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Semen Rention(SR) Benefits- Sexual Transmutation

sr-st(sexual transmutation)

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#1 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 04 January 2019 - 08:44 PM


    Since, their has been alot of interest been going on in relation to NOFAP, I decided I will document my journey, for anyone who seeks ancedotal knowledge. Keep in mind I don't really ascribe to the philosophy of Nofap I only ascribe to the outcomes of delayed gratification and a maximization of energy and focus which is what we all desire to create a maximization of success for us as the individual and on the individual level within both respective outcomes, is what we perpetually seek. I only recently discovered the concept of sexual transmutation from a very weird reddit thread of FORMER nofappers who explored deeper ideas of eastern philosophy which was of particular intrigue to me. I have done nofap in the past the longest was 100 days and Obviously, I did experience improved confidence, stamina, focus and attraction with women. Everything for me was much more effortless than it had ever been before and I DID nothing different at all. It was kind of like a stimulant like concerta but worse in some respects.  The idea behind SR( Semen rention) Is that you want to keep all your life juice inside your body and overtime your body will reabsorb the excess semen until it remanifests into improved cognitition apparently, this is the premise behind it. The result? You get hyper amount of energy which you may want to discharge if your a fucking idiot like I was for years, I battled porn and masterbation and always wanted to release it. Yet the goal is NOT to fuck a bitch, that is a means to an end. The thread discussed the concepts of energy how people are constantly wanting to steal your energy which makes sense. The longer I went on my streak the more women throw themselves at me, jobs were offered to me and I DID NOTHING DIFFERENT. I became more charismatic for whatever reason ect. This has been a SHARED ANCEDOTAL experience, so their must be something to this shared experiences that may be of interest to the longecity community. I believe we all are looking for advantages to get us ahead over stupid neurotypicals but that's just my hatred speaking now.  So the goal of sexual transmutation is to use your new found energy and to focus it towards a productive goal or outcome that will make you more successful and by doing so you become increasingly and proporitionally more successful overtime. For all those that seek to do nofap for women, you have it all wrong.   The point of sexual transmutation is to give you a competitive edge and become successful for YOURSELF and no one else. Most of the chicks that wanted me didn't really want me they wanted my energy or SR(Semen Retention). The day after I busted, we all know what happend. I was tired, fatigued and had lots of brain fog  in addition to my ADHD. I was uncertain, inconfident and obviously the chicks ignored me and people just treated me differently and I DID NOTHING different than bust. A few times,I had involuntary ejaculation and I played it off I STILL Had the same issue. I've been tracking this problem for over a year on a spreadsheet and my data holds up at least circumstantial for myself.  In conclusion, I will make, updates until I feel it's no longer useful anymore and see if this "sexual transmutation" is useful. Before, my old nofap sessions I did NOT trans-mutate my energy I was always obsessed with sex or to release but your goal isn't to release but to use it towards a productive end.

                                                     Finally, for all those that have SO's or GF's you don't have to give up sex to sexually transmute your energy although it might get rid of your benefits because you might watse your seminal fluids. The point of keeping your seminal fluids is to only ejaculate ONLY when you seek to procreate other than that there is NO Incentive at all for ejaculating because apparently men can orgasm without ejaculating which I wasn't aware of either apparently. So my goal is simple, I will not ever ejaculate ever again unless it's for children. Then I will transmute my sex energy towards a constructive goal and see if these cognitive enhancements have given me an edge over those fucking stupid NT(Neurotypicals). Most of those NT's are busting nuts on a habitual basis and believe it's fine to waste your SR benefits. It seems to be that SR benefits is kind of like a stock you invest in. The longer you deny yourself the more benefits you get over time. For those with GF's, you can do this thing called KAREEZA sex which will be the only sex I will ever use now frankly because it's superior to real sex. The concept, is that you have slow sex that basically doesn't arouse any form of orgasm or ejaculation, your basically focusing more on the intimacy connection which is oxytocin rather than dopaminerigic pleasure. Thus, it appears that those who reported karezza sex who DIDN'T ejaculate OR orgasm reported to "BE REFALLING" In love with there SO or GF like their honeymoon phase again. It's been warned you shouldn't do this type of sex unless you want to BE REALLY ATTACHED TO THEM.  Then their is this type of PIED sex which you can also do. Don't ask me what it stands for, the SR nerds invented the concept apparently. Basically you stimulate the head of your cock where you piss, it's a tiny area and once it's stimulated enough you orgasm without ejaculating. So your not constrained to slow sex with KAREZZA. So, you can have your SR benefits and fuck as much as you like. Which is pretty nice. Call me crazy but the concept of wasting your life-force makes ALOT of sense, when I used to fap for days, I was a depressed piece of shit and would DO nothing.  Only these streak periods, even now I'm on my new streak which will be permanent, I already have 3 jobs lined up and I barely even cared about it. My motivation has always increased significantly which is NOT COMMON for a person with ADHD-PI, normally I'd just abuse the fuck out of reddit and shit.  Above all, this makes sense that we should cherish these SR fluids instead of wasting it on  a wash cloth. We men need to be more intentional with how we use are fluids. It has the ability to MAKE life and it makes sense that I often feel emasculated when I waste it.  Now if you disagree, I don't give a fuck.  It's just my observation that many monks, nikola tesla and some famous figures, used it apparently to seek enlightenment and improved cognitive capacities, which has been a COMMON practice in some eastern philisophies for thousands of years. Finally, mastering and denying your sex drive as a man is the hardest motherfucking thing you can do.  As a man we are easily manipulated by visual images and thus we are susceptible to dopaminiergic manipulation.

 

                                                          In conclusion if you pursue these SR beneifts do not waste it on a one night stand with a bitch, it's a waste of time. The increased attraction your getting is NOT REAL ATTRACTION,those people who pretend to LIKE YOU DO NOT LIKE YOU.  You might be tempted to throw it away on a kiss or something stupid do not do this. I've fallen for this many of times, these individuals who are attracted to you are there for your ENERGY which is a higher energy state than there. Essentially there vampires especially among the chicks, those are NOT the ones you want to be around with anyways. You want one that likes you for yourself and values your holistic being not just transitory outcomes. From this revelation some SR nerds have even gone celibate for months on end just to continually accurue benefits. So above all this journey, isn't about external validation, it's not about women, it's about self-control, self-gratification and being able to transmute this energy towards a productive outcome that will BENEFIT you in the LONG RUN. If you do this for women your wasting your time,you might as well just go back to your video games.. THIS IS REALLY REALLY COMMON AND fucking stupid frankly.  I will report back soon.


Edited by DrewMichael21, 04 January 2019 - 08:51 PM.

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#2 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 06 January 2019 - 08:43 PM

 A brief update then, It'll be weekly, So I'm on day 10 at this point but have been doing nofap streaks everytime I fail. So this time I've been exercizing my kegel muscles which is where you exercise the urethra where semen comes out and by definition it become strengthened overtime.   Along with sleeping on my back instead of my stomach also prevents any form of premature ejaculations, finally I encourage any individual who is pursuing this path of SR retention that you need to let go of all forms of sexualism until you reach a pinnacle plethora  of self-control and discipline. I've seen very minimal forms of any repulsiveness to the degree of sexualization, so I reccomend when you go on this journey you LET GO of all forms of nudity. Period. Otherwise you will merely create a instant gratification temptation that will limit you. What do I have to report so far on 10 days of SR ? So far, I feel a bit more confident and am a bit more focused I feel very relaxed yet assertive and I'm better able to follow conversations without getting bored as easy. Most of my other impulsive habits appear to be connected with my pornography addiction and obviously, ejaculation releases. So there, is that ofcourse. I've had no headaches or anything and it's MUCH EASIER, to do because I', WAY more motivated to not spill my life-force on stupid shit and focus on sexually transmuting this new energy towards a productive goal or outcome, which is ABSOLUTELY important for your long term SR retention. Also, it's important that YOU DO not fall for this new female attraction AT ALL, they are NOT attracted to you they attracted to your energy. Finally you need to realize, that SR is NOT for female attraction nor sex, these are meaningless concepts. The goal is to do IT FOR YOU and FOR YOUR OWN SUCCESS and no one else's. Anything less is a FAILURE. Do NOT waste your life FORCE ON SEX, I must repeat this enough DO NOT WASTE WEEKS of your SR on a random chick, this incredibly fucking stupid. Unless your disciplined enough to have karreeza sex then don't even waste your time. I feel I have a bit of a degree of more energy and I still abused information binges still but this is mostly because I don't really have anything good to do yet. Also REMEMBER most SR benefits will RAMP up around the 30 DAY Mark. DAY 7 your confidence and cockyiness will PEAK and you will go to a lower level afterwards. 

                             I would SAY it's VERY IMPORTANT you practice KEGELS, so you can prevent any LEAKING semen from your body, sense doing kegels and following those SR nerds, their advice has worked very very well. Also make sure your not stimulating your nuts, or head of penis with ANY CARESSING because this will just be another form of implicit temptation. Do I have anything else noticeable? Not really, I'm still pretty skeptical but most of the effects are very subtle as far as I can tell. Now, that i'm not FOCUSED on chasing the sex or anything but instead focus on sexual transmutation my focus and calmness is WAY higher then it normally is to say the least. Next, I've been avoiding you tube because of all the disgusting filth you will find on it. So this is another tendency I've noticed, is that you will increasingly revile what is immoral and repulsive that it would further strengthen your drive. Above all, perhaps your social skills may improve a bit within the listening context and you might be less emotionally reactive even though I haven't take my ADHD,medication because I'm working on getting a new prescription as we speak. It's still continuing to snow and Moscow and I'm getting very tired of it but that is something else entirely. Finally, be aware of the excessively attractive girls who tempt  you or overly touchy this is VERY VERY COMMON, avoid and ignore them like the plague. These are what I call the energy vampires who want your energy. They will LIKE YOU FOR NO REASON even before that they ignored you. Don't waste your energy meandering in useless conversations, also about people you don't give a fuck about. You may also notice, you have more charisma and your louder than you normally, are which I noticed today at church. Keep in MIND i was NOT, actively thinking about SR or anything it just happend for NO reason. I sang WAAY louder and lead the chorus which I've never done ever. So, there are some nuances that you will notice. That's it for now, remember SEX=instant gratification, if so ONLY KAREEZA sex or PIED sex with NO EJACULATION. My final realization is I'm becoming more intentional with myself, like with ejaculating. Ejaculation is for MAKING kids AND NOTHING ELSE. So this seems to be carrying over in other aspects of my life frankly. Above all, it's important to remember that we do this journey for the sake of the journey,  rather than a defined outcome. If you are incapable of controlling your cock then you will not control thyself. This is the purest philosophy of SR, controlling yourself for a longer outcome anything less is meaningless.


Edited by DrewMichael21, 06 January 2019 - 09:24 PM.

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#3 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 10 January 2019 - 04:54 AM

 Day 13: This is an early update from my weekly post but I want to illustrate to you the usefulness of SR(Semen retention), the benefits are fucking stupid. It will make you never want sex or masterbation again. I don't care if you think it's pseudoscience or not, those SR nerds have definietly got something good going on here and I want my piece of the pie. Today, I've started sexually transmuting my energy, I went dancing, I went to all my classes, and I did my routine I talk to a girl I like but she has been friendzoning me for ages. They even offered me the advanced class IN DANCE, WHICH I NEVER GET. I've been wanting that shit for months but they would always flag me off like a nobody.  My charisma was fucking rediculious people came to ME  and asked what i THOUGHT I had the fucking power and control and they knew it. Some faggot fat boy who I hate hugged the girl I liked and challenged me and I destroyed him and he backed of like he was mad. My mind is more clear and my intellectual eloquence has skyrockted. I even ignored these annoying white chicks who I hate and they CAME TO ME and wanted ME TO COMEBACK, when they KNOW I don't LIKE THEM. I hate most of the people in the group, I mostly just come for the dancing and that is ALL. I talked to emily for a long ass time and cussed and what not discussed my interests while SHE FOLLOWED, I dictated everything. She wanted to pretend like she was valuable because she implied she wouldn't be able to go there often. As she anticipated like she thought I would get my hopes up LIKE FUCKING NICE GUY.  I told her I didn't give a fuck and I don't. I did NOTHING differently AT ALL.I repeat this. My confidence was disgusting, it's the type of confidence I had in spurts on NOFAP but wasn't consistent because I didn't sexually transmute the energy. I could actually focus on the conversation instead about fucking her. Hell, I was so charismatic She FOLLOWED ME OUT THE DOOR and almost to my car and then WHEN I ASKED HER TO HANG OUT SHE REFUSED, and then implied like we should hang out. I've been doing alot of KEGELS and strenghthening my urethra so no semen ever comes out ever again. I do 15 kegels a day. I then ENDED the conversation and left, while she was in mid SENTENCE as if she wanted to keep talking to me. Like I said, we men have it all wrong. You chase sex as if it's your only objective for the purpose of ejaculating and getting high, I don't don't give a fuck about sex anymore. You guys need to quit chasing sex, it's a meaningless concept.

 

                                      When you chase sex your chasing a high and an image of what you believe you want. Those SR nerds are right, sex is meant for reproduction and not pleasure and even if it is why would you waste these amazing benefits for one day of sex and then feel like shit? It doesn't make sense to me. Sexual transmutation seems to be fairly useful, sense most things appear to be going my way effortlessly without me even doing anything. I have bitches throw themselves at me like a desperate cat. The point is if you go on this journey, you need to realize they are NOT your friends. I had to girls come to me and I TURNED THEM DOWN. Like they turned me down when I asked before. They are energy vampires and they want YOUR ENERGY so you can go BACK TO THE WAY YOU WERE BEFORE.  Like, it's not even funny some of these chicks wouldn't even give me the time of day and it's disgustingly different it's almost painful.  I get job offers WAY EASIER and my charisma allows me to things I could never do before. It's a shame SR isn't permanent because I could do amazing things. Remember the PURPOSE is SEXUAL TRANSMUTATION you need to transmute this energy or it will build up and you will get angry. YOU DON'T USE IT FOR SEX. I repeat don't fucking waste it on something stupid. Emily wasn't really attracted to me. She was ATTRACTED TO THE IMAGE OF ME. I asked her out on a date twice before and she turned me down even though I'm objectively superior to HER in almost everyway. Yet, she could still dictate the energy. I'm not a misogynist AND I'm not any of that PUA, I believe in discipline and self-improvement for it's own sake. Once you let go of sex, you will free yourself from the only thing that is oppressing you. How much time do you waste on hardcore pornography and eyefucking a bitch? I would estimate I spent HUNDREDS of HOURS and FACED REJECTION because I was a nice guy. The point is, once you master your only weakness which is your sexdrive you can sexually transmute at will to ANYTHING you want. The purpose of a relationship isn't sex. It's to have a companion and somebody who you enjoy being with.  Sex and ejaculation is for procreation purposes only and when you UNDERSTAND this, you become IN CONTROL AND Intentional. You have delayed your graitification and you gave finally realized, that there is more to life than chasing a HIGH. This is what I've done all my life. I WANTED TO GET HIGH, TO FEEL PLEASURE. Yet pleasure is a worthless concept if you are incapable of BEING INTENTIONAL and delaying it.

