I've been "suffering" from "social anxiety disorder" all my life - or so the psychologists would tell me. But the truth is that it never kept me from doing what I wanted to do - I just honestly don't care to do those things. My introverted personality is a part of who I am, and it made it possible for me to focus on my intellectual development a lot more rather than wasting time on other people. In fact I believe that introverted people tend to be intellectually, emotionally, and morally superior to the "social butterflies" who live for and through other people!
Your mind is trying to tell you something! Don't fall for collectivist pressure to conform! A person who seeks happiness through other people is building his house on top of quicksand. Drugging yourself stupid to overcome your inhibitions to conformity will not make you a better human being, only a more gullible one and easier for others to control. Wisdom, peace, and happiness can only come from within!
While you make some good points and have obviously learned to gain the most out of your personality type, I'm afraid you may be way off course on this one. I know many many people that are fairly extroverted, have many friends, and engage in social activities fairly often that are also very wise, intelligent, educated, empathic, and compassionate. I think you have missed out on something that can only enhance quality of life. Being co dependent is not a good thing, but being able to connect with people on an intimate level and form positive relationships is necessary for a truly fullfilling life. I think you may be in a bit of a state of denial in order to justify yourself and your life. Maybe I am misinterpreting some of what you are saying. Sorry if I am.
I agree, Alex says that he "believes that introverted people tend to be intellectually, emotionally, and morally superior to the "social butterflies"", yet if he rarely interacts with people, and has no close personal relationships his generalisation is based on nothing more then a delusional need to justify his behaviour to himself. Social anxiety is a disorder that results in an inability to interact with people without experiencing uncomfortable physical/emotional symptoms. It hardly has anything to do with what Alex effectively describes as social apathy, this is something else entirely and I would expect it is related to dysthymia or a less severe subclass of autism. There is a world of difference between a gregarious exhibitionist (or social butterfly), and the more typical socially active individual.
It is healthy to have social contact, it is the primary mechanism whereby we gain validation and moderation of our thoughts and actions. It is not a coincidence that individuals who eventually develop serious psychological disorders tend to be isolationist. I actually think it is cowardice to shy away from social contact by choice, because it primarily stems from a fear of rejection, rejection of your thoughts and ideas, and rejection of your physical self. Only those recreant misanthropes who wish to wallow in self-edifying intellectual masturbation truly make the conscious choice to shun society; I hope that is not the case with Alex.
I just wanted to put in my two cents worth of ranting and raving on this subject, as I am generally biased to amplifying the point of view that might otherwise be overlooked. I only besmirched "'social butterflies'
who live for and through other people" - if socialization is what fits your personal values then my criticism doesn't apply as much. So I'm not against people taking supplements or prescription medication against social anxiety disorder, I'd just encourage them to consider if that's really what they themselves want to do, as opposed to being pressured into it by others, which is very often the case.
Personally I was very sociable as a child and had a large number of friends, but I became more introverted as a teenager when I discovered computers, and through them the ability to learn new things on my own terms. (Immigration from Moscow to New Jersey also played some part in my introversion, but that's a separate discussion, and you can see that my English skills did not suffer from lack of direct socialization by much.) I wasn't shy or socially awkward at the last dozen parties I went to - I was simply bored out of my mind!
I think it is an inevitable consequence of intellectual progress to spend more of one's time processing written or prerecorded information, because that is the medium in which sophisticated information can be communicated, stored, searched, and recalled most efficiently. This inevitably leads to less time for IRL professional friendships, and various athletic and entertainment-related pursuits can also be more enjoyable individually, because as the realm of interest options expands the odds of you and your friends enjoying something on equal terms as you diminishes.
And don't knock "wallowing in self-edifying intellectual masturbation"- that's intellectual exploration of someone I love!
Edited by Alex Libman, 17 April 2010 - 12:30 AM.
