, Li, and chromium.  an herbal adaptogen couldnt hurt either, rhodiola, ash, ginkgo, ginseng, bacopa, etc etc

 

the anxiety and excessive libido are classic schizotypal symptoms.

 

the RLS and ticks suggest something along the lines of tourretts

 

keep in mind the above conclusions were reached by an amateur.. one with a bias, who views the world as if distorted through a schizotypal borderline lens

 

Aye, I mentioned that because i'm aware of many cases of various mental issues with single-parent children. Though, as you said my symptoms don't seem to be as agressive as they sometimes are. Perhaps, this is because I live on an island with an area just over 60km2 and even broken families are more tight-knit here than broken families in the US or mainland Europe. The situation with Schizo sounds like a nightmare and  I hope you're doing well about it.

 

A little update on my little lifestyle change; seems this first week and a half was the worst time to start monitoring my health. Very dry and cold weather (55%humid instead of the average 80%). My eyes burn, fingers and lips are cracked! In any case my nose is still not nearly as conjested as it used to be so something I'm doing is right. It turns out the cur/pip suppliments I got were pretty low dose (100mg curcumin) and very expensive, so I'm taking 3 a day as I wait for my powdercity order to arrive. I also upped my figh oil to 4 tbs a day (packaging states it's 450mg DHA/EPA per 10g (or ~2 tbsp)). I still take R.Rosea, L-Theanine, B Complex, D3, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Chromium, Iodine and Zinc.

 

I still haven't had any major mood swings, nor any hindering anxiety (some isolated bouts) and my nose has air passing through it which is amazing :D. RLS is noticibly reduced but the racing thoughts, while reduced slightly, are still there. What I have noticed that after the day is through and I return home in the evening I get sad again. Not what I'd call 'depressed' and certainly has an element of anxiety but it's just a feeling of sadness. I'll wait this one out.

 

 

Now, my cash reserves are a little low at the time but I do have some leftover supplements from previous experimentation that I'm considering adding to my stack. Can any of this help me?; ALCAR, ALA, Noopept, Pramiracetam, Piracetam, Phenylpiracetam and melatonin.



#14 hdl_1

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 02:35 PM

I strongly suggest Melatonin. It's my first supplement that I tried and I stuck with it ever since.
I'd say NAC (N acetylcysteine) as well. For me NAC is a great normaliser of my overall emotional state.

Noopept has marked anxyolitic (anti stress) effects and improves your focus (at least for me). I always take it with Alpha GPC. I found it works best this way.

You could also add L Tryptophan which is not that expensive and works well to boost serotonin levels. I use this once in a while, as needed, when I feel racing toughts or general uneaseness.

#15 gamesguru

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 03:19 PM

if you already have ALCAR, i would take that too.  and one of the more potent ones you have laying around, maybe noopept?  not sure how low your cash reserves are, but mineral water may be good too.  Gerolsteiner has per litre 345mg calcium, 100mg magnesium, and 130mcg lithium.  I still like to buy magnesium and zinc on the side.  But drinking two 750mL containers gives more than enough calcium, ~520mg.  Great stuff for someone with casein allergies!  and it's funny people would not complain of spending two dollars for a large pop, but to spend $1.29 on some mineral water, which has actual health benefits and even tastes better, seems to them absurd?



#16 不滅の

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Posted 18 January 2017 - 11:58 PM

It has now been a week and a half since my last post. In my defense I was busy and had no internet connection most of the time because of strong winds (dont ask).

​The first week had been a relatively positive experience. I have experienced a fairly leveled mood throughout, not much in the way of depression and my anxiety has not flared up one bit. The ocpd symptoms have not been effected, though, and while I've certainly been more productive I still have great trouble directing my focus to one particular task or thought. One of the bigger issues that I face is the inability to finish a task in a reasonable amount of time due to the constant tangents my thinking takes and the associated ticks and urges that come with it. But more on that later.

