About a year ago after eating a couple grams of mushrooms I started to experience severe anhedonia and depression after not sleeping for three weeks from what I think was caused by heavy drug abuse in high school. I had never been diagnosed with adhd but frequently took any meds I could find to get through highschool while combining it with various amounts of pot, cigarettes , mdma, and alchohol. I started to notice myself changing and happiness fading away but was to caught up in everything to link it to drug abuse. Mushrooms made me realize this but also triggered my anhedonia. I can tell it if I drink large amounts of caffeine or sweet foods due to brain functioning, but just in general i have a hard time doing things like reading, keeping up a conversation, comprehending and thinking quickly ect.. Over time my perception of life kind of started to fade. After eating these mushrooms I started to have or realize my symptoms as I think they were exacerbated. My symptoms felt very strange at first but have become somewhat normalized as ive been this way for a long time and have a hard time remembering what things used to be like but some things i struggle with are:
Can't remember what I just did, Hard time remembering highschool, and childhood, Have no sense of how I feel or what I want, Feel like there is a hole in my head, Can't judge or make rational decisions, No motivation, When I try to read something I can't remember and have a hard time comprehending, lack of Awareness, Adrenal fatigue, Nervous system feels like it’s in high gear: jump whenever anyone enters the room, Can get good sleep, hard time falling asleep, Can’t react correctly or quick enough to situations, Careless/reckless actions, hard time making decisions and choices, Hard time sticking to job, school, routine No motivation, Can’t feel emotion, and Hard time explaining myself. For about a year I have been trying to recover with diet and exercise but have a hard time sticking to any routine. If I drink coffee which I’m very tempted to do everyday I’ll find myself up for days binging on junk food one thing after another behind the computer screen until I’m so stuffed I contemplate throwing up because I just can’t get satisfied. Getting drunk does not even feel good to me anymore. My doctor has supposedly referred me to a psych that specializes in younger people, although I’m weary about taking medicine as I feel it could hinder the healing process or make my situation worse. Lately i havent been able to stick to a good routine at all. I cant stop binge eating junk food and drinking coffee. I constantly feel i need some sort of stimulation or pleasure. Im having a hard time getting into see a doctor. Im not sure whether to begin trying nootropics or anti depressants. Which do you think would be more effective. Im considering trying the mr happy stack (uridine, dha, vit e, and a multi) and then adding choline in. I fear for taking meds as i may never get off of them. Ive also been told to try to carnivore diet. I just want to feel the world again and have my awareness back.
Has anyone else struggled with something similiar? any information, advice, or stories that you are able to provide would be greatly appreciated. Im ready to get out of this hole any way i can I just want my brain to function completely like it used to.
I was wondering whether carnivore or keto would be better to try and treat symptoms of anhedonia/depression similiar to what im having. Is there any reasearch saying one may be better? Anyone experience anything similiar? Im doing keto right now but find it hard to stick to.