                                     Objectively, guys if you can effectively transmute this energy and your a privileged NT(Neurotypical) you will be WAAY ahead everyone else. I even got my license which I've been procrastinating months on and yesterday I got it effortlessly. You will not get mad as much anymore and your confidence will make you enjoy life much more. I really have to emphasize this guys, Stop obsessing over sex, stop being controlled. We are more than sex, sex is like a shot of heroin there really is no difference. Everytime I ever ejaculated I felt like dogshit for about the entire day. Keep in mind, I have ADHD and NOT ON MEDS yet, and my motivation has skyrockted like never before, which is nice. I refused to even take a nap when I thought I was going to. Do not be cocky with these abilities you must use it well or it will be wasted. Don't fall for the bullshit of these fake friends your getting they don't LIKE YOU and don't give a FUCK ABOUT YOU. Neither do those women. Your essentially a pool of energy and EVERYONE wants ENERGY, so they can steal it for themselves. That's why positive people and confident people command more attention because they are wells of energy that losers can draw on because they have nothing of value going on in there own life, so they seek validation to make themselves feel better. I had only ONE FRIEND who stood by me when I did ejac and he liked me for MY PERSONALITY and NOT my energy. He liked me for who I was. These are the PEOPLE YOU WANT in your life. They actually care about you and won't drop you like an expendable piece of shit. This is the same rule for a girl. Find a girl who likes YOU for YOU and not your SR benefits and you will go far. I can better able see the fake motherfuckers from the real people. I personally, only hang out with ND(nerudivergent) individuals and NOT NT'S. So once you understand, that they don't give a fuck about you and JUST WANT YOUR ENERGY. You MUST block them and ignore them, they are meaningless to you. Girls, you don't give a fuck about either. Sex don't mean shit. Now you can transmute your energy towards your goals and people will get angry that your finally becoming successful. Now you can say this is all in my head, but these are just the observations I've noticed overtime. Another example, is the TEMPTATION PROBLEM is what I call it. Like in dance today, women were being way more sexually active towards me while before that I was INVISIBLE. These girls I've been dancing with FOR MONTHS. So, nothing changed and hell I've lost a bit of muscle to. Basically, the idea is they will tempt you with attraction so they feed off your benefits and throw you away like trash. Is what I've noticed, they become touchy feely and all this bullshit, I immediately FRIENDZONED THEM. LOL I've never done until now because I see what's happening. Infact, I don't even want sex anymore. The SR is real as far as I can tell and it's only day 13. I recall in san Jose at day 33 I had 4 of the hottest girls openly invite me to there sorrority house and I was on medication. I was jacked as fuck and turned them down but they wanted me so badly. The moral of SR, is that delay-gratification and self-mastery is the true key to happiness and not chasing petty pleasures of the flesh. Perhaps, celibacy isn't all bad if you know HOW TO USE IT. So SR and ST that shit towards your glory and do IT FOR YOU. I wanted to report, this because it was disgusting how much changed. That is all. 


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#4 Bubbles

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Posted 14 January 2019 - 05:47 PM

Good luck with your journey, I am familiar with this for good reasons  :-D

 

Also check out this legendary thread, I am sure it will help you, it is long, but worth. https://www.nofap.co...-remedy.135983/ No meaning to hijack your thread, I know you will continue with your reports. 

 

Quick advice, please try to include a tl;dr short paragraph in each post of yours summarizing the post itself, some of us would like to read but don't have the tie or patience, and we leave with an unsatisfied curiosity.  :happy:



#5 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 17 January 2019 - 05:37 AM

      1/16/2018:       1. So bubbles, I will definietly check out and follow through upon the investigations of NOFAP but I believe it's inferior to the SR community in almost everyway because SR nerds do the SR for THEMSELVES and NOT for chasing women. This is what true self-control is all about and it's being able to selectively choose what you want to do and why. I've heard this comment very often that my posts are very long so I will implement the TLDR section so hopefully, that my threads are more comprehensible. Normally I write many of my posts within a continious stream of conciousness, so it may lack the proper grammatical flow. Yet, then again I'm not exactly being paid for this so in that respect I don't give a fuck. Anways, as I've promised I intend to update this thread today on my current 7 day experience, I believe this is day 19 and what changed my perspective to taking this seriously, is that I want my fucking SR benefits so I can transmute my way over an advantage over the NT(Neurotypicals). Which is why, I may become permanently celibate until I find a girl who I actually want to be with. So what has changed and what's going on in my life? Well, I'm currently taking 20 units which is the max you can take and most of my classes are significiantly harder than they were before. There are much more readings and the classes are all test based so getting a high GPA this semester will require a significant amount more effort than before. The changes of SR(Semen Retention) appear to be cumulative and the immediate effects disappeared around day 11, now it's more subtle aggression and anger which I'm constantly experiencing which seems to implicate that I'm not TR(Transmuting). So is it pseudoscience or not?

 

                                2.  Well my experience, over the last couple of days my productivity has been more concise and linear within it's progression, but it hasn't been AS noticeable as it was during the first 11 days. So there appears to be issues of diminishing return which I wasn't really surprised by. My ambition to workout again has increased so much so, that I'm more of a self-starter and better able to see the distinctions in what I want and I now am focusing on being more intentional with myself instead of procrastinating which is what I do not because I want but most because the effects of ADHD-PI make the attendance of boring tasks displeasuring and torture towards my soul. In relation to women, my perspective has changed, I'm not doing SR for women anymore and it shows in my intestinal fortitude to NOT relapse again. I don't want to be mentally violated and give up my LF(Lifeforce).  To me it makes much more sense then what I doing it before. Before, I did it because I wanted a GF and wanted to fuck and this is the SAME thing as chasing my addictions that we have been chasing all our lives. I believe many men are addicted to women almost to the point that it's downright unhealthy.  Obviously, I still am attracted to women but I'm finally in control of my sex drive and the last 7 to 8 days have been  very easy for me because I'm focusing more on transmuting and not on the fake subtle effects of friendlyiness. 

 

                               3.  Most people seem to realize my new inner aggresion and it almost appears as if they somehow know I'm more guarded with how I approach everything. I'm more guarded in the respect, that I don't waste my time on most people. I don't fall for the stupid flirty shit that girls typically will do with me, when I go on these streaks and they seem to somehow to know this even without me communicating it which I find rather amusing and further proof that the VIBE or NV(Non-verbal) cues play a significant more amount of your message than your verbal.  They sometimes, smile but I simply outright ignore them and focus on my goals and outcomes so that I can further TR(Transmute) my energy towards my fucking glory and destory the NT(Neurotypicals). I've become more self- assured of my superiority over NT's. Oh and I've also realized, I've very narccisstic and despise other people who are more successful than me. Yet, SR has revealed to me my TRUE competitive TYPE-A personality that I SHOULD be and not this lazy piece of shit personality caused by ADHD.  It's hard to realize surmize what's happening. My cock is really sensitive but I've been practicing kegels and it's STOPPED all involuntary ejaculations which is the issue I had last time. I've been doing 40 kegels a day and it stops me from leaking urine as well which is a god send.  I have significantly more control of my urethra than what I had before. As in relation towards, goals it's hard to tell, I've discounted my rent and getting some welfare to pay for my eletric, I have no income coming it because it's simply not possible to get a high gpa without sacrificing some quality with work. My so called charisma seems gone and I'm just very aggressive as If I want to fight people and my sense of humor is gone. Everything in Moscow, Idaho is very quiet and I hate it. Everything is very slow and measured.

                                4.  Is SR real? I say yes because today i worked for 5 hours straight on MATH, which I hate and FINISHED it from start to finish which is unheard of for me. Normally I get Horrible  backpain and get up alot and get into frustration very easily because focus doesn't come to me. Again, not eating food seems to increase my IQ by about 10 points so fasting also might be something worth investigating into. When I eat my focus is DESTROYED, so their might be something in food that could be effecting me, I don't know. So I may get tested for allergies. I have no desire to  fuck a girl at all and only want a companion now. SR makes you keenly aware of yourself more so than before. You become aggressive, impatient, more censoring and less tolerant. I tolerate less bullshit and censor more people. I've cutt ties with 5 vampires which I identified what they were doing. They were stealing my SR energy and were basically feeding off me when I thought they liked me for me which they didn't. So I don't have much to report. 

 

                                 5. Conclusion: I've had a significant aggression increase and my ability to focus has improved to a moderate degree it's hard to attribute to SR or NOT eating, this remains unclear. My ability to get to what I want seems to have improved to a good degree. My tangent thoughts appear to go away a little bit. My mind is very focused and straight forward and very determined to KEEP my SR benefits and I'm very hungry to improve my life circumstance. I still have no friends in moscow and I miss my old friends. I have no real female attraction after the testosterone BOOST period, it's hard to quantify really. Ever sense, I've realized women have been seeking to steal my energy I now censor them so take that with a grain of salt. Everything is very quiet and very slow as of now. All I can say, is if you go on the SR journey, you need to do it FOR YOU. You need to realize, that SR is a process and not a destination. I barely even comprehend SR and the concept of self-control and I've been working on self-mastery for ages and still fucking suck at it. Which I could attribute to ADHD. I'm very unhappy with my UNIVERSITY and my lack of friends. The loneliness takes it's toll on you after a while when you don't get any real relationships, it's a very isolated area, I'm also a hyper introvert so it's effecting me more than I anticipated. Some days, I'm inhuman other days it appears as if it's placebo I do feel cleaner and more concise if you will. I feel more grounded and more aware of myself and assured. It's very subtle but very powerful. Is SR the end all BE ALL? I don't know but we will see where this journey takes me. All I know is I'm determined to make this permanent and not temporary any longer. For my fellow SR nerds, you MUST transmute or your energy will become toxic and you will go  into rage. So this will require significant challenge and determination to be able to do this consistently without faltering. Next, be AWARE and very aware of ejaculation vampires I call them, as I warned in my previous post these women are NOT attracted to you. I've had stupidly attracted women who would talk to me who before I was absolutely invisible and I did NOTHING different. They do not like YOU for you.  The attraction is superficial and nothing more. Also, you will experience yourself being challenged more by insecure pussies, I easily bully them sense I'm still strong as fuck. However, if your weak then hit the gym or you will be at war with these insecure beta males.Their probably chronic fappers, so there's that. I almost knocked a dude out for other reasons but you will be in situations you've never been in because you are a THREAT now. The women want to NEUTRALIZE you not all,women just the fake ones. Remember if your chasing pussy then your dependent and therefore weak. If your are dependent then you can be controlled. This is the real reason why they are pretending to be attracted to you. Now disagree with me if you want but these are the ancedotal patterns, I've noticed. When I did fall for this trap, I'd lose all attention and focus and feel like crap for weeks and feel more susceptible to instant-gratification. The very act of sex robs you of your energy and shouldn't be used lightly. Hence, why if your no longer powerful you are easy to control. Thus you will become needy and give women, all the attention they need.   This is why they want you DEPENDENT on them. They want you to stroke their ego. They want you eyefucking them. Their SELF-VALIDATION comes from your ATTENTION.  That is why they are PRETENDING to like you. It pisses them off your not eyefucking them. Your the one guy who isn't out of thousands of other guys. Surely, she must be the end all be all lady. She dislikes you ignoring her and wants you begging again. She loves beggars because it makes her feel powerful and in control. Yet, if your a real man, then you can withhold your ATTENTION and that will anger her because she has to be a WOMEN now and actually work for your ATTENTION. That is REAL REASON they want your SR energy. Is this all women? Absolutely, not just the fake ones who I should call girls. Women want you powerful and will build you up. Girls will use you to stroke their ego because they have no self-worth. This is very simply why bad-boys get what they want. They deny women their FOOD, which is attention. Without attention, a girls self-concept falls apart. Don't fall for offers for sex, ass, tits or anything. I've had all this come out of nowhere for no reason. It's all a TRAP. Don't believe me? Then go ahead and engage in your instant-gratification. If you believe SR is worth it then you WILL resist and refuse even SEX, yes SEX. When you can do that then you will be in control. This is what SR is ALL about. Anyways, I will continue updating if I feel there's something worth reporting.  /TLDR: More focus, Less distractions, everything is very quiet,  Ejaculation-Vampires, Beta-Males, More focus, ST(Sexual-Transmutation), Subtle benefits, more calmness, hard to ascertain, conclusion remains unclear etc. DENY YOURSELF ALL, Temptations for sex ect.

                            


Edited by DrewMichael21, 17 January 2019 - 05:58 AM.

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#6 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 20 January 2019 - 02:52 PM

01-20-2018 6:37 Pm:  I. I must say I'm really fucking angry that I lost my lifeforce to something as stupid as a wet-dream but nonetheless I failed. Obviously I did things a bit differently this time but made it to almost 22 days of pure retention which is very very hard to do. I will go ahead and elaborate to the novices here who will pursue this path. I don't believe that I was ST(Sexually transmuting) as much as I should have. Were the benefits real? Ofcourse, they were my charisma was skyrocketed and my ability to dictate was going well. My producitivity was a little higher and about the same on medication interestingly enough. So what caused this bullshit to occur? Well, my fucking stupid roomate was fucking his bitch, so it was hard to fight the impulse so I drowned it out with music but she moans like a whale which was really annoying.In other news, It feels like a perfect storm came to ruin me. Post ND(Nocturnal Ejaculation) I still currently feel very angry and full of alot of aggression I don't feel anywhere near as full anymore. So I probably am at ground 1 again. It's important that if you pursue this life, that your kryponite will be WT(Wet Dreams). These motherfuckers are insidious creatures and tempt you. Really, what WT dreams are is your brains subconcious desire to replicate your old thinking pattern sense your now challenging it and it's tempting you basically because  you subconsciously want smutt. So this is TRUE, I am fighting myself every moment to GET IN CONTROL of MYSELF is the key. ESPECIALLY if you were a chronic masterbator or watched copious amounts of smutt it's VERY INGRAINED within your mind, the last 3 days I  battled and STOPPED the dreams by consciously identifying the dreams. So this is what you need to do and what I need to improve on: 

                                               A. Sleep on your Back or SIDE, NO STOMACH ever

                                               B. Practice kegels

                                               C.  Make sure to NOT DRINK WATER BEFORE BED, WHICH IS WHAT I DID i KEPT going to the bathroom and waking up

                                               D. Avoid youtube and instagram, theirs alot of provokative pictures: Again it's very fucking hard but it's doable 

                                               E.  NO ASMR(Autonimious sensory Merdian response) I still watch this because it helps me sleep but I'm working on cutting this off it's just hard, I occasionally use it to help me relax but most of these women use ASMR with sexual undertones ALSO subtle forms of control, STOP watching this or even LISTENING on my previous streaks these motherfuckers caused WD like no tommorow,

                                              F. No eating or drinking 2 hours before and GO TO THE BATHROOM

                                              G. WEAR NO tight clothing and make sure your bed IS NOT, to warm being warm arouses you which you gotta be careful of

      

                                   2. Like I said it's really hard to discipline yourself but it's like a muscle the more you practice the better you will become and assuming your NT(Neurotypical). I'm fucking furious because this should have BEEN THE STREAK. Remember WD are NOT normal and don't act like it is. What's SUPPOSED to happen is your body will reabsorb that lifeforce and transmute it into improved cognitive ability and charm. Fortunately WD won't reset you totally but you lose a good deal of your transmuting power. I lose alot of my life-force today and it was wasted on an IMAGINARY image of PLEASURE. Really take this in, even a metaphysical image has this much power over me and I almost stopped it but woke up slightly too late. I won't make excuses and blame a perfect storm. It was my fault and my responsibility. Ultimately, you need to realize that WD is your own subconcious longing to go back to your addiction. I HAVE no intention nor will I succumb again to the reigns of fucking smut ever again. Your goal is to have your brain reabsorb it. Also I've been having leaking issues of urine which might be caused by excess ejaculations over the years due to a weak urethra. So their appears to be a real biological effect that it has on the body interestingly enough. You feel like an old man which isn't a good thing.  Finally, I've  successfully found a few girls that I like but NOT for SEX for companionship and I INTENTIONALLY choose the lesser attractive one. You must understand that you don't want SEX you want to make LOVE. Those are two different thing. Sex is a drug and love is not. Even then you should abstain from forms of sexual behavior with your spouse until they are at your level of sexual restraint and control. The purpose of seminai evolution is for PROCREATION and nothing else. I've also been able to orgasm in my own dreams and stop the dream from ejaculating and experience mental orgasm by seperating ejaculation. It's a repulsive feeling but I HAVE control of the DREAMS so  I brought them about on PURPOSE. You must let go of your old conception of yourself to make real progress. It's funny when I said I figured out the sex problem. Which I have figured out, I just need to retain indefinietly. Also, this girl that I like, I'm going to see if their attracted to my energy(vampires) or to your baseline-self. This is crucial, if they act differently then ignore them. Period. Do not build relationships off these superficialities. Remember even when you master SR you will have some episodes EVEN with all your planning. So I'll report on how that goes.