​During the first week I maintained my new healthy diet but allowed myself a few generous portions of regular-wheat pasta dishes as well as side-bread to see if it would have any negative effect. It did not. However, starting from last Monday I've both increased my intake of cholesterol and saturated fats (eggs, butter, and coconut oil) and switched immediately from all-fish to all-meat as my protein source (supplements, vegetables and Omega-6 intake remained constant). I understand this may be a complete coincidence but the mood swings were in full swing yesterday and earlier today and my anxiety flared up last night. In particular, my ticks and ocd symptoms increased dramatically during the day today to the point where I could not, for a single minute, get my mind off the tile patterns/irregularities my foot was stepping on and needless to say I was quite irritable. And with that I've switched back to fish being 90% of my meat starting from tonight and will update if there is any progress (or otherwise).


Lastly, I've been doing some thinking about what exactly it means to have "ocd". A cloudy and haphazard thinking process with a difficulty directing all that "mental energy" to one idea or task for a prolonged period seems to be the common factor here. Ticks and various forms of obsession, including anxiety, seem to not only emerge from this condition but become worse as one fights against it and tries to focus. On one hand trying to focus on reading and understanding text from a book increases these secondary symptoms, while on the other hand, activities and situations in which the person is subjected to strong physical stimuli all over his body such as intense exercise, a lively conversation, a vibrating car engine, a hot shower or the constant friction from a thick layer of quilts seems to not only lessen these symptoms greatly but ease the tangled web that is the oc/p/d brain.

​​Some of you may be aware of Google's Photos AI that identifies images by their content. "Essentially, the network emulates the neurons in the human brain, with a single core of the network 'firing' every time it sees a part of the image it thinks it recognizes". You can try this out yourself at dreamscopeapp.com and see how the system works by uploading a picture and having the AI plaster per-determined 'expectations' all over it's details but see how it keeps the original image intact. However, it has been noted by some that if you upload an image of white noise the AI goes into overdrive trying to find a pattern that isn't there and plasters hundreds or thousands of the same expectation over it in hopes that one will hit a pattern. When you consider known human patter-recognition errors such as Pareidolia you can see how the brain is constantly placing the expectation of eyes, nose and mouths onto the environment in hopes of seeing the face of a lion behind the foliage before it makes you its dinner. A side-effect of this in modern society is seeing faces in clouds, Jesus on toast and a smiling face in your coffee.

This may partly explain why it seems that more developed and safer societies have a statistically higher higher rate of anxiety, depression and suicide, among other disorders. This may explain, for instance, why a third of US women describe living in constant fear of sexual assault when statistically their society has less sexual assaults than any time in history. This could be seen as an extension to Error-management Theory. The brain, running on software that is hundreds of thousands of years old, is designed to subconsciously and continuously look for patterns in the environment that may not be there in the same abundance in a modern society. And where no pattern exist the brain, much like Google's AI, will go into overdrive to find a pattern that it was programmed to expect.

Given that dysfunctional families and/or childhood trauma seems to be a recurring factor in a significant portion of mental disorder cases and considering the fact that epigenetic factors such as famine or high cortisol levels during pregnancy are known to have an effect on a child's physiology and behavior. It's possible that individuals like me somehow developed a greater 'expectation' in the brain of danger and stimuli and in the sedentary white noise of modern society the oc/p/d brain goes into overdrive trying to detect a pattern that is not there and ultimately ends up creating patterns in the forms of anxiety and ticks to compensate, in a perhals not-too-dissimilar way to the hallucinations experienced by some people undergoing sensory deprevation
.

 

I don't know how accurate that is or if it is how to best apply a remedy but after contemplating I've decided to give 2 things a try. 1) I want to bring more natural stimulation to my life so I will start doing a number of cardio and resistance exercises as part of my daily schedule as well as increase my social interactions. And 2) Long-term meditation as an attempt to tame my thinking.

I'll keep you posted.


Edited by 不滅の, 19 January 2017 - 12:04 AM.


#17 hdl_1

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Posted 19 January 2017 - 12:41 AM

What supplements/nootropics/medication are you currently taking and since when?

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#18 pecanpie

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Posted 19 January 2017 - 09:33 AM

For what it's worth the diagnostic criteria for Bipolar 2 are below. Warning wall of text ahead. Not saying that is or is not what you have but this is what a traditional psychiatrist would be considering. There is also Unspecified Bipolar which is kind of a catchall when a person doesn't exactly fit the traditional criteria

 

There is also the concept of Bipolar Spectrum Disorder which is not mainstream enough to be included in the DSM-V but a fair number of psychiatrists see it this way and this Doctor has an extensive website regarding the concept and treatment options. 

