Hello All, I am new here and reading so much great information. I cannot wait to keep reading and taking notes.
I have this past year (maybe two) begun having mild physical PD symptoms however the physical side is still manageable for now. However within the same time frame my depression/apathy/anhedonia has just steadily gotten worse... Progressively just like these disease I suppose... I can literally think back to dates and times I felt great and then dates in between that I was off however some things still "moved me" to now where I am pretty numb to just about everything. My heart is still strongly attached to my children however even making them very happy hardly "moves me" I have no suicidal thoughts or anything like that it is just this very flat feeling that no song, winning lottery ticket, toy, car, house, emotional or action movie can seem alter. Sadness does come easy however...
So basically my reward system is obviously screwed up from my low of dopamine neurons... The question is if there is anything I can do to improve my condition? I have tried Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Mirapex and Vitamins of many varieties including Tyrosine, D, B12 and many of the obvious known mood improves...
Welbutrin almost helps a little however it increases my anxiety a bit and seems to cause my legs to burn and get tight... Triggering PD symptoms. Zoloft did nothing except make me lazy and ruined any sex drive that is left. I had hope in Mirapex however it made me feel very tired and almost just sickly as did Abilify... Alcohol which I drink very minimally takes a little edge off however its not any cherry on top or sustainable..
So if my reward circuitry is this bad is there anything left to try besides "acceptance"? When I first got my probable diagnosis I was saddened and determined there was a way to slow disease progression which is still a fight of mine and a topic for another post... However living without "feeling" is almost worse than progressively dying of any disease in my opinion. If I am to go down because of this I at least want to mentally enjoy my children, family and life that surrounds me, walking or not...
Any thoughts welcome!