                                     3. TLDR: CONTROL YOURSELF, No water before bed,NO ASMR, SLEEP ON BACK,  WOMEN NO FAKE RELATIONSHIPS, Energy vampires, SEMEN Reabsorbtion, NO WD, NO TIGHT Clothing, KEGEL practice, ect. 

 

                          Note. I want to make one more Clarification: When you have non-intentional ejaculation fertilization you will always take a NET LOSS, which makes sense. We men are CREATORS and the girl is the receptor. Which probably explains why we get tired afterwards because it's a creation process. Remember that the dichotomy of both feminie is to caregive while masculine is to protect and to create. As masculine individual that you are your very being is creation. Finally, you need to realize that a man's greatest weakness is his cock and his weakness to visual imagery. Actively protect yourself from being mentally violated, when you take these two things away YOUR in the driver seat. That's why kings give millions of dollars for a single night with a chick. That's not a good trade now is it? I am NOT  a misogynist these are merely my observations. Above all, this is feminine and masculine nature at their core. I will make a post in 3 days to report on Post-streak Loss.


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#7 Bubbles

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Posted 20 January 2019 - 10:06 PM

      1/16/2018:       1. So bubbles, I will definitely check out and follow through upon the investigations of NOFAP but I believe it's inferior to the SR community in almost everyway because SR nerds do the SR for THEMSELVES and NOT for chasing women. This is what true self-control is all about and it's being able to selectively choose what you want to do and why.

 

Excuse me but you went ahead and preach to me the difference instead of using your time and actually check the link. That forum may be named nofap as it is the pioneer of the movement, and I do agree that SR practice is what actually even gives a large amount of benefits that the NF community claims to be (mistaklenly) coming from NF alone when instead it is the SR effect, but what I am saying here is that you did not checked the link, instead you just responded me to the name of the link. 

 

That thread, is a gift and a golden grail for you, I thought you would be amazed by the amount of information you would devour in there, but sadly enough you didn't look. It does take time to read, I'd recommend you print those pages, but if you can read, then read, but read it all. Here's an excerpt explaining what it is about: 

 

"...a guy that I’ve come across in the Chinese rebooting community. This guy (internet name 飞翔) has managed to stay clean for almost 7 years and counting. Furthermore, he has shared his experiences and continues to share them to this day (over 73 000 forum posts in one online forum alone). He has diligently studied many topics related to rebooting and has written extensively in this field. I discovered great value upon reading his material and felt compelled to share it with the English speaking community. Therefore I have started the project to translate his work into English. I will refer to this author as Soaring Eagle going forward which is similar to his Chinese pen name. The reason to why I find Soaring Eagle’s work compelling is because he approaches rebooting from two unique angles: TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) and Buddhism..."

 

I learn from this Chinese person how to stop the nocturnal emissions, want to know? See the answer in there. It is a bout a qigong movement, I did not thought much of it but I just tried it daily and guess what? No wet dream! That person knows what he is saying, so I recommend you jump on all those pages because it is not about NF, but SR to its best (well obviously NF included).

 

I've heard this comment very often that my posts are very long so I will implement the TLDR section so hopefully, that my threads are more comprehensible. Normally I write many of my posts within a continious stream of conciousness, so it may lack the proper grammatical flow. Yet, then again I'm not exactly being paid for this so in that respect I don't give a fuck.

 

Oh silly, this but can't you see? It is not that I ask you to do this for the comfort of the others. The asking comes from compassion as in you get interaction and feedback and conversation from other people. As in you are making posts and knowing that the next day when you wake up, someone out there might be replying to your thread, have an idea, a question, point out something, share a similar experience, ask an advice or give, you see? It is not about you not giving the fuck, it is about us giving the fuck (caring) about you. It's a pity you say these things. Use a multitude of paragraphs, press Enter button more often, don't make long walls, but you can still write as much as you would like to share. tl;dr will always help.

 

The changes of SR(Semen Retention) appear to be cumulative and the immediate effects disappeared around day 11, now it's more subtle aggression and anger which I'm constantly experiencing which seems to implicate that I'm not TR(Transmuting). So is it pseudoscience or not?

 

I am nofap 300+ days and SR 220+ days , must have been around 6 wet dreams each becoming more and more rare. The truth is that if you have a wet dream after let's say, 2 months, you won't feel weak, and if you do feel that way, you will recover right back up in a day. You definitely do not return to 0. However if you are just starting out and you have a wet dream within 2 weeks, well that may draw you back a bit but it will still be better than not doing SR at all. The aggression and anger you feel are aspects of the subconsciousness that is not yet quite on the same board with you regarding the decision of NF/SR but not limited to that, it's an entire symphony of reasons which I won't go into now; all you need to know is how to channel/transmute your energy properly, and the real answer, the best, is to throw yourself at it, dive into your own momentum, flow, do what you need to do. The moment you stop and go on googling how to transmute and read and lose time and ask left and right, those exact moments are part of failed transmutation. I was myself in the search of transmutation, talked to many people from various parts of the world of all ages and practices, in the end, I finally understood.

It can be a simple formula, if you do not spend the amount of SR energy that adds to your usual one, then this surplus of energy gets stuck in the body or in other words, circulates slower than it should, leading to fustration, anger, wet dreams etc. When you do SR, you have to be determined to go big on your life! Start doing things!
 

 In relation to women, my perspective has changed, I'm not doing SR for women anymore and it shows in my intestinal fortitude to NOT relapse again. I

 

This is excellent to read. Glad you think this way, you do SR for yourself, not for others!

 

Oh and I've also realized, I've very narccisstic and despise other people who are more successful than me.

 

Good, narcissism may mask a hidden powerful potential ability. In the past it used to be arrogance, but nowadays with social media and internet all people consider themselves smarter than they really are. 

 

 

 

Is SR real? I say yes because today i worked for 5 hours straight on MATH, which I hate and FINISHED it from start to finish which is unheard of for me.

 

I didn't know you are still wondering about it. I also realize you're on the beginning of your journeys. Keep going strong, you'll reach far if you don't let yourself down. You are part of the 1%.

 

 

 

DENY YOURSELF ALL, Temptations for sex ect.

 

It is not about denying, this is never the right way, as sooner or later you might rationalize into thinking on going to the old ways. What I propose is that you instead find peace with your choice. Find peace with your way and find peace with the way the other people are. Everyone has their own path. While they go on with their life, and you with yours, there is one difference left in the middle, which is that you carry the 'hatred' towards them. betamales, ej-vamires,silly girls, women, attention seekers, pretenders, sex addicts and so on. If you think about it, the world and all people you meet and see, they do not really exist where you see them, they all exist in your head, think of it as everyone has his own universe, does that make sense? Now in this context, why would you allow them to exist in your head? Why would you allow yourself to walk through the garden of your mind and have to feel all the negativity and repulse when seeing/observing/remembering about all these people? Instead, you can choose to really transmute the SR energy and focus on building your very own momentum, do whatever it is that you desire and achieve it. Do not wear the chains of emotions and thoughts caused by other people, do not judge them, let them be, find peace in ignorance, because in the end, in the very end, when you will be in your death bed and look back, you will see, that nothing really matters. Get them out of your head, don't overanalyze them, let them be, focus on finding your momentum, your own balance, your own pace. Do not waste your energy on them. SR energy is rocket fuel, a great amplifier for anything you do, if you procrastinate for example and do SR, you can become a master procrastinator. I wish you good luck in your journey, stay strong!


Edited by Bubbles, 20 January 2019 - 10:08 PM.

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#8 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 20 January 2019 - 10:29 PM

Excuse me but you went ahead and preach to me the difference instead of using your time and actually check the link. That forum may be named nofap as it is the pioneer of the movement, and I do agree that SR practice is what actually even gives a large amount of benefits that the NF community claims to be (mistaklenly) coming from NF alone when instead it is the SR effect, but what I am saying here is that you did not checked the link, instead you just responded me to the name of the link. 

 

That thread, is a gift and a golden grail for you, I thought you would be amazed by the amount of information you would devour in there, but sadly enough you didn't look. It does take time to read, I'd recommend you print those pages, but if you can read, then read, but read it all. Here's an excerpt explaining what it is about: 

 

"...a guy that I’ve come across in the Chinese rebooting community. This guy (internet name 飞翔) has managed to stay clean for almost 7 years and counting. Furthermore, he has shared his experiences and continues to share them to this day (over 73 000 forum posts in one online forum alone). He has diligently studied many topics related to rebooting and has written extensively in this field. I discovered great value upon reading his material and felt compelled to share it with the English speaking community. Therefore I have started the project to translate his work into English. I will refer to this author as Soaring Eagle going forward which is similar to his Chinese pen name. The reason to why I find Soaring Eagle’s work compelling is because he approaches rebooting from two unique angles: TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) and Buddhism..."

 

I learn from this Chinese person how to stop the nocturnal emissions, want to know? See the answer in there. It is a bout a qigong movement, I did not thought much of it but I just tried it daily and guess what? No wet dream! That person knows what he is saying, so I recommend you jump on all those pages because it is not about NF, but SR to its best (well obviously NF included).

 

 

Oh silly, this but can't you see? It is not that I ask you to do this for the comfort of the others. The asking comes from compassion as in you get interaction and feedback and conversation from other people. As in you are making posts and knowing that the next day when you wake up, someone out there might be replying to your thread, have an idea, a question, point out something, share a similar experience, ask an advice or give, you see? It is not about you not giving the fuck, it is about us giving the fuck (caring) about you. It's a pity you say these things. Use a multitude of paragraphs, press Enter button more often, don't make long walls, but you can still write as much as you would like to share. tl;dr will always help.

 

 

I am nofap 300+ days and SR 220+ days , must have been around 6 wet dreams each becoming more and more rare. The truth is that if you have a wet dream after let's say, 2 months, you won't feel weak, and if you do feel that way, you will recover right back up in a day. You definitely do not return to 0. However if you are just starting out and you have a wet dream within 2 weeks, well that may draw you back a bit but it will still be better than not doing SR at all. The aggression and anger you feel are aspects of the subconsciousness that is not yet quite on the same board with you regarding the decision of NF/SR but not limited to that, it's an entire symphony of reasons which I won't go into now; all you need to know is how to channel/transmute your energy properly, and the real answer, the best, is to throw yourself at it, dive into your own momentum, flow, do what you need to do. The moment you stop and go on googling how to transmute and read and lose time and ask left and right, those exact moments are part of failed transmutation. I was myself in the search of transmutation, talked to many people from various parts of the world of all ages and practices, in the end, I finally understood.

It can be a simple formula, if you do not spend the amount of SR energy that adds to your usual one, then this surplus of energy gets stuck in the body or in other words, circulates slower than it should, leading to fustration, anger, wet dreams etc. When you do SR, you have to be determined to go big on your life! Start doing things!
 

 

This is excellent to read. Glad you think this way, you do SR for yourself, not for others!

 

 

Good, narcissism may mask a hidden powerful potential ability. In the past it used to be arrogance, but nowadays with social media and internet all people consider themselves smarter than they really are. 

 

 

I didn't know you are still wondering about it. I also realize you're on the beginning of your journeys. Keep going strong, you'll reach far if you don't let yourself down. You are part of the 1%.

 

 

It is not about denying, this is never the right way, as sooner or later you might rationalize into thinking on going to the old ways. What I propose is that you instead find peace with your choice. Find peace with your way and find peace with the way the other people are. Everyone has their own path. While they go on with their life, and you with yours, there is one difference left in the middle, which is that you carry the 'hatred' towards them. betamales, ej-vamires,silly girls, women, attention seekers, pretenders, sex addicts and so on. If you think about it, the world and all people you meet and see, they do not really exist where you see them, they all exist in your head, think of it as everyone has his own universe, does that make sense? Now in this context, why would you allow them to exist in your head? Why would you allow yourself to walk through the garden of your mind and have to feel all the negativity and repulse when seeing/observing/remembering about all these people? Instead, you can choose to really transmute the SR energy and focus on building your very own momentum, do whatever it is that you desire and achieve it. Do not wear the chains of emotions and thoughts caused by other people, do not judge them, let them be, find peace in ignorance, because in the end, in the very end, when you will be in your death bed and look back, you will see, that nothing really matters. Get them out of your head, don't overanalyze them, let them be, focus on finding your momentum, your own balance, your own pace. Do not waste your energy on them. SR energy is rocket fuel, a great amplifier for anything you do, if you procrastinate for example and do SR, you can become a master procrastinator. I wish you good luck in your journey, stay strong!

                Hmm this is an interesting response. So obviously, the point of this thread is to prove to the longecity forum whether SR and sexual transmutation works, I'm expecting to be experimenting with this for over a year if not longer and I will report to them to see if their was any difference or if I increased my net worth. In relation to the anger and rage, your very correct I am full of rage abeit in a different manner. Next, most of this so-called overthinking and terminology I use is merely a by-product of ADHD. My adhd is NOT cured, with SR it seems to only improve some aspects of it. Other days I'm about the same. So yes, I don't really give a fuck about useless people. This is true. I care about your response because you seem measured so I gave a fuck about your response. There's a big difference. Obviously the TLDR thread is very useful. So yes, I do care alot about helping people as I'm sure your doing. So to be clear, I'm doing this for self-mastery so I can become a GOD. I really believe, if I was normal I would be disgustingly amazing. My goal is to ST(Sexually Transmute) my energy and with my medication to ACHIEVE AS MUCH as possible. I'm considering a vow to celibacy to even further increase my power of perception.  So I'm not doing this for enlightenment, I really do hate other people. I mean that to.  Am I wasting energy? Probably and I wouldn't disagree with you. I don't want peace, I want challenge and glory. I want to prove my SUPERIORITY because I am petty and narcisstic. Deep down I want to be the best. This is the REAL me that ADHD has stolen from me. The hidden personality that I've always wanted to unleash but could never sustain due to obviously chronically masterbating to hardcore pornography and other things. To answer your response more directly, the thoughts happen because I'm not in control of it, largely because of ADHD. If I could stop it I would have done that long ago.   So yes, I believe I'm very intelligent and high functioning? Am I perfect? No, But I should be perfect. Again I won't to far into the reasoning but My reasons for SR are very selfish and with a bit of justice sprinkled in. I don't know your reasons but you seem to be farther along. Also, I did read your link, I consider QIGONG  a pseudoscience but I've been taking pseudoscience more seriously, sense science is incapable of explaining how SR works OVER long distances.. I'm talking thousands of miles and things happen as if it was meant by god or the universe.  Anyways, most NFP are IG(instangratification) individuals who chase petty pleasures of the flesh for ego gain which is useless because SR is transitory and they use it IRRESPONSIBLY. It's my purpose to use it to guide myself to my goals and achieve all my AMBITION and more. I'm curious to your "reason"?  You might dislike this reason that's ok. Just remember I'm not doing this for enlightenment. I do find the kundalini intriguing though. 


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#9 Bubbles

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Posted 21 January 2019 - 02:16 PM

So obviously, the point of this thread is to prove to the longecity forum whether SR and sexual transmutation works 

 

My bad, didn't realized it was obvious what the point of this thread was, I thought it was more like a journal for your journey. Know that there is plenty of eastern mysticism associated with SR more than science, although you could choose to be indifferent and still see benefits. Personally I am far over the point of question of whether this is working or not, as I have been trying this on my self with success and fail quite a few times before I finally managed to go on a streak and find peace with my choice. Surely you can realize, that if (example, I) read countless threads, posts, videos, listen podcasts, read articles, books on the subject, from NF to SR and all that... and (I) get all this information, connecting a lot of dots, then to ask someone who never in his life even heard of NF or SR practice, someone who masturbates 3-5 times a week, what do you think his first thoughts will be like? It would be the same as some old buddhist monk would tell some teenager from Wisconsin to check his chakras. Makes all the sense for one and no sense for the other. With NF/SR, the thing is that people will quickly rationalize with reasons for why they should not do it; it's a pity, because the benefits would vastly surpass the quick orgasmic relief. I am not quite sure how many longecity members will really go that deep to go through all the posts, however I am sure that somewhere along the lines of time, there will be some people genuinely interested to go through your logs, even if that may happen many years from now.