 

http://psycheducation.org/

 

This scoring criteria was developed at Harvard and is a 100 point scale to determine "How bipolar are you?" on the bipolar spectrum.

http://psycheducatio...ty-index-table/

 

 

Diagnostic Criteria 296.89 (F31.81)

For a diagnosis of bipolar II disorder, it is necessary to meet the following criteria for a current

or past hypomanie episode and the following criteria for a current or past major depressive

episode:

Hypomanie Episode

A. A distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive, or irritable mood

and abnormally and persistently increased activity or energy, lasting at least 4 consecutive

days and present most of the day, nearly every day.

B. During the period of mood disturbance and increased energy and activity, three (or more)

of the following symptoms have persisted (four if the mood is only irritable), represent a noticeable

change from usual behavior, and have been present to a significant degree:

1. Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity.

2. Decreased need for sleep (e.g., feels rested after only 3 hours of sleep).

3. More talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking.

4. Flight of ideas or subjective experience that thoughts are racing.

5. Distractibility (i.e., attention too easily drawn to unimportant or irrelevant external

stimuli), as reported or obsen/ed.

6. Increase in goal-directed activity (either socially, at work or school, or sexually) or

psychomotor agitation.

7. Excessive involvement in activities that have a high potential for painful consequences

(e.g., engaging in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, or

foolish business investments).

C. The episode is associated with an unequivocal change in functioning that is uncharacteristic

of the individual when not symptomatic.

D. The disturbance in mood and the change in functioning are observable by others.

E. The episode is not severe enough to cause marked impairment in social or occupational

functioning or to necessitate hospitalization. If there are psychotic features, the

episode is, by definition, manic.

F. The episode is not attributable to the physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug

of abuse, a medication or other treatment).

Note: A full hypomanie episode that emerges during antidepressant treatment (e.g.,

medication, electroconvulsive therapy) but persists at a fully syndromal level beyond

the physiological effect of that treatment is sufficient evidence for a hypomanie episode

diagnosis. However, caution is indicated so that one or two symptoms (particularly increased

irritability, edginess, or agitation following antidepressant use) are not taken

as sufficient for diagnosis of a hypomanie episode, nor necessarily indicative of a bipolar

diathesis.

Major Depressive Episode

A. Five (or more) of the following symptoms have been present during the same 2-week

period and represent a change from previous functioning; at least one of the symptoms

is either (1 ) depressed mood or (2) loss of interest or pleasure.

Note: Do not include symptoms that are clearly attributable to a medical condition.

1. Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, as indicated by either subjective

report (e.g., feels sad, empty, or hopeless) or observation made by others (e.g.,

appears tearful). (Note: In children and adolescents, can be irritable mood.)

2. Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the

day, nearly every day (as indicated by either subjective account or observation).

3. Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain (e.g., a change of more than

5% of body weight in a month), or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every

day. (Note: In children, consider failure to make expected weight gain.)

4. Insomnia or hypersomnia nearly every day.

5. Psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day (observable by others; not

merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down).

6. Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.

7. Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt (which may be delusional)

nearly every day (not merely self-reproach or guilt about being sick).

8. Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day (either

by subjective account or as observed by others).

9. Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying), recurrent suicidal ideation without

a specific plan, a suicide attempt, or a specific plan for committing suicide.

B. The symptoms cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational,

or other important areas of functioning.

C. The episode is not attributable to the physiological effects of a substance or another

medical condition.

Note: Criteria A-C above constitute a major depressive episode.

Note: Responses to a significant loss (e.g., bereavement, financial ruin, losses from a natural

disaster, a serious medical illness or disability) may include the feelings of intense sadness,

rumination about the loss, insomnia, poor appetite, and weight loss noted in Criterion

A, which may resemble a depressive episode. Although such symptoms may be understandable

or considered appropriate to the loss, the presence of a major depressive episode

in addition to the normal response to a significant loss should be carefully considered. This

decision inevitably requires the exercise of clinical judgment based on the individual’s history

and the cultural norms for the expression of distress in the context of loss.^

Bipolar II Disorder

A. Criteria have been met for at least one hypomanie episode (Criteria A-F under “Hypomanic

Episode” above) and at least one major depressive episode (Criteria A-C under

“Major Depressive Episode” above).