 

I'm expecting to be experimenting with this for over a year if not longer and I will report to them to see if their was any difference or if I increased my net worth  

 

The thing is that it takes time until you stabilize yourself into this new lifestyle. For example, a smoker who quit ciggarets, he will not really experience the lift of a non-smoker in his first few months, quite the contrary, he will experience the life of constant withdrawals, although psychical withdrawals from nicotine may last 2-4 weeks, the mental can persist, even years, although diminishing in intensity. Plus, there are many triggers for the smoker, say he quit cigs, but many times after a meal he'll think about smoking, after sex, when he is bored, when he is excited, talking in a social circle, when is angry, too sleepy, too stressed and so on. Basically, the person that stops smoking, now needs to re-learn the old ways (surely you know about neuronal connections, triggers, habits and all that). Eventually, if successful, the smoker that stops for good, will become alike a non smoker, although for some there will always be deep down a small desire to relapse due to all sorts of "rational" thoughts, it can be controlled. Same with nofap and especially semen retention When I first indulged into these around 3 years ago, I had streaks of only 2-6 weeks at most, always falling in traps, peaking or whatever ways I was rationalizing(scamming myself) into relapsing. Feelings of anger, frustrations and anything you can think of; sure there were benefits too. Eventually, as time passed, I learned myself more, and learned more about this subject. I could say this in a thousand ways and there's no need, because I am sure you understand where I am going with this. To put it in a metaphor, it is like after some time, you can tame this type of energy and channel it however you like without side effects = translating as: you can be very balanced, calm yet focused, absolute no brain-fog, very productive, intelligence increase, energetic as if you were a teen, with no feelings of anger or frustration, most importantly, depression is lifted (but you see, how could you tell a depressed person who ever even heard of NF/SR that abstaining from him little pleasure it will make his depression go away? you can't, because he will tell you to piss off and call you crazy. try to help yourself more, care about the rest less, unless they also genuinely want your help); you realize that your time is essential as you cannot buy time and your energy is something you can now spend wisely, instead of mindlessly throwing it away at things that do not really matter.
 

 Next, most of this so-called overthinking and terminology I use is merely a by-product of ADHD

 

I have overthinking too since many years, the thing is I managed to redirect this thinking into things that brings me $$$. It is amazing what an overthinking mind can do when it has the right focus that can bring you benefits. The problem is when you don't have anything to do and you have an overthinking mind, that's when the mind turns on itself, as in you start thinking about your life overanalyzing the shit out of it which won't really do you any good to do that all day, every day. In short, channel it, get yourself busy with something that gets you really excited. 

 

 

 I consider QIGONG  a pseudoscience

 

I do find the kundalini intriguing though.

 

 

qigong is basically drawing the energy from the "source" unto your body. kundalini is raising the energy from your body towards the "source". this is ultra-simplified. of course it is considered pseudoscience, anyone saying that never went deep into the subject to practice it himself with a teacher and so on. these are things that takes understanding and years. I am to a point where is amusing to me as I can clearly see why people can choose to dismiss these things while the others that practice them since years or all their life, do not even bother to explain it to westerners or such. I personally do not bother anymore, anyone can believe what he wants, there are so many of us believe what each wants, and there's so little time.

 

 

 I'm curious to your "reason"?

 

My reason is quite overall/general improving quality of life and improving skills, letting my potential manifest, obtaining more natural energy and mental clarity which mainly using for my work; however in the same time it for the health of my body (including mind). On SR going to the gym for me is like pressing turbo button on my body. Also, I am not doing this forever, for me these are periods, this one is the longer, however I do plan to indulge in flesh pleasures later on, the only difference is that I know better now and don't waste my semen daily or often. I know better not to go ape mode like some of the people I see around me, they claim proudly to have sex with their girlfriend on a daily basis, get drunk, eat crap foods, sleep poorly.. then I see their face, it is like something lacks in them, it is like they are empty. Many times they ask me to suggest me what to take for more energy, I tell them no matter what magic pill they take it will not fix the problem of overindulging. To get back to me, I will do SR on and off, NF always. For example maybe this summer I'll indulge in sex, maybe I won't, but as soon as I consider enough was enough, I get back to SR, and doing so is easy for me, not new, knowing how to say stop and not fall in same traps as the first time I tried it. My reasons are general, and it is not as high as yours, however I am glad with my blue print and methods, if that makes any sense.

 

 

You might dislike this reason

 

 

 

No, not at all. How am I to judge you. Who am I to be taken into consideration by you whether I care or not. It does not matter, it should not matter you, and as you said, "it's ok". That's great to hear. To explain myself better, I mean "no, not at all" as in I do not judge it one bit what your reasons are, I read it as data, I do not add judgement or emotion to it, or else my judgement would be clouded. Your life, your path, your million thoughts and emotions, all lead up to these reasons and choices you are making which is perfectly ok. And so, who am I, in this vast universe doctor strange to tell you whether your reasons are likable or not. If you think about about, as I said in the above post, everything that you see and feel is not in front of your eyes, but it exists in your head/mind. I do not exist here on the chair I feel, I exist in your head on a chair somewhere out there in the world. Everything you know, exists in your mind, and therefore, the universe you see, it is all in your mind. Since you are the one who has the power to hold and create, observe and change your very own universe, I guess, you could already say, that you are a God.



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#10 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 21 January 2019 - 05:25 PM

 Final response, So I do find QIGONG interesting and I may investigate into it but I did not dismiss it at all. I believe their are deeper spiritual energies within the universe that are beyond are own control SR in my view is proof of this. Keep in mind most of LONGECITY is based on science and evidence and my goal is to find evidence of these co-occurrences. So, obviously I will continue to investigate into the aspects of deeper philosophy and discipline until I become a god. I like to think of myself as Alexander the great. Which some  people might laugh at but I really believe my destiny is greatness.  I want to be superior to people in every-way, this is my ego speaking now. Similar to a Lion being surrounded by petty deer.  Unfortunately ADHD is my "limiter" that I believe was put in place to stop me from my real glory but that's more of a metaphysical conversation.


Edited by DrewMichael21, 21 January 2019 - 05:27 PM.

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#11 Bubbles

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Posted 23 January 2019 - 11:32 AM

Check this out: https://www.ncbi.nlm...es/PMC2775227/ Why is intelligence correlated with semen quality? Biochemical pathways common to sperm and neuron function and their vulnerability to pleiotropic mutations .  "We recently found positive correlations between human general intelligence and three key indices of semen quality, and........"

 

Both neurons and sperm have high concentrations of PUFA relative to other body tissues. Specifically, the long chain PUFAs docosahexaenoic acid [22:6(n-3)] (DHA) and arachidonic acid [20:4(n-6)] (AA) are the dominant essential fatty acid components of the brain. They are concentrated at synaptic terminals and play a central role in neurodevelopment function1 and maintenance. Crawford2 and Broadhurst3 described the high degree of evolutionary conservation of DHA and AA in the brains of land mammals, including humans. While AA is readily available in the land-based food chain, DHA is available largely from the marine food chain, suggesting that hominids probably evolved with access to seafood in addition to hunted land animals. 

 

edit note: AA in this context is arachidonic acid but due to LongeCity forum scripts is says in op-up the term Anti-Aging, surely most know this anyway.


Edited by Bubbles, 23 January 2019 - 11:34 AM.


#12 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 26 January 2019 - 02:19 AM

1-25-2019:   1.  I'm going to do a slight update here before I start on my quiz for calculus. So the question was simple, is their a causal reset to your benefits on WD(Wetdreams)? As from what I experienced, it seemed like in the middle I was still fairly driven but obviously not what I was on before my semen retention of 20 days. The simplest way to avoid wet dreams is to just stop looking at anything that might be indicative of your own sexual energy to be used towards forms of lust. I'm still working on this right now as we speak and am making great strides. This time around I'm fairly confident that I can make around 30 days if not longer because of my resolute and strong moral fiber to master thyself. Day 2 was awful, I felt withdrawn and depressed and I did lose about half of the benefits and effortlessness that happened with SR(Semen Retention). Day 3 to 5 I basically rebounded and got a huge rise and testoserone and I'm back to transmuting. I'm still working on getting up at 5 am everyday and am still failing at this. So this is the next aspect of my life, that I hope to permanently integrate into my life until I die. So, for those following this thread, your biggest issue will probably be WD(Wet Dreams). This is what you need to be on guard against the most. Get used to sleeping on your back and just don't focus on women too much and you should be good.  To be clear, I still felt Lethargic and didn't feel anywhere as good when I had lots of semen in my body being transmuted. I'm hoping when I get more advanced and really develop my good life structure with medication that I WILL go on a semen creation diet that hopefully further increases semen retention even more. I've heard the SR nerds talk about SR diets, so this could be useful at some point. If you have ADHD like me it's important you limit yourself and do the few things you have and do them really really well then do alot of shit really badly, you'll be much more satisfied.

                                

                               2.  When you do relapse or give in to your immorality you need to go on a strong diet and drink lots of water so that you can recover. This is what I sorta did and it seemed to shorten the length to where I felt like shit. So this is probably really important as well.  After this post, I will go back to once every week. What else do I have for you? What's new & what's not? Well, my charisma and charm have skyrocketed I can easily get what I want when I want the majority of the time. It seems that SR merely  increases your natural tendencies to a crazy extent. It's not alot but being able to consciously use ones charisma is a very nice tool to have. In relation to the girls, they still respond to me very well and are overly positive to the point of it being uncomfortable. I'd ask them, "Why are you so happy?, "Last time you saw me, you didn't want anything to do with me?." Then they will typically say that they don't know why which is utter bullshit. Lol. I'm starting to take these mysticisms much more seriously then what I previously did but I STILL have much more studying to do before I even comprehend what SR is all about. I'm still struggling to workout consistently like I did last year. I still stimulate my muscles with pullsups and push ups, so I haven't lost too much strenghth. I'm still amazingly cutt. I recommend for those men who believe in this, to not share this secret, let the worthy individuals find out about the power of sexual transmutation. I let one person in on the secret, he was a christian and he openly admitted his pornography addiction to me which was of no surprise. He got alot of my reasoning and seemed intrigued. I unintentionally indicated this. Do not share this with anyone, you want to use this towards your advantage against the stupid lambs and NT(neurotypicals) and use it towards your advantage. You have  a huge FUCKING advantage if your normal with SR. You will probably get even better results than I get. Remember all of Western society thinks it's ok to fuck as much as you want and to ejaculate and you DON'T. Your on the higher vibration level and you are in control. Most probably think I'm crazy and I'm happy you do. I want only the serious people to use this. One observation from studying SR reddits, is that many of these nerds are using it for ego boosts to make up for their own self-worth seems to be a ramphant trend. They will typically state that their doing it for spiritual reasons but it's mostly for women, attention. So really, their still slaves to their own sex drives they just don't know it yet. So what I do what I mean about withholding your SR responsibly? I mean that you should let go of the material possessions of women and instant-gratification. This is inclusive of your phone and all forms as well. Which I'm also working towards mastering but one thing at a time.  You must SR for yourself and towards a productive end.

 

                                        3. By using SR responsibly you will be able to get what you want WAY easier. It's as if the universe simply wants you to succeed while before you had to move heaven and the earth to only get a quarter of what you want. With SR, you get your cake AND get to eat it. That's right. Read that again.   So don't use it to get fake friends or fake girlfriends. Don't use it to get high paid jobs that won't value you, YOU after your energy is lost. Use it for something that will last the fluctuations of SR. SR takes a very long time to benefit and you will have a day where you lose life-force.I wish it was a permanent attribute but it's not unfortunately.  So, we get are cake first by working towards a long term goal, like financial security and when you have that money, then you can get any chick you want AFTER you accrued your wealth. Even start a business and then you CAN do what you like later on. Notice that this thinking uses the concepts of delay-gratification which is what we are sorely lacking within society. Surprisingly, it's been easy for me to stop cold turkey, because I see ejaculation as a significant event and have no interest in relapsing ever again. Notice, to be successful with SR you need to be aware of your PERSPECTIVE, and how you view your life-force. Before on nofap which is a stupid name now that I think about it, I was using SR irresponsibly and would get frustrated when I couldn't use it to FUCK.. Then I would think what's the point? Might as well PMO . This is the WRONG way to approach this. On a deeper level, SR teaches you that success is transitory and so are you. Your perceptions of people are temporary. Your materialist life, which i LOVE is also transitory. Remember that one day is only one day. It's like enlightenment ironically. To conclude, my motivation is to be a god and be the equivalent to Alexander the great. To achieve everything to demonstrate my superiority over NT(Neurotypicals).SR will amplify your hidden characteristics. I've always known I'm a narcissist and want to be better than everyone but SR truly showed me this. It also has amplified my amorality of other people. I really don't care about people. They are largely expendable to me. I say this not out of spite but for you to realize that SR amplifies your good and bad. So you must control it or you will find yourself in strange situations. 

 

                                  4. Final observation, is the concept of transitory nature of life. Everything grows and then dies. As you and I will someday. This is part of the egoism and non-ego death of the mind. This is why humans pursue immortality because they refuse to acknowledge their temporary nature.   This goes especially for women. I believe that everything that we have been told is all wrong. It's all been carefully designed to tell you false story's that you believe but simply aren't real. You shouldn't value a girl purely for superficiality. Within the same, respects that your own success is temporary. Do not invest in beauty it's not  a good investment. Which is similar to investing in fake friends and girl-friends who like you for only your energy. it's like being rich but rich of energy. They will only stay for as long as it's convenient for them. So, the point of a lifepartner is NOT sex at all. This is the biggest lie people of have told you. I don't give a shit what your argument is. Think about it. If you use this dichotomy then it's equivalent to a drug addict/drug dealer. This is why objectification is so pervasive among the feminine. Your goal is love only to the extent that you need to bond. This is consenual love making and NOT sex. Your not here to "get-off" , your here for bond. Get-off is the same as getting high or drunk. Their is no difference. So for those that pursue this path, you should find, a lifepartner that complements YOUR personality and builds you UP. In fact, I encourage you to be pick a below average attractive girl and show her, her own INTERNAL BEAUTY. It's often these chicks that have the BEST personality and most attractive. A great example is Elliot Hulse's wife. He was a youtuber I used to follow before I outgrew him.  He INTENTIONALLY picked a girl not as externally attractive and would get a lot of flack for it. Yet, you get see her improve herself and WATCH her beauty develop. These are the relationships that last, while superficiality does NOT. Another example, was me dancing two weeks ago I REFUSED to dance with an attractive girl because she indicated to me her own entitledness. She thought, I had to dance with her and treated alot of the guys rather poorly. She WALKED out of a dance with another unfortunate nice guy, because he messed up on a couple of steps. This is TABOO to do in the dance floor. You should NEVER EVER walk off in mid dance. So I promptly refused and choose a less attractive girl. She was furious with me lol... Then I got the other chicks number to PROVE a POINT. Granted I did nothing with it because I don't care for it. The SR individual who pursues a superficiality believes he's entitled, while an SR individual who pursues believes he has to WORK for his success. Take your pick.

 

                                     TLDR/ Observations about SR, RESPONSIBLY USE SR/ ANCEDOTAL STORIES, CONSEUAL LOVE V Non-conseual Love, Getting OFF/Same as Heroin, Sr works very well just use it responsibly and don't waste it. WD(Wetdreams) don't reset you all the way. FIND lifepartner and not a SEXdealer, FIND REAL friends and not fake ones. ECT

 

                             P.S IF WESTERN SOCIETY, IS WRONG ABOUT THIS, THEN WHAT ELSE HAVE THEY TOLD US THAT IS A LIE? Introspect and examine all your BELIEFS you've been indoctorinated to BELIEVE. If they were wrong about something as simple as sex because of are own hubris to think we know all. Then it's POSSIBLE we are harboring MORE DEADLY habits and beliefs.