B. There has never been a manic episode.

C. The occurrence of the hypomanie episode(s) and major depressive episode(s) is not

better explained by schizoaffective disorder, schizophrenia, schizophreniform disorder,

delusional disorder, or other specified or unspecified schizophrenia spectrum and

other psychotic disorder.

D. The symptoms of depression or the unpredictability caused by frequent alternation between

periods of depression and hypomania causes clinically significant distress or impairment

in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.

 

 

Diagnostic Features

Bipolar II disorder is characterized by a clinical course of recurring mood episodes consisting

of one or more major depressive episodes (Criteria A-C under "Major Depressive

Episode") and at least one hypomanie episode (Criteria A-F under "Hypomanie Episode").

The major depressive episode must last at least 2 weeks, and the hypomarüc episode

must last at least 4 days, to meet the diagnostic criteria. During the mood episode(s),

the requisite number of symptoms must be present most of the day, nearly every day, and

represent a noticeable change from usual behavior and functioning. The presence of a

manic episode during the course of illness precludes the diagnosis of bipolar II disorder

(Criterion B under "Bipolar II Disorder"). Episodes of substance/medication-induced depressive

disorder or substance/medication-induced bipolar and related disorder (representing

the physiological effects of a medication, other somatic treatments for depression,

drugs of abuse, or toxin exposure) or of depressive and related disorder due to another

medical condition or bipolar and related disorder due to another medical condition do not

count toward a diagnosis of bipolar II disorder unless they persist beyond the physiological

effects of the treatment or substance and then meet duration criteria for an episode. In

addition, the episodes must not be better accounted for by schizoaffective disorder and are

not superimposed on schizophrenia, schizophreniform disorder, delusional disorder, or

other specified or unspecified schizophrenia spectrum or other psychotic disorders (Criterion

C under "Bipolar II Disorder"). The depressive episodes or hypomanie fluctuations

must cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other

important areas of functioning (Criterion D under "Bipolar II Disorder"); however, for hypomanie

episodes, this requirement does not have to be met. A hypomanie episode that

causes significant impairment would likely qualify for the diagnosis of manic episode and,

therefore, for a lifetime diagnosis of bipolar I disorder. The recurrent major depressive episodes

are often more frequent and lengthier than those occurring in bipolar I disorder.

Individuals with bipolar II disorder typically present to a clinician during a major depressive

episode and are unlikely to complain initially of hypomania. Typically, the hypomanie

episodes themselves do not cause impairment. Instead, the impairment results

from the major depressive episodes or from a persistent pattern of unpredictable mood

changes and fluctuating, unreliable interpersonal or occupational functioning. Individuals

with bipolar II disorder may not view the hypomanie episodes as pathological or disadvantageous,

although others may be troubled by the individual's erratic behavior.

Clinical information from other informants, such as close friends or relatives, is often useful

in establishing the diagnosis of bipolar II disorder.

A hypomanie episode should not be confused with the several days of euthymia and restored

energy or activity that may follow remission of a major depressive episode. Despite the

substantial differences in duration and severity between a manic and hypomanie episode, bipolar

II disorder is not a "milder form" of bipolar I disorder. Compared with individuals with

bipolar I disorder, individuals with bipolar II disorder have greater chronicity of illness and

spend, on average, more time in the depressive phase of their illness, which can be severe and/

or disabling. Depressive symptoms co-occurring with a hypomanie episode or hypomanie

symptoms co-occurring with a depressive episode are common in individuals with bipolar Π

disorder and are overrepresented in females, particularly hypomania with mixed features. Individuals

experiencing hypomania with mixed features may not label their symptoms as hypomania,

but instead experience them as depression with increased energy or irritability.

Associated Features Supporting Diagnosis

A common feature of bipolar II disorder is impulsivity, which can contribute to suicide attempts

and substance use disorders. Impulsivity may also stem from a concurrent personality

disorder, substance use disorder, anxiety disorder, another mental disorder, or a

medical condition. There may be heightened levels of creativity in some individuals with

a bipolar disorder. However, that relationship may be nonlinear; that is, greater lifetime

creative accomplishments have been associated with milder forms of bipolar disorder, and

higher creativity has been found in unaffected family members. The individual's attachment

to heightened creativity during hypomanie episodes may contribute to ambivalence

about seeking treatment or undermine adherence to treatment.



#19 不滅の

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Posted 04 March 2017 - 03:05 PM

TAKE TWO! Because I closed the tab before submitting.


A month and a half since the last post. I've been slacking again haven't I? And what a mont and a half it has been, I've been following a regiment and it has had a notable improvement on me. I'm not 100%, hell i'm not even 50%, but I'm better.


To recap, this is what I've been swallowing this past month or more:
3000mg Fish oil (540mg EPA, a little less in DHA) [Some posts have claimed 2-3000mg of ethyl-EPA was a silver buller to their symptoms. Where do I get this?]
1200mg Curcumin + 30mg Piperine
250mg Magnesium as Citrate (should I take more? I can't find a dosage for this but it has helped!)
250mg Zinc
5000iU D3
250mg Vit C
Multi-Vit
B-Complex + 250mg Niacinamide
Some Kelp Iodine sometimes


In addition to this I've made come changes to my lifestyle that I would urge anyone to follow:
Started CBT again
Intermittent fasting
Mild CR and very low carb, low GI diet. Borderline Keto, 30-60g net carbs. Has been a noticable mood stabilizer and has detached my reward system from my metabilism. Losing weight too.
​8hs of sleep per night
10m cold shower first thing in the morning. Endorphins and Norepinephrine galore.
30m Intense cardio right after. Compliments body's peak cortisol production leading to a reduction. NGF production.
1hr resistance training. 3-4 times a week.
Brain exercise. Dual n-Back and learning a language. I started learning Japanese a will be perpetually learning a different language indefinately.

 



#20 Duchykins

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Posted 12 March 2017 - 06:11 AM

Anxiety, anger, mood swings, poor concentration, general restlessness, depression, anhedonia, chronic sinus inflammation ... sounds like high systemic histamine.  Not allergies specifically, but high histamine activity in the brain and everywhere else.  We are only just beginning to realize the role of histamine as an excitatory neurotransmitter and its role in various problems like ADHD, bipolar, schizophrenia, anxiety disorders, autism, migraine, etc.

 

Antihistamines now are beginning to be studied and used in conjunction with traditional psychiatric medications.


Edited by Duchykins, 12 March 2017 - 06:13 AM.


#21 Duchykins

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Posted 12 March 2017 - 06:40 AM

Increase Mg dose to 400 mg.  Try a magnesium that is bonded to something other than citrate or aspartate as these can exacerbate your excitability issues (eg citrates make me irritable as hell).  Take potassium, calcium, and taurine with it because they all work best together.

 

3 grams of fish oil daily is too much (especially if you are male) in addition to being a waste of money because your brain only takes in what it needs and you can't force extra in there, and the EPA/DHA ratio is screwed up (too much EPA).  Try a high DPA, high DHA, low EPA fish oil, take 1 gram.  I like Swanson's version.  DPA is neglected in most commercial fish oils.

 

Buy a bottle of 100 mg thiamine capsules, and a bottle of 100 mg riboflavin capsules.  Take two of each and see what happens (will not hurt you, but if you feel better then make that a 200 mg dose each twice a day).  I strongly recommend you look up thiamine and riboflavin in conjunction with your suspicions about your diagnosis.  You will be surprised at what you find in the medical literature.

 

1 or 2 mg sublingual adenosylcobalamin - NOT methylcobalamin.  You need both bioactive forms but methylcobalamin is overly popular for no good reason.  You body can make methylcobalamin from adenosylcobalamin but not vice versa.

 

Be careful with high doses of vitamin D - don't take above 1000 IU unless you actually know what your blood levels are.  Otherwise you could be seriously hurting yourself in the long run

 

Take a good look at your multivitamin.  If you are male, and it contains iron, throw it away.   Even just 2 or 5 mg iron supplementation does more harm than good to males who have no medical need for it.  Also look at the amount of copper.