Edited by DrewMichael21, 26 January 2019 - 02:26 AM.

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#13 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 02 February 2019 - 05:59 PM

         2-2-2019

 

                              1. I will keep this rather brief, sense obviously their isn't much to report here anyways. I was hit by another wetdream on the 1/28/2019, so that ended that streak once again despite, my preparations on sleeping on my back  and side. My sleep yesterday was horrible I kept waking the whole entire night and could only sleep in bursts of 2/3 hours at the most. It's probably because my phone usage is still out of control so obviously, I need to get that in control at some point. So I'm currently on day 7 again and interestingly enough I've felt absolutely nothing except a minor migraine. Most of the benefits of the first streak I did which was on medication made it significantly easier to get to my much longer streaks interestingly enough. Doing it off medication seems to be harder for whatever reason. It's also interesting that I'm still very leaky and when I sleep it's as if my semen rises up from urethra and I'm NOT doing it, so I have to stay awake most of the night to keep it down where it belongs. It's probably because of ASMR which most has sexual undertones, so I'm playing with fire. Yet, it's very useful for getting me to sleep otherwise I stay up for another hour waiting for sleep which I hate. That also didn't work either interestingly enough. I'm going to be tested for food allergies very soon because my mild to moderate ADHD becomes extreme when I eat bad food. Yesterday i got nothing done and was incredibly impulsive when normally In follow my rules.

 

                            2. It's important to note, that most of my benefits on day 8 started to increase over-time and it seems medication gives me the ability to be able to suppress and control myself much better than what I would be able to normally do, which is very interesting. I need to signficiantly increase my food intake BY ALOT but I also need to focus, so I don't know if I have a food allergy. Interestingly enough, I experienced something similar in SJSU I just never made the connection between my foggy thought process. In other news, what else is different or do I have to report? I really don't have anything to really say, I'm wondering if sexual transmutation is just placebo it's really really hard to tell now.  Again that charismatic confidence and incredible charm or charisma was once I hit the 23 day mark is when everything seems to really get magnetic, so I suspect it's around this point when your SR benefits really accurue. My longest streak was 46 days pure semen retention and this is when shit gets crazy. If I recall correctly it was early in august of 2018. Is when I said fuck it had had a relapse because I was so irritable but I felt cured and no longer felt the need to relapse. During those days, I had a choice of any chick I wanted and obviously was doing some very fun things and what not. I never really recovered after that loss interestingly enough. Interestingly enough that streak was started as summer CA on medication but didn't save me from the fate I experienced when I yelled at the co-worker and everything I loved was destroyed forever.  So who knows? It seems I've still largely lost everything sense san Jose ironically. I've lost a good deal of muscle but have still managed to maintain it to a moderate degree. I lost my paycheck, lost my network, lost my dance teams, lost my internship i had, lost everything. I still haven't come to terms with this even 7 months later. Moscow, Idaho feels more like exile to me than anything of intrigue. 

                            3.  In other news, SR can feel pretty empty at times so be prepared for this. It will make you especially aware of your own intimacy issues which I apparently slef-medicate with, using ASMR which is not healthy either. So it seems I have so many god awful habits, that I self-medicate like a motherfucker. SR is probably only the starting point of a deeper battle to find self-discipline? Do I have SP? No not yet, Has my GPA increased to that 4.0 with  20 units 1 internship and club? No, it doesn't seems to be flowing well. My gpa is probably 3.4ish right now, so I need to bring  this up more to maintain my scholarships. My classes are simply harder in general. Somedays, I have no motivation. Other days, I'm sick of doing math, so the first two weeks of SR don't SEEM to empower you. I really don't know. So I will report back at day 16 to have something more worthwhile to report. I feel basically emptiness but that's pretty standard. That is all. TLDR: NOTHING NEW, Just same old,WET DREAMS ARE ANNOYING, TBC


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#14 Bubbles

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Posted 04 February 2019 - 08:53 PM

Btw, I have found this post on reddit few hours ago, but was visible only on his profile:
 

My 12 years of nofap/semen retention/celibacy Chronicles

2018 : Still occasional nofap streaks of a week here and there but it was more for experimenting the differences about rejuvenation.

I am now sure that nofap and semen retention age the body and I had proofs for myself that I was looking older when on nofap and younger when on regular orgasms.

Achieving orgasms easily was still difficult in the beginning of the year for me but when I was trying I really felt and looked younger.

I made an experiment on a social/dating site with my phone. I took pictures of me after some weeks of more regular orgasms (maybe two to three per week) and healthy lifestyle (enough sleep etc.). I had still some wrinkles around the eyes of course but looked more relaxed and fresh.

So I wrote on my page that I was 18 years old for seeing if people could believe me... And to my surprise it worked ! Nobody thought I was in reality 33 years old... It was amazing. I had many likes on my page and many young girls were liking. I am not at ease on social media so the conversations with some girls were finally useless and I met nobody in real life but it gave me confirmation that orgasms can have a healing and rejuvenating power.

I spent the year experimenting and trying to understand well this phenomenon and found it worked anytime. Keeping semen and abstaining from orgasms make me looking older and not nice while having regular orgasms makes me looking younger and healthier.

The effects are not immediate of course, it takes at least one or two weeks of nofap or orgasms to see a difference in looking older or younger and it is only for those involved in regular semen retention for many years. The newbies and those who are in since less than 7 years will see no difference.

Also if one wants to look younger he must have good nights sleep.

It will not be noticed by young men of course but those over 30 and who have been in semen retention for years can surely feel the difference.

I think the reason why so many PMO addicts say they are looking unhealthy when masturbating is just because their energy is drained by too much stimulations from the internet and too much intellectual concerns and problems who cause the sexual energy to be more or less blocked or not properly released even with frequent ejaculations. The cause are nervous disorders but the nervous disorders are not caused by natural orgasms. See the Reich theories about that for more details if you want.

What really drains people on PMO is largely the fact to search constantly new videos about specific weird fetishes most of the time and to be only obsessed by that. They become neurotic and masturbate mechanically with the mind and body full of stress but their problems have in fact nothing to do with sexuality.

A lot of nervous energy is lost when we are surfing the web anxiously for searching and watching things, even if it is not pornographic. I spent entire days and nights searching and reading books and articles about spirituality and philosophy, watching clean and interesting videos on YouTube and was completely drained nonetheless, tired and feeling bad after those sessions anytime. We can binge and feel bad even with good content if we use it wrongly and waste time with it.

Masturbation and orgasms are natural and are not the problem. All is in the state of mind we have during masturbation.

It seems that men like Wilhelm Reich were right 100 years ago when they understood that the way the sexual energy is released or repressed influences all the personality and life of an individual.

Orgasms are healthy but only when make in good states of mind and with the good physical attitude (natural breathing, relaxation, spontaneity in moves and no repression or shame of any energetic manifestation who can come, like a need of making noises of pleasure...).

Concerning the loss of vitamins and minerals ejaculations can induce I tend to think that it is a mistake to believe it is so bad. The reason is that even if one can feel some gains in strength and other health effects while keeping semen it is more a nervous phenomenon caused by the strengthening of the self-will than a seminal effect.

Semen is not meant for being "transmuted" or "sublimated" or for "higher purposes". It is meant for being released through orgasms regularly since anyway a healthy body is constantly producing new cells and new semen. Keeping it by force is unnatural and go against the law of nature. Only problems can be the results of such practice.

The minerals, vitamins etc. in semen are useless for the body of the owner, like those found in his urine, because these minerals are normally for giving life to another body through reproduction. It is an energetic gift to the world, not a selfish matter one must keep for him in the body. Semen kept in the body will not transmute but will degenerate and prevent the normal renewal of the cells and the regular rejuvenation of the organism.

Keeping semen for too long is dangerous. And there are many other risks like cancer, hormonal disorders etc. Just think about the pain we feel when we have blueballs from abstinence... Many guys can't walk or move normally during these phases. Is it healthy ? Of course it is not. The body needs desperately to release this semen no matter when, how and why, and even if the conscious mind has wrong beliefs and wants to practice abstinence the body will finally release some sperm through a wet dream anyway. You can't fight against nature without being wrong.

Anyway, at the end of the year after masturbating more frequently for months I have been able to heal many things psychologically and physically, thanks to the rejuvenating power of good regular orgasms. The ED finally healed, my erections are now normal and healthy and I can orgasm easily again.

At the end of the year I was masturbating sometimes three times a day and every day, between some periods of rest where I had no special needs to masturbate but was absolutely not trying to do nofap.

I did it with my own imagination or soft images, girls on TV etc. But no need to use porn or too much stimulation anymore.

I was dreaming about sweet vaginal penetration and love most of the time while masturbating or just some other natural fantasies and fetishes I have, and sometimes I tried to not fantazised, just immerging myself into the feelings without thinking about something special, letting the thoughts coming and going as they want, as if in a relaxed and natural meditative state.

I never had such a good libido and feelings since my early teenage years.

I quit all beliefs and spiritual concerns and try to live freely, eating what I want when I am hungry with no rules and just following my intuition for everything.

I also quit reading books or any advice on the internet and my mind is free.

I have been alone this year again but I was not even searching for a girl anyway. So not too much frustrations. I enjoyed not searching for anything and just being myself.

2019 : in the beginning of the year I surprisingly relapsed in believing in nofap again although all the good things I have seen quitting that. Bad results and anxiety came back. Nofap belief is really the worst thing ever for me. It is always hidden somewhere in my mind ready to come back but I will always do my best for fighting this heresy when it comes and being free.

Now I want to share with you my story and experience and I hope it can be useful and interesting to some guys.

Honestly, I still don't know what the ultimate truth is. I don't know if I am right or wrong. I don't know how to help others. I don't have any advice to give because after all everybody has to choose what is good for him.

But all I know is that in my experience nofap is bad and extremely dangerous for mind and body. I regret everyday to have read and believed about semen retention. Nofap is like a mental disease I try to heal and it is difficult.

If some guys are like me I hope my testimony can help them to find the will to quit the slavery of nofap and other weird practices. I am still myself in a recovery process with occasional relapses and have many things to heal until I could say that I am normal again so I can't really help other people. All I can do is writing here what I feel and what I lived and if you have similar experiences just know that you are not alone and that we are all trying to heal our souls from the evil of wrong beliefs and slavery.

Now I will also quit all social media because I live better without being active on the internet, and reading and writing too much is exhausting for me.

So please don't send me messages and questions because I don't have the time and the energy to answer and I will not come to the forum before a while anyway.

I think I wrote almost everything I had to say here and people who really want to quit nofap or any wrong philosophy have to think by themselves for doing so. This is the first step to freedom.

I am just coming back today to write this as my definitive contribution to the nofap community who needs to know what happened to some of the veterans.

I think in the future many men who still think nofap and semen retention are good will understand one day what I am writing here and will understand that nofap and semen retention are bad after years of experience.

The reason why I wrote my message in english and not in french is because nofap is not popular in France so the majority of french people don't care and can't understand what I have to say. It is useless to talk about nofap to the French, they can't take it seriously anyway.

I am sorry if my writing style is bad and if I did some mistakes. English language is not easy to me. It is difficult sometimes to find the appropriate english words for expressing some of the things I have to say so it took me many hours (in fact it took me days) of work to write it.

Anyway thanks for reading and good luck.

dyionysusrex • [score hidden] •  submitted 1 hour ago

2016 : Always alternating between nofap streaks and normal life and always celibate I became more schizophrenic and bipolar than ever.

I started to crossdress again and was walking in town with make up and girl clothes and shoes I bought.

I thought that if no girls wanted to be with me I could be myself a kind of girlfriend for me, so I was wearing girl clothes for feeling like a girl presence in my life. I had like another personality when dressed as a girl. So I had three personalities : the nofap, the normal and the crossdresser/girl. And In fact while playing a girl this ideal girl had many personalities too... I was many different girls according to my mood and my clothes.

I started to have some soft homosexual desires for young and beautiful guys but ONLY during semen retention. When I had orgasms and ejaculations I was myself again, my mind was suddenly clear and I was disgusted by what I thought during semen retention.

That means nofap/semen retention was the cause of these abnormal thoughts and feelings to me. If I masturbate and have orgasms regularly I have only heterosexual desires and I don't want to wear girl clothes at all. I feel just normal and relaxed.

All those things were caused by frustration and abnormal efforts to keep semen for an illusory energetic transmutation who never came like expected.

I thought regularly over the years to go to the prostitutes (hookers) for having some concrete intercourse with a woman, but for a strange reason I was disgusted by this solution and never did it. I needed a woman who was really liking me and not just someone I have to pay for a work.

Also I was not going to nightclubs and parties where sex is easy because I hate going out during the night and generally there is too much male competition and aggressiveness in those places. I don't feel like dancing around many guys I don't know and who also want jealously the girls I would like to seduce.

So after searching new solutions I had an idea. And in summer during a nofap streak I once go to a swinging club (a libertine club) opened in the afternoon, where I had to be naked with many people who had intercourse freely. It was smelling sperm everywhere and there were homosexuals and heterosexual people. Most of the men had a big and large penis and I felt so small compared to them...

People there were almost all wearing tattoos, men and women.
I noticed later that many people who love tattoos are also involved in libertine clubs, acting in porn movies etc. It seems like the tattoos culture is linked to the libertine culture. This is strange.

One young straight guy who said he was a military talked friendly with me for a while but forgot all about me when a woman of maybe 50 years old he knew well came in the club and took him away for sucking his dick.

But no women wanted me though so it has been useless to go there for me.

It let me in a very sexual vibe though and I was finally interested to try a homosexual relation, since no women wanted me anyway, no matter how I tried to be interesting.

So some days later I was finally in a gay club where in 5 minutes in I met a young guy who said I was beautiful and we were soon together in a private room. Nothing happened though because I was finally disgusted and unable to have an erection but the guy was nice enough for not proposing or demanding sodomy or something hardcore. He understood my situation and why I was here and we were only talking friendly until I finally go back home.

This day I understood definitively that I am a pure straight guy even if women don't like me. I can be really excited sexually only by women.

So after that experience I cleared my mind quitting nofap and was back to normality...

Well...ok, not completely normal but I tried.

I spent the summer trying an experiment with pornography. I bought old movies/dvd and decided to watch a movie per day in the afternoon on tv screen. It meant one or two hours per day.

Since years of semen retention and excessive edging led me to erectile dysfonctions and difficulties to achieve orgasms easily (it took me sometimes hours to achieve ejaculation) I was in need of some help with pornography for having more regular orgasms and healing myself. It was a temporary healing process until it could be easier to me to orgasm fast naturally.

I used good old Italian porn movies, like the early Rocco Siffredi and Roberto Malone movies from the early 90's when they were not hardcore. It was not so bad and shocking than what we see now on the internet. People in these old movies show sweet feelings and sensuality, they kiss and love each other. Well, there is also a lot of sodomy/anal sex in these movies but this is not hardcore, just porn/eroticism so this is not shocking. At least I was able to tolerate watching that for a while and even enjoying that, even if I found vaginal sex scenes better (my main interest with the movies was to watch vaginas and beautiful women enjoying sex).

So it felt good to recover for some weeks my sexuality with that, even if I was not a fan of pornography in the beginning it helped for a while so in a way I am thankful there is still some pornography like that available.

I noticed that with regular orgasms (one or twice a day) while watching joyous and good quality pornography with eroticism I was more relaxed, happy and cool and more energetic at the same time.

And strange things happened like women looking at me in town and smiling (it never happened to me on nofap, NEVER...). Even my young neighbor who hated me so much was suddenly saying "hi" with a smile to me...

It seemed I had a glow and a magnetism like what nofapers talk about. But I had it doing exactly the reverse of nofap... How one can explain that ? It was so weird. But it was real. Even my mum noticed a positive change on me and felt I was in better health.

I also felt rejuvenated physically. I felt younger and actually looked younger. Less wrinkles around the eyes and a better complexion.

But after one month of this experiment, for a strange reason I relapsed in believing in nofap again and soon all the benefits of orgasms vanished and I felt again like an old celibate man trying to achieve some powers through semen retention...

And the war between my nofap personality and my real personality was going on... It was alternating for short periods but constantly until the end of the year.

That is when during a nofap streak I understood the energetic change nofap can cause. Abstinence and frustration were causing so much tensions around the anal zone that finally the sexual energy is blocked here and leads to the need of anal stimulation.

I call this phenomenon the "anal switch". It means that if the sexual energy is not properly released trough ejaculation by masturbation of sexual act it will one day or another be blocked around the anal zone and will find the anal way for trying to create an orgasm.

That is why passive gay men can ejaculate copious amounts of sperm during anal stimulation, because when the prostate is stimulated correctly through sodomy it can make an ejaculation and an orgasm even if the passive man has no erection.

So basically you can understand the ultimate danger of nofap and semen retention : becoming homosexual or obsessed by anal stimulation.

Believe it or not, this is a truth.

That is a truth only few people understand and it is only for those who have been involved in semen retention for many years.

Knowing that, you understand why so many monks in the Church history but even many Buddhists and Hindu monks and yogis were becoming homosexuals or sexual perverts after trying to be celibate. This is unnatural to be celibate and it leads to all kinds of perversions.

I don't mean homosexuality and sodomy are necessarily perversions but becoming homosexual or obsessed with sodomy because of energetic and physical changes due to forced celibacy and semen retention for years is certainly unnatural and is a perversion, yes.

And as usual, guess what ?... Still no women, no love and sexual relationship this year for me of course.

dyionysusrex • [score hidden] •  submitted 2 hours ago

2012 : Good year for me. I have been lucky sometimes and happier than the last years.

I have learnt many new and usefull things and was studying by myself English and other scholar things I needed to work on (please remember that English is not my natural language).

Of course, I was still under the spell of false beliefs and practices and I did many mistakes and bad things. Trying to keep semen retention was still torturing me and making me insane.

I started to read some messages of nofapers on Reddit and forums. The nofap community was really starting to grow. It was inspiring.

But personally I was in fact starting to give up more and more my interest for semen retention and my streaks were less and less regular.

At the end of the year I noticed the advancement of my aging process and my wrinkles and teeth seemed particularly bad.

I was in a happy mood though because the year has been good.

Oh, and of course, no women, no love or sexual relationship this year. As usual.

2013 : Strange year. Not bad but not so good as 2012.

I took many wrong decisions and risks all year long and it has been exhausting finally. Total mess.

But my energy level was surprisingly high and I had again regularly faith in pure semen retention, like in the beginning, before all the mistakes.

I felt strong needs of purity and love during this year and was very emotional, with sublime feelings. Some creativity came back.

I finally stopped sungazing and other dangerous or weird practices and tried to do semen retention with clean mind and behaviour. Back to the origins of the faith in purity. I had enough of all the junky excesses I indulged in the past while practicing semen retention, when I was wanting power or weird magical effects who never came.

I followed some people like Classic Obass on YouTube and it was inspiring and a motivation for a while.

But I was still in great doubt sometimes about what to do. What if nofap was just an hoax ? I can't waste my time with lies. I had so few benefits after all those years and so much pain... Why I was still believing that ? So one day I believed and the other I was in doubt and confusion, and things were going like that again and again...

2014 : I had to move in another house this year and it has been a rather unsatisfactory change. I had to pay monthly for this house and it was small. I felt not so free compared to the ancient house.

When I had to search for this new house I was in a strict and clean nofap streak and I thought it worked. I have been lucky. The owners have been immediately ok for letting me the house and said I was nice.

I am still sure that if I search and ask some owners while not on nofap it would be more difficult to be accepted for a rent since all I have for me for influencing people is my energy/aura. I have no money and no social advantages so when you are like that doing strict Nofap for a while can give a temporary luck and good vibes who can help to be respected, it is true.

But it is hard to do... And when you stop clean strict nofap you take the risk that people change their mind about you and stop respecting you. It is a vicious cycle.

It happened to me all the time.

Someone talks to me friendly out of nowhere on nofap but if I masturbate and have orgasm the following day the same person dislikes me for no reason.

Some people can respect me when on nofap but once I relapse they don't care about me. It seems that what was attracting them was the energy from nofap and not my real personality anyway so why so much efforts after all ?

It seems like energetic vampirism. Some people want the energy from nofapers like vampires because they need inconsciously this energy for them. They don't really care about the real individual.

In the end of the year I met a nice man in a library who talked to me and became in few days a good friend. He was constantly nice with me and wanted to see me almost everyday. I was on strict nofap (no edging etc.) at this time. But as soon as I relapsed things changed. It was not so nice as before and the friendship ended.

I was tired of this game because it happened many times during the year with many people.

I started seriously to plan to stop all nofap and semen retention streaks and just being normal again. It was too much frustrating. The benefits were never real benefits but turned to be problems. And don't talk about superpowers, that was completely a crazy lie according to my experience for years. I was just the most vulnerable and ordinary guy you can meet. In fact, I was still and definitely a loser. Nothing changed.

2014 was the year where I gave up some illusions and started to be real to myself again.

So at the end of the year I quit the internet completely at home and started progressively to quit my beliefs and practices. But I was still ejaculating not so often, maybe one or two times a week.

I started to notice that it was more difficult to achieve a normal orgasm because my penis became so hard during erections. The habit to let erections lasting for longtime without normal masturbation and ejaculation gave me sometimes very hard erections but on the other hand erections were more difficult to stimulate when I wanted to.

It took me much more efforts and time for achieving orgasms at will and it was exhausting.

I realised what those years of unnatural practices did to me and that it will surely take time to recover.

And as usual : no women, no love or sexual relationship this year.

(By the way, I tried regularly during all those years to find a girl on dating sites but it never worked. My nofap "magnetism" never worked for that strangely...).

2015 : I was now 30 years old. It has been a real change in my state of mind. I realised all the years I have wasted for nothing useful. I realised that all those excesses, problems and stupid practices have ruined my health, my youth and my creativity.

I stopped to believe in nofap for weeks and tried to masturbate until ejaculation more regularly. It was hard to do so though and my libido was low most of the time.

I felt very old. But I noticed that more frequent ejaculations and orgasms had a healing effect. I felt rejuvenated and happier, at least more normal.

I started to investigate on this phenomenon and was alternating between weeks of nofap (or just one orgasm a week) and weeks of orgasms/ejaculations every two days to feel the difference.

I was better with orgasms for sure. But the ideal of nofap was like a virus, very hard to stop, so I was still in doubt about what to do. "Maybe if I start a new nofap streak with the right attitude it will really work this time... I have to try again"... That is what I thought regularly.

But anytime I was on nofap mode it was always worst. Alternating constantly between nofap and normal life made me bipolar or schizophrenic. I had two personalities, the nofap personality and the normal personnality.

It made me so crazy this year that during the streaks I started to have weird desires like wanting anal stimulation by exemple. I was so frustrated to refrain from orgasm that I had now to find other ways to have pleasure.

It was the beginning of a new phenomenon I will explain later.

Also I was so desperate to not have a girlfriend that I was hating women during the nofap streaks and I was very negative. It was not good at all.

 


  • Ill informed x 1

#15 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 02:47 AM

 

Btw, I have found this post on reddit few hours ago, but was visible only on his profile:
 

My 12 years of nofap/semen retention/celibacy Chronicles

2018 : Still occasional nofap streaks of a week here and there but it was more for experimenting the differences about rejuvenation.

I am now sure that nofap and semen retention age the body and I had proofs for myself that I was looking older when on nofap and younger when on regular orgasms.

Achieving orgasms easily was still difficult in the beginning of the year for me but when I was trying I really felt and looked younger.

I made an experiment on a social/dating site with my phone. I took pictures of me after some weeks of more regular orgasms (maybe two to three per week) and healthy lifestyle (enough sleep etc.). I had still some wrinkles around the eyes of course but looked more relaxed and fresh.

So I wrote on my page that I was 18 years old for seeing if people could believe me... And to my surprise it worked ! Nobody thought I was in reality 33 years old... It was amazing. I had many likes on my page and many young girls were liking. I am not at ease on social media so the conversations with some girls were finally useless and I met nobody in real life but it gave me confirmation that orgasms can have a healing and rejuvenating power.

I spent the year experimenting and trying to understand well this phenomenon and found it worked anytime. Keeping semen and abstaining from orgasms make me looking older and not nice while having regular orgasms makes me looking younger and healthier.

The effects are not immediate of course, it takes at least one or two weeks of nofap or orgasms to see a difference in looking older or younger and it is only for those involved in regular semen retention for many years. The newbies and those who are in since less than 7 years will see no difference.

Also if one wants to look younger he must have good nights sleep.

It will not be noticed by young men of course but those over 30 and who have been in semen retention for years can surely feel the difference.

I think the reason why so many PMO addicts say they are looking unhealthy when masturbating is just because their energy is drained by too much stimulations from the internet and too much intellectual concerns and problems who cause the sexual energy to be more or less blocked or not properly released even with frequent ejaculations. The cause are nervous disorders but the nervous disorders are not caused by natural orgasms. See the Reich theories about that for more details if you want.

What really drains people on PMO is largely the fact to search constantly new videos about specific weird fetishes most of the time and to be only obsessed by that. They become neurotic and masturbate mechanically with the mind and body full of stress but their problems have in fact nothing to do with sexuality.

A lot of nervous energy is lost when we are surfing the web anxiously for searching and watching things, even if it is not pornographic. I spent entire days and nights searching and reading books and articles about spirituality and philosophy, watching clean and interesting videos on YouTube and was completely drained nonetheless, tired and feeling bad after those sessions anytime. We can binge and feel bad even with good content if we use it wrongly and waste time with it.

Masturbation and orgasms are natural and are not the problem. All is in the state of mind we have during masturbation.

It seems that men like Wilhelm Reich were right 100 years ago when they understood that the way the sexual energy is released or repressed influences all the personality and life of an individual.

Orgasms are healthy but only when make in good states of mind and with the good physical attitude (natural breathing, relaxation, spontaneity in moves and no repression or shame of any energetic manifestation who can come, like a need of making noises of pleasure...).

Concerning the loss of vitamins and minerals ejaculations can induce I tend to think that it is a mistake to believe it is so bad. The reason is that even if one can feel some gains in strength and other health effects while keeping semen it is more a nervous phenomenon caused by the strengthening of the self-will than a seminal effect.

Semen is not meant for being "transmuted" or "sublimated" or for "higher purposes". It is meant for being released through orgasms regularly since anyway a healthy body is constantly producing new cells and new semen. Keeping it by force is unnatural and go against the law of nature. Only problems can be the results of such practice.

The minerals, vitamins etc. in semen are useless for the body of the owner, like those found in his urine, because these minerals are normally for giving life to another body through reproduction. It is an energetic gift to the world, not a selfish matter one must keep for him in the body. Semen kept in the body will not transmute but will degenerate and prevent the normal renewal of the cells and the regular rejuvenation of the organism.

Keeping semen for too long is dangerous. And there are many other risks like cancer, hormonal disorders etc. Just think about the pain we feel when we have blueballs from abstinence... Many guys can't walk or move normally during these phases. Is it healthy ? Of course it is not. The body needs desperately to release this semen no matter when, how and why, and even if the conscious mind has wrong beliefs and wants to practice abstinence the body will finally release some sperm through a wet dream anyway. You can't fight against nature without being wrong.

Anyway, at the end of the year after masturbating more frequently for months I have been able to heal many things psychologically and physically, thanks to the rejuvenating power of good regular orgasms. The ED finally healed, my erections are now normal and healthy and I can orgasm easily again.

At the end of the year I was masturbating sometimes three times a day and every day, between some periods of rest where I had no special needs to masturbate but was absolutely not trying to do nofap.

I did it with my own imagination or soft images, girls on TV etc. But no need to use porn or too much stimulation anymore.

I was dreaming about sweet vaginal penetration and love most of the time while masturbating or just some other natural fantasies and fetishes I have, and sometimes I tried to not fantazised, just immerging myself into the feelings without thinking about something special, letting the thoughts coming and going as they want, as if in a relaxed and natural meditative state.

I never had such a good libido and feelings since my early teenage years.

I quit all beliefs and spiritual concerns and try to live freely, eating what I want when I am hungry with no rules and just following my intuition for everything.

I also quit reading books or any advice on the internet and my mind is free.

I have been alone this year again but I was not even searching for a girl anyway. So not too much frustrations. I enjoyed not searching for anything and just being myself.

2019 : in the beginning of the year I surprisingly relapsed in believing in nofap again although all the good things I have seen quitting that. Bad results and anxiety came back. Nofap belief is really the worst thing ever for me. It is always hidden somewhere in my mind ready to come back but I will always do my best for fighting this heresy when it comes and being free.

Now I want to share with you my story and experience and I hope it can be useful and interesting to some guys.

Honestly, I still don't know what the ultimate truth is. I don't know if I am right or wrong. I don't know how to help others. I don't have any advice to give because after all everybody has to choose what is good for him.

But all I know is that in my experience nofap is bad and extremely dangerous for mind and body. I regret everyday to have read and believed about semen retention. Nofap is like a mental disease I try to heal and it is difficult.

If some guys are like me I hope my testimony can help them to find the will to quit the slavery of nofap and other weird practices. I am still myself in a recovery process with occasional relapses and have many things to heal until I could say that I am normal again so I can't really help other people. All I can do is writing here what I feel and what I lived and if you have similar experiences just know that you are not alone and that we are all trying to heal our souls from the evil of wrong beliefs and slavery.

Now I will also quit all social media because I live better without being active on the internet, and reading and writing too much is exhausting for me.

So please don't send me messages and questions because I don't have the time and the energy to answer and I will not come to the forum before a while anyway.

I think I wrote almost everything I had to say here and people who really want to quit nofap or any wrong philosophy have to think by themselves for doing so. This is the first step to freedom.

I am just coming back today to write this as my definitive contribution to the nofap community who needs to know what happened to some of the veterans.

I think in the future many men who still think nofap and semen retention are good will understand one day what I am writing here and will understand that nofap and semen retention are bad after years of experience.

The reason why I wrote my message in english and not in french is because nofap is not popular in France so the majority of french people don't care and can't understand what I have to say. It is useless to talk about nofap to the French, they can't take it seriously anyway.

I am sorry if my writing style is bad and if I did some mistakes. English language is not easy to me. It is difficult sometimes to find the appropriate english words for expressing some of the things I have to say so it took me many hours (in fact it took me days) of work to write it.

Anyway thanks for reading and good luck.

dyionysusrex • [score hidden] •  submitted 1 hour ago

2016 : Always alternating between nofap streaks and normal life and always celibate I became more schizophrenic and bipolar than ever.

I started to crossdress again and was walking in town with make up and girl clothes and shoes I bought.

I thought that if no girls wanted to be with me I could be myself a kind of girlfriend for me, so I was wearing girl clothes for feeling like a girl presence in my life. I had like another personality when dressed as a girl. So I had three personalities : the nofap, the normal and the crossdresser/girl. And In fact while playing a girl this ideal girl had many personalities too... I was many different girls according to my mood and my clothes.

I started to have some soft homosexual desires for young and beautiful guys but ONLY during semen retention. When I had orgasms and ejaculations I was myself again, my mind was suddenly clear and I was disgusted by what I thought during semen retention.

That means nofap/semen retention was the cause of these abnormal thoughts and feelings to me. If I masturbate and have orgasms regularly I have only heterosexual desires and I don't want to wear girl clothes at all. I feel just normal and relaxed.

All those things were caused by frustration and abnormal efforts to keep semen for an illusory energetic transmutation who never came like expected.

I thought regularly over the years to go to the prostitutes (hookers) for having some concrete intercourse with a woman, but for a strange reason I was disgusted by this solution and never did it. I needed a woman who was really liking me and not just someone I have to pay for a work.