 

Do not play with iodine supplements.  You didn't say specifically how much you are taking but those can be dangerous because there is a lot of bad information about iodine supplementation on the internet.  Whatever is in a multivitamin is enough for people with no medical reason to take extra iodine.

 

That extreme low carb diet will probably catch up to you in 10 or 20 years in a bad way, assuming your unique genetics and biochemistry can tolerate it for that long.    But the CBT, your physical activity and cold showers might be the most important things on that list, so kudos to you on that


Edited by Duchykins, 12 March 2017 - 06:46 AM.


#22 Duchykins

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Posted 12 March 2017 - 07:13 AM

​During the first week I maintained my new healthy diet but allowed myself a few generous portions of regular-wheat pasta dishes as well as side-bread to see if it would have any negative effect. It did not. However, starting from last Monday I've both increased my intake of cholesterol and saturated fats (eggs, butter, and coconut oil) and switched immediately from all-fish to all-meat as my protein source (supplements, vegetables and Omega-6 intake remained constant). I understand this may be a complete coincidence but the mood swings were in full swing yesterday and earlier today and my anxiety flared up last night. In particular, my ticks and ocd symptoms increased dramatically during the day today to the point where I could not, for a single minute, get my mind off the tile patterns/irregularities my foot was stepping on and needless to say I was quite irritable. And with that I've switched back to fish being 90% of my meat starting from tonight and will update if there is any progress (or otherwise).

 

 

Classic human reaction to extreme low-carb diet without medical need for it - sudden serotonin crash because the body partly relies on carbohydrates to synth serotonin.  All of those symptoms go straight back to low serotonin.  I've lost count how many times I've had to tell people this when they seem to be mystified at how shitty they feel on their new awesome low carb diet.   Happens to at least 90% of people who start such a diet.  I suspect 100% of otherwise healthy people but I can't prove it because sometimes people lie to themselves about their pet fads.  No one is immune to confirmation bias.

 

You have been deceived about low carb diets -  a fad that was begun by self-proclaimed gurus who cherry-picked medical literature about ketogenic diets - telling people all about the good they do in medicine while failing to mention any of the known side effects of such diets - even to the people with rare medical conditions who have a genuine need to avoid carbs.   This is lying by omission.   MDs generally know the side effects of keotgenic diets and only implement these diets when the condition is dire and the benefits outweighs the risks - especially with developing children.  For the average human, keto is perhaps worse than veganism at the generational level.  This means 20 to 25 years out, and with pregnant women and children.

 

There is no detox phase.   There is no "detox" happening at all; the human body does not operate that way.  You reacted that way because you have deprived your body of something that was significant enough to trigger a major shift in the evolution of Homo - cooked starches.  Meat played an important role in our evolution, but so did cooked starches - they simply happened at different times in our evolution.  The first bad phase passes only when your brain desperately tries to upregulate your serotonin or you begin allowing carbs back into your diet - whichever happens first.  

 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying swing to the other extreme end of the spectrum and start gobbling high-carb meals.  I'm just trying to say to be more careful about what you are doing with your body.  And implement high standards of evidence.


Edited by Duchykins, 12 March 2017 - 07:18 AM.


#23 不滅の

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Posted 19 March 2017 - 08:51 PM

​I was merely experimenting with the low-carb diet and it seemed to be a good mood stabilizer. Until it wasn't. But then again I went from clearing the pantry of snacks and pastries and sitting on my ass all day to keto and gym; one extreme to the other as I always do. I've since gravitated towards a low-GI whole-food and meat/fish diet that is rich in leafy greens and starch.

​Would it be a productive venture to test for histamine/other signs of inflammation? I've never done this before. What do I ask my GP if so? And if histamine is the culprit, what can be done to reduce it? This isn't the first time I heard of histamine and chronic inflammation being tied to my symptoms.


I wasn't planning on taking most of the above supplements long-term, with perhaps the exception of Fish Oil, Curcumin, Zinc and Vit C, but thanks for your input. Looking back I think I was desperate for anything that works without having a medical need for high doses.


And I'm taking 25mg of Zinc, not 250. lol



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#24 不滅の

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Posted 20 March 2017 - 12:17 AM

ps. I'll look into the alternative magnesium supplements. Would Magnesium as Taurate also supple the taurine?







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