Also I was not going to nightclubs and parties where sex is easy because I hate going out during the night and generally there is too much male competition and aggressiveness in those places. I don't feel like dancing around many guys I don't know and who also want jealously the girls I would like to seduce.

So after searching new solutions I had an idea. And in summer during a nofap streak I once go to a swinging club (a libertine club) opened in the afternoon, where I had to be naked with many people who had intercourse freely. It was smelling sperm everywhere and there were homosexuals and heterosexual people. Most of the men had a big and large penis and I felt so small compared to them...

People there were almost all wearing tattoos, men and women.
I noticed later that many people who love tattoos are also involved in libertine clubs, acting in porn movies etc. It seems like the tattoos culture is linked to the libertine culture. This is strange.

One young straight guy who said he was a military talked friendly with me for a while but forgot all about me when a woman of maybe 50 years old he knew well came in the club and took him away for sucking his dick.

But no women wanted me though so it has been useless to go there for me.

It let me in a very sexual vibe though and I was finally interested to try a homosexual relation, since no women wanted me anyway, no matter how I tried to be interesting.

So some days later I was finally in a gay club where in 5 minutes in I met a young guy who said I was beautiful and we were soon together in a private room. Nothing happened though because I was finally disgusted and unable to have an erection but the guy was nice enough for not proposing or demanding sodomy or something hardcore. He understood my situation and why I was here and we were only talking friendly until I finally go back home.

This day I understood definitively that I am a pure straight guy even if women don't like me. I can be really excited sexually only by women.

So after that experience I cleared my mind quitting nofap and was back to normality...

Well...ok, not completely normal but I tried.

I spent the summer trying an experiment with pornography. I bought old movies/dvd and decided to watch a movie per day in the afternoon on tv screen. It meant one or two hours per day.

Since years of semen retention and excessive edging led me to erectile dysfonctions and difficulties to achieve orgasms easily (it took me sometimes hours to achieve ejaculation) I was in need of some help with pornography for having more regular orgasms and healing myself. It was a temporary healing process until it could be easier to me to orgasm fast naturally.

I used good old Italian porn movies, like the early Rocco Siffredi and Roberto Malone movies from the early 90's when they were not hardcore. It was not so bad and shocking than what we see now on the internet. People in these old movies show sweet feelings and sensuality, they kiss and love each other. Well, there is also a lot of sodomy/anal sex in these movies but this is not hardcore, just porn/eroticism so this is not shocking. At least I was able to tolerate watching that for a while and even enjoying that, even if I found vaginal sex scenes better (my main interest with the movies was to watch vaginas and beautiful women enjoying sex).

So it felt good to recover for some weeks my sexuality with that, even if I was not a fan of pornography in the beginning it helped for a while so in a way I am thankful there is still some pornography like that available.

I noticed that with regular orgasms (one or twice a day) while watching joyous and good quality pornography with eroticism I was more relaxed, happy and cool and more energetic at the same time.

And strange things happened like women looking at me in town and smiling (it never happened to me on nofap, NEVER...). Even my young neighbor who hated me so much was suddenly saying "hi" with a smile to me...

It seemed I had a glow and a magnetism like what nofapers talk about. But I had it doing exactly the reverse of nofap... How one can explain that ? It was so weird. But it was real. Even my mum noticed a positive change on me and felt I was in better health.

I also felt rejuvenated physically. I felt younger and actually looked younger. Less wrinkles around the eyes and a better complexion.

But after one month of this experiment, for a strange reason I relapsed in believing in nofap again and soon all the benefits of orgasms vanished and I felt again like an old celibate man trying to achieve some powers through semen retention...

And the war between my nofap personality and my real personality was going on... It was alternating for short periods but constantly until the end of the year.

That is when during a nofap streak I understood the energetic change nofap can cause. Abstinence and frustration were causing so much tensions around the anal zone that finally the sexual energy is blocked here and leads to the need of anal stimulation.

I call this phenomenon the "anal switch". It means that if the sexual energy is not properly released trough ejaculation by masturbation of sexual act it will one day or another be blocked around the anal zone and will find the anal way for trying to create an orgasm.

That is why passive gay men can ejaculate copious amounts of sperm during anal stimulation, because when the prostate is stimulated correctly through sodomy it can make an ejaculation and an orgasm even if the passive man has no erection.

So basically you can understand the ultimate danger of nofap and semen retention : becoming homosexual or obsessed by anal stimulation.

Believe it or not, this is a truth.

That is a truth only few people understand and it is only for those who have been involved in semen retention for many years.

Knowing that, you understand why so many monks in the Church history but even many Buddhists and Hindu monks and yogis were becoming homosexuals or sexual perverts after trying to be celibate. This is unnatural to be celibate and it leads to all kinds of perversions.

I don't mean homosexuality and sodomy are necessarily perversions but becoming homosexual or obsessed with sodomy because of energetic and physical changes due to forced celibacy and semen retention for years is certainly unnatural and is a perversion, yes.

And as usual, guess what ?... Still no women, no love and sexual relationship this year for me of course.

dyionysusrex • [score hidden] •  submitted 2 hours ago

2012 : Good year for me. I have been lucky sometimes and happier than the last years.

I have learnt many new and usefull things and was studying by myself English and other scholar things I needed to work on (please remember that English is not my natural language).

Of course, I was still under the spell of false beliefs and practices and I did many mistakes and bad things. Trying to keep semen retention was still torturing me and making me insane.

I started to read some messages of nofapers on Reddit and forums. The nofap community was really starting to grow. It was inspiring.

But personally I was in fact starting to give up more and more my interest for semen retention and my streaks were less and less regular.

At the end of the year I noticed the advancement of my aging process and my wrinkles and teeth seemed particularly bad.

I was in a happy mood though because the year has been good.

Oh, and of course, no women, no love or sexual relationship this year. As usual.

2013 : Strange year. Not bad but not so good as 2012.

I took many wrong decisions and risks all year long and it has been exhausting finally. Total mess.

But my energy level was surprisingly high and I had again regularly faith in pure semen retention, like in the beginning, before all the mistakes.

I felt strong needs of purity and love during this year and was very emotional, with sublime feelings. Some creativity came back.

I finally stopped sungazing and other dangerous or weird practices and tried to do semen retention with clean mind and behaviour. Back to the origins of the faith in purity. I had enough of all the junky excesses I indulged in the past while practicing semen retention, when I was wanting power or weird magical effects who never came.

I followed some people like Classic Obass on YouTube and it was inspiring and a motivation for a while.

But I was still in great doubt sometimes about what to do. What if nofap was just an hoax ? I can't waste my time with lies. I had so few benefits after all those years and so much pain... Why I was still believing that ? So one day I believed and the other I was in doubt and confusion, and things were going like that again and again...

2014 : I had to move in another house this year and it has been a rather unsatisfactory change. I had to pay monthly for this house and it was small. I felt not so free compared to the ancient house.

When I had to search for this new house I was in a strict and clean nofap streak and I thought it worked. I have been lucky. The owners have been immediately ok for letting me the house and said I was nice.

I am still sure that if I search and ask some owners while not on nofap it would be more difficult to be accepted for a rent since all I have for me for influencing people is my energy/aura. I have no money and no social advantages so when you are like that doing strict Nofap for a while can give a temporary luck and good vibes who can help to be respected, it is true.

But it is hard to do... And when you stop clean strict nofap you take the risk that people change their mind about you and stop respecting you. It is a vicious cycle.

It happened to me all the time.

Someone talks to me friendly out of nowhere on nofap but if I masturbate and have orgasm the following day the same person dislikes me for no reason.

Some people can respect me when on nofap but once I relapse they don't care about me. It seems that what was attracting them was the energy from nofap and not my real personality anyway so why so much efforts after all ?

It seems like energetic vampirism. Some people want the energy from nofapers like vampires because they need inconsciously this energy for them. They don't really care about the real individual.

In the end of the year I met a nice man in a library who talked to me and became in few days a good friend. He was constantly nice with me and wanted to see me almost everyday. I was on strict nofap (no edging etc.) at this time. But as soon as I relapsed things changed. It was not so nice as before and the friendship ended.

I was tired of this game because it happened many times during the year with many people.

I started seriously to plan to stop all nofap and semen retention streaks and just being normal again. It was too much frustrating. The benefits were never real benefits but turned to be problems. And don't talk about superpowers, that was completely a crazy lie according to my experience for years. I was just the most vulnerable and ordinary guy you can meet. In fact, I was still and definitely a loser. Nothing changed.

2014 was the year where I gave up some illusions and started to be real to myself again.

So at the end of the year I quit the internet completely at home and started progressively to quit my beliefs and practices. But I was still ejaculating not so often, maybe one or two times a week.

I started to notice that it was more difficult to achieve a normal orgasm because my penis became so hard during erections. The habit to let erections lasting for longtime without normal masturbation and ejaculation gave me sometimes very hard erections but on the other hand erections were more difficult to stimulate when I wanted to.

It took me much more efforts and time for achieving orgasms at will and it was exhausting.

I realised what those years of unnatural practices did to me and that it will surely take time to recover.

And as usual : no women, no love or sexual relationship this year.

(By the way, I tried regularly during all those years to find a girl on dating sites but it never worked. My nofap "magnetism" never worked for that strangely...).

2015 : I was now 30 years old. It has been a real change in my state of mind. I realised all the years I have wasted for nothing useful. I realised that all those excesses, problems and stupid practices have ruined my health, my youth and my creativity.

I stopped to believe in nofap for weeks and tried to masturbate until ejaculation more regularly. It was hard to do so though and my libido was low most of the time.

I felt very old. But I noticed that more frequent ejaculations and orgasms had a healing effect. I felt rejuvenated and happier, at least more normal.

I started to investigate on this phenomenon and was alternating between weeks of nofap (or just one orgasm a week) and weeks of orgasms/ejaculations every two days to feel the difference.

I was better with orgasms for sure. But the ideal of nofap was like a virus, very hard to stop, so I was still in doubt about what to do. "Maybe if I start a new nofap streak with the right attitude it will really work this time... I have to try again"... That is what I thought regularly.

But anytime I was on nofap mode it was always worst. Alternating constantly between nofap and normal life made me bipolar or schizophrenic. I had two personalities, the nofap personality and the normal personnality.

It made me so crazy this year that during the streaks I started to have weird desires like wanting anal stimulation by exemple. I was so frustrated to refrain from orgasm that I had now to find other ways to have pleasure.

It was the beginning of a new phenomenon I will explain later.

Also I was so desperate to not have a girlfriend that I was hating women during the nofap streaks and I was very negative. It was not good at all.

 

 

 

                 1.   I read the majority of this and found it rather repulsive to read especially the homosexual parts.  I'm curious as to why you put this in the thread. Nofap is only the first step of a deeper process really. All this post really indicates is a dude absolutely so desperate for sex that he is incapable of approaching or doing anything of value within his own life. It seems he is probably a homosexual sense he is struggling to attract women but he shouldn't be attracting women anyways, sense they should naturally be coming to him this is self-evident. I found it rather humorous  that he had offers for gay men because he was so desperate to have some type of sexual experience.  He almost sounds rather autistic within a sense, it's NOT that hard to get a chick really, it's not. To be frank with you, I never ever approach a girl.  Simply because I absolutely hate doing it.  Even then, I don't really care all that much anymore. I won't lie it used to be bother me for a long time but I've gotten over it. It's funny too, because on my longest SR streak I literally had gay dudes throwing themselves at me and offered me sex which I obviously turned down. Along with plenty of women who invited me to parties. In san Jose I had multiple occasions to get those experiences, with pure immoral sluts but I decided against it. Keep in mind this is when I was at my peak of physical physique. I could do 35 pull ups and was deadlifting 350 and also a salsa dancer on a performance dance team. I was literally the empitome of sexy. It seem to me this dude is just addicted to pornography and wants any excuse to be a loser. Which is fine if your ok with that type of thing.   So I'm confused to the purpose of this post,sure I thought about going back to that disgusting immorality but that doesn't solve anything now does it ? I like my lifeforce and don't care if orgasm is good, this idiot is just deluding himself. He doesn't know addiction, I know what real addiction is. The type where you spend 26 hours doing one thing and ignoring food and water, the type where you weigh 115 pounds and are obsessed with your phone. This is just  a post of a heroine addict who misses the good times. 

                 2. Sexual transmutation really isn't that complicated and people attribute it to way to many things. It simply is a lifestyle change and it gives you more energy as it builds up over time. If you use it correctly then in theory you should be able to get more done. It won't change your personality much, medication does that way more than sexual transmutation ever did. All it did for me was overemphasize my personality characteristics. So this dude is overthinking it similar to what I do alot of the time. Life isn't that complicated. I suspect, I don't even really have issues with girls frankly. If I really wanted to, I could get plenty of numbers if I approach.  If I REALLY wanted to, I could make something happen. I don't care that MUCH. Sure it bothers me, when I'm ridiculously strong, smart, creative, attractive, responsible, high gpa, enlightened, a dancer, a drawer and so many amazing things but none of that matters does it? This dude is probably just aspergers. If I really really wanted to I could easily get plenty of ladies, I never ever ever ever approach because I hate it. Most of my issues are intimacy problems, I fear intimacy and I have trust issues. Adoption will do that to you. Next, I never had a mom, so I had no model feminine relationships which mirrors my relationships with women not surprisingly. So it's probably my fault anyways,  I hate trust, I believe trust is for fools. The same goes for intimacy. Why have a relationship when you will be betrayed AGAIN? This is a subconscious thing I'm working on but won't change much I suspect. So I've self-imposed my singleness ON MYSELF, SR is merely to assist me with those issues. Which I doubt it will fix. Change is a paradox isn't it? I want to change but I refuse to trust or to have intimacy because of denial as a child? Ofcourse, I don't have mommy issues but that's the cost of those relationships. Really, I don't have any of these issues of this individual. He seems lost and in denial of his sexuality. I would never have sex with a dude just to have a sexual experience... The only relation is, he doesn't want to FIX it. For example, I keep complaining about my singledom yet I do nothing to fix it? Does online dating count? My hatred and distrust probably is merely an extension of my hated of my mom. Very simple. So I want to change but maybe I'm looking for someone to validate  a perception of betrayal? Humans are curious creatures. I suspect he's doing something similar. Anyways, I'm rambling what is the point of this post? 

 

                                  P.s If it's not ironic enough, My father and Brother are amazing with women, infact they  have slept with copious numbers of them. The only difference, is I overthink and they don't. Oh and they also have stable jobs, except he jumps job to job. So ADHD is another factor. Like I said If I was normal, things would be DRASTICALLY different. I promise.


Edited by DrewMichael21, 05 February 2019 - 02:55 AM.

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#16 Bubbles

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 08:13 AM

Yea it's because I found so many wrong things with his post that I just needed a second opinion. Like he is into SR as a str8 man and goes to a gay club lol

I am disgusted by his post, also claiming SR and nofap may have aged him, lolololo, it should be quite the contrary, and is funny how he doesn't mention his lifestyle health choices, mostly because he isn't aware of it.

Just showing you there are people out there doing this and doing it very wrong. Indeed, it does sound to me a lot autistic.

Anyway, did you start reading this yet? Is the translation of SR of someone who does it way over 8 years now I think https://www.nofap.co...-remedy.135983/



#17 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 05:26 PM

Yea it's because I found so many wrong things with his post that I just needed a second opinion. Like he is into SR as a str8 man and goes to a gay club lol

I am disgusted by his post, also claiming SR and nofap may have aged him, lolololo, it should be quite the contrary, and is funny how he doesn't mention his lifestyle health choices, mostly because he isn't aware of it.

Just showing you there are people out there doing this and doing it very wrong. Indeed, it does sound to me a lot autistic.

Anyway, did you start reading this yet? Is the translation of SR of someone who does it way over 8 years now I think https://www.nofap.co...t-remedy.135983

  Yes this makes sense, this dude is a freak. He makes me sound normal and I talk to myself all day and night and never stop thinking.   He is simply an in closest homosexual. So yes, he probably doesn't know the real implicit purpose of sexual transmutation and it's intrinsic purpose in the short term perspective and long term.  I will investigate into this post but right now I'm going to eat many tons of pumpkin seeds because it's supposed to increased your semen production by ten fold and your recovery time.So in theory, the more x amount of semen production that you produce the more y amount of production you should expect if you correctly sexually transmute it. My medication concerta has allowed me to do SR much easier and I don't leak as much with my meds. Interestingly, I've yet to see any real cognitive benefits, so It's not like a super power or anything.  In fact, women attraction and overall universal energy vibrations appear to be very low as of late, and I'm on day 9 again after my last WD, so this might dampen my theory on ST but who knows really. For example, my economics test I would argue my testing ability is worse than it's been before but then again i didn't study as much as I should have. My goal is simple to see if ST promotes a higher achievement level, thus in theory I should be able to easily get a 4.0 with 20 credit units but this is proving more difficult than anticipated.  You should check into pumpkin seeds apparently it raises your testosterone levels. I will report back on this within a week.

 

                  P.s For those, that use pumpkin seeds be aware that you have a HIGH HIGH likelyhood of WD(Wetdreaming), their are anecdotal accounts of people literally pissing their life-force,so the general recommendation is  10 pumpkin seeds but I'm going to do 100. 


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#18 Bubbles

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 06:21 PM

Yes I know about the pumpkin seeds, they contain a lot of Zinc so go figure :)

I have been eating them like crazy lately as well. I eat about 200 grams of it which is a shit ton actually, nearly 500kcal lol. Doesn't get me fat because I somewhat count the calories as well, and no wet dream due to them but I agree I have heard it may happen for some. Also, after a wet dream, if you want to get quickly back on  your feet, take a good Zinc supplement or just eat plenty pumpkin seeds.



#19 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 07 February 2019 - 07:21 AM

Yes I know about the pumpkin seeds, they contain a lot of Zinc so go figure :)

I have been eating them like crazy lately as well. I eat about 200 grams of it which is a shit ton actually, nearly 500kcal lol. Doesn't get me fat because I somewhat count the calories as well, and no wet dream due to them but I agree I have heard it may happen for some. Also, after a wet dream, if you want to get quickly back on  your feet, take a good Zinc supplement or just eat plenty pumpkin seeds.

  Moderate update for you I bought a big bag of pumpkin seeds yesterday. The universe hasn't really gone to much in my favor. I didn't get the scholarship I was looking for and got my first D on a test, which was bullshit. Then again, I procrastinated sense I disliked studying and was getting moderate burnout. I may drop the class in order to protect my gpa at all cost. We will see how that goes. I ate 100 pumpkins and feel no different. I'm wondering what will happen when I eat 100 pumpkin seeds a day with CONCERTA and semen retention. Overall, concerta is horrible for dancing and I don't recommend it. Sigh, I wish I was normal already..Being treated like a weirdo unconfident person by an ugly person who your better than, is really an unenjoyable experience. The irony of my life..


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#20 Bubbles

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Posted 07 February 2019 - 08:41 AM

Remember that most of the things, they exist in your head, don't beat yourself over that test, scholarship miss is in the past now so let it go. Probably the burnout is from Concerta indirectly? Are you getting plenty of seep or have relaxing activities in the evening or you play video games as 'relaxing' (which are no good for relaxing if fast paced, violent). If you have high cortisol all day long it will eventually get you down.


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#21 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 07 February 2019 - 08:14 PM

Remember that most of the things, they exist in your head, don't beat yourself over that test, scholarship miss is in the past now so let it go. Probably the burnout is from Concerta indirectly? Are you getting plenty of seep or have relaxing activities in the evening or you play video games as 'relaxing' (which are no good for relaxing if fast paced, violent). If you have high cortisol all day long it will eventually get you down.

      

 

                  No I only toke it for 2 days and then went off it before the depressive and aggresive side effects started to kick in. I felt ok for the days granted we still had a little zombie effect but that was inevitable unfortunately.  Yes, I'm sleeping well, I'm just not simply doing enough to crush my goals as well as I should right now. I'm mad about the scholarship and my grade because that will effect my ability to even have any remote hope of getting into stanford and getting very wealthy...  Next, I don't have any intention of taking out another student loan again because it's simply not worth it anymore  for another 9500.. So the expenses  are killing especially when I NEED to manage everything. It will work out I just need to be a bit more clever.. SR Benefits are basically zero lately. Only thing different is my my nuts hurt really really badly. A few WD's and a bit of horiness again. If I can manage the impossible this semester very good things will happen. I need all the advantages I can get. ADHD doesn't help that.


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#22 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 10 February 2019 - 08:59 PM

   02-10-2019                  1.    Moscow, is having it's most dense winter as of yet which is of surprise to me. It's now essentially 5 inches of snow and this is getting utterly moronic. I really am looking reprieve form the snow, so that I can finally experience the sun again and all of it's glory. Nonetheless, I will make a minor update, sense I find a great deal of catharsis in keeping myself as busy as possible from the looming pure white of snow that can easily cause troubling depression to even the most resilient of minds. In other news, My semen retention will have hit it's goal, which will be about 14/15 days and then I will break it apart into another 15 days which i found much much more doable then breaking it up into one long streak which i have consistently failed at for quite a long time now within those given respects.  So first things, first for newbies make sure that you remember to not get discouraged when you have a minor relapse or WD yourself. I no longer am experiencing any type of WD( Wetdreams) anymore, sense my mind has largely had a good deal of clarity. I've almost cut out ASMR totally from all my habits now, and just let myself lie awake even though my sleep patterns are still bad. What has changed? I really don't much different frankly, speaking it just feels like the new normal within some respects and I don't have the charge of high testosterone that I had one day 22 quite a while ago which in some respects I'm hoping to recapture. It feels almost  like you would call a flatline but in other respects, I've been able to hold significantly longer conversations and they tend to be more enjoyable. I had a long conversation with my brother and had way better listening skills when I normally would refuse to talk to him whatsoever, Coincendence? No idea, but I will need SR in the coming weeks and months as I make more important plans for the weeks and months to come.

 

                                     2. Have I been transmuting? Frankly, I haven't really had much energy to transmute as of late and I just feel really spacey some days I'm really good with my focus and other days it appears just like a lost outcome of missing which just further angers me within some respects. I made a post a while ago about a girl I liked and to theorize, about whether she was an energy vampire or not. Interestingly enough, right after the WD(Wet-Dream) she stopped replying to me which pretty much confirms everything that I suspected all along.  Interestingly, enough it's as if I've disturbed the matrix because individuals like the police and other people have been paying much more attention to me than I normally get which is as if I'm now a threat again to them in that respects.  Although I've done really nothing wrong I find myself within strained and inconspicious situations. In other news, has my success with ladies gotten any better? Like I said, I suppose if I really wanted to I could easily fix this part of my life but I just really don't even care much about it anymore. I simply never ever approach and I probably never will unless she is someone really worth my time. So, my grades are still fairly caught up and I  need to finish getting my prescription and I will get the results for my testing as soon as monday I'm hoping so that I can finally start getting some real constructive treatment so that I can really mobilize change within my own life.

                                  3.  As usual, my sex drive has all but disappeared and I actively avoid what I call weaponized images of sexual imagery that are used against men on an almost regular basis, so their is that concern and I heavily recommend that you avoid this and avoid youtube at all cost. Their was a single moment, where I considered going back but I snapped out of it and realized, that my life force is simply so much more important than something as moronic as that. This feels like that permanent change of SR that I had before i had come to moscow and I don't think this is going away anytime soon. So I can probably say I've finally mastered my sexual desires within all their respects and all their outcomes. Like I said, I haven't really noticed anything of true significant or consequence. It really didn't do anything for my ADHD or my drive as it did the first time I did it. It appears that SR has become normalized as the new normal,so it simply just is. Medication makes SR so easy it's not even difficult anymore.  I can easily make myself go for ridiculously long periods that would be much more difficult because I have a much higher ability to be able to suppress my impulsive tendencies and desires.

 

                              4. In other good news I've been able to secure hopefully about 10k in more money to supply me a greater standard of living which should help thanks to my improved persuasion abilities. So their is that. At church, I've been going consistently for 3 months and haven't made a single excuse being off MEDICATION, which I'm super proud of  because it's probably the longest I've been this consistent. I've probably been going about 5 months consistent but without medication is even more impressive within that respect.  I appologize if this isn't a directional guide for your journey unto the issues of sexual transmutation but it will invariably become more focused over time ideally. PUMPKIN SEEDS, do they work? I only severe pressure over my urethra to the point that semen was almost dripping for a little bit but their wasn't really a problem my ability to suppress this has increased by 100 fold only within a couple days which will probably allow to me to suppress indefinitely ideally. So other than that, I now simply feel  normal I really don't feel much different so that might discourage you on the journey of semen RETENTION because I don't have this excess energy that was I was ST'ing like before. 

 

                             5.  Life decisions? Does SR improve any of these executive abilities? I would say it might a little bit because my mind has more clarity to see what it is that I want to do which I feel is very important and your clarity allows you to see things as they are rather than as you want them to be. I'm still struggling to make a decision on whether to take up engineering or computer science as a major or simply stick to what I have simply because I would very very much enjoy having increased financial stability which SR has done absolutely done nothing for within this given respect which is unfortunate. I will finally be exploring sensory deprivation so that I can get a better understanding of my internal soul and a better feel of all the feelings of the mind and the body. Should this fail then I suppose I WILL have exhausted all my options in relation to ADHD treatment and will have medication, therapy, and an executive coach for the rest of my life. Which I really don't mind. Therapy is pretty worthless also but I just do it now out of habit. Interestingly I've finally become inconsistent at the gym because of all the gyms have been excluding me. I'm hoping to bring back in that habit as I get back onto my medication.  Most of my muscle is still here which is a nice gift.

 

                          6. The purpose of SR(Semen retention) Overview: I would like to state that your purpose for semen retention even if their are no real benefits is to make sure to simply do it anyways, because your own disconnection from your own self-gratification will set you free from  your own slavery. Now, many who pursue this journey are INCEL(Involuntarily celibate) so I wouldn't reccomend that you cutt off all connections with your femine  side and perhaps you may even have to do some form of cold-approach because most incel people are simply afraid of approach and rejection, so you may simply have to do that in order to gain the experience your required in order to understand al the dynamic aspects of a relationship. When you do, go beyond the 90 mark which I haven't done yet you should ideally experience those superpowers that your looking for and if you don't experience that then, this is fine as well. Above all you have demonstrated to yourself that You can dominate yourself and your own self-mastery is the domination of what you don't want to do. The control of impulse is the control of your own freedom. SR is your gift  to where you have finally broken yourself from the shackles of slavery and oppression which probably explains why i've been having weird situations that normally would be insignifcant like say the police coming to your front door on trumpup nonesense for making an illegal uturn. In this essence, you could be considered a threat and you will gain friends and enemies and those people will want you to remain the same. You may observe strange coincedences that you are incapable of explaining, like seeing people subtly talk about sex and dressing more perverted to "re-enslave" you is what I like to call it.  Don't be tempted by this folly because you have mastered this folly before and you can master it again. Don't be tempted to go back. Their is nothing for you there. There is only desolation, suffering, emptiness and the immorality of your own mind running from your own problems that aren't going to go away anytime soon. Accept the problems and accept the reality of those outcomes.  Do I attribute all this to something as simplistic as SR? Yes,I do because I've personally experienced it and SAW the benefits. For once in my life, I had an amazing conversation with my brother on a deeper level than I ever had. I wans't insecure, I wasn't angry and I was able to understand without judgment or resentment over a person who in some respects, I hate because he is more successful than I. When In reality, I am a GOD in comparison to him but I simply don't have the results to SHOW my GODHOOD or  to REALIZE my GLORY that I've been chasing for all so long. It wasn't an argument and it wasn't anything but me controlling the flow and course of the conversation. Perhaps, Pornography has let you run from your own inadequacy, your own rage, your own sorrow, it's HIDING SOMETHING that you are ashamed of and don't want to deal with because it's either to painful for you or you simply refuse to acknowledge it. This is the basis of all forms of addictions is to enslave yourself to your own misery because your own msiery is your own excuse for your inadequacy and your own excuse to never solve your problem because the realization of your own problem is the responsibility and hassle that you would have to deal with in order to correctly defiine yourself in those terms.  SR teaches you that to achieve anything regardless of the result is to do it anyways. Similar to me going to church, I don't even believe have of the things that they say and yet I continue to go because of the non-expectation and their motion of that stability within your own life. In simplest terms SR helps you attain STABILITY OF spirit and grounds you within your REALITY.

 

 

                                   7. Conclusion: Divorce yourself from the result. Divorce yourself from the reality of the expectation of the world. The world owes you nothing and you only owe it to yourself to take personal responsibility for yourself. Enjoy the process of SR. Enjoy your failure and ENJOY your WD because the process of your failure is the process and experimentation of your own solution and deevoution because you become what you practice, and what you practice is what you are. Practice being a loser and you will become a loser. I remember when I had reached the impossible 45 days and I relapsed finally after that day because I hadn't fully  divorced myself from the result and wanted to experience that high again and I remember when I through away everything that I'd built in SAN JOSE. Divorce yourself from those that would want to keep you the same. Divorce yourself only to the process of hard-work, grit and suffering. The self-imposed suffering of yourself  is your key to freedom. It's the real release that you haven't expected for yourself but when you realize this truth and then you finally become whole as NATURE MEANT IT TO BE.  Finally, when you reach godhood and you still have nothing then you will become something. When you are the lowest of moments and emptiness fulfills you and when you have suppressed and redirected your primal energy towards your DESIRE and your CHOICE rather than the desire leading you then we are free. Hence, the day I hope to be CURED of ADHD is the same delusion of me freeing myself of this addiction. In reality, I'd been practicing to stop this sense I was 15 but it always seemed impossible. Let the impossible become possible and let your changes become permanent changes rather than transitory outcomes. Until next,time.

 

                6. TLDR: NOT MUCH TO REPORT, Grounding events, nothing new at the UNIVERSITY, Sexuality has flatline, ASEXUALITY HAS COME, what are you? Don't expect the outcome just for the process. PROCESS=OUTCOME, divorce yourself from the RESULT, FOCUS on you and your goals and you can OVERCOME.KEEP GOING. 

                             


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#23 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 18 February 2019 - 03:48 AM

  UPDATE: 2-17-2019  SEMEN RETENTION:

 

 

                             1. So I'm going to make a brief post, since I'm not really in the mood to give you all a long stream of content today.  In other news, I will be starting my math homework right after this and hopefully that goes really well.  So what's new and what's happend? So I finally hit 21 days again right back to where I said a long time ago when I reported about it before I had the really stupid wet dream and apparently gave into the dream. So it was pretty easy to solve. Just make sure that you sleep on your back or side, never ever sleep on your stomach because your dick will be way to sensitive.  Oh and I stopped watching asmr and the wetdreams basically almost all but ceased to exist and went away. So, retaining pure 21 days of semen hasn't been that hard and frankly, concerta makes it stupid easy to do semen retention then without it because it becomes much harder sense your more impulsive. My stupid doctor or therapist is making me take another retest which is just to milk me for more money which just furthers proves my cynical views of people. I may see a new therapist or get elsewhere, sense this is taking an idiotic amount of time to get medication. Itseems as if these idaho people just don't want me to get treated which isn't really much of a surprise to me. I'll probably be back on concerta sooner rather than later. In other news, I got my license suspended because of another ADHD mistake where I accurued another 400 dolars in tickets and wasn't paying attention to paying it off in a timely fashion. It was more of a blessing in disguise since, I can cut my car costs, sense I basically I forgot I had a bike, so this will save me ALOT of money, which is super super good. I'll probably get my medication soon and my car traded in for something nicer. Interestingly, my academic performance seems to decline on medication which is strange I'm not really sure how to explain this. The food problem of where my mind gets tired? I figured it out, basically once your brain eats food you need to give it 2 to 3 hours to digest otherwise your blood glucose will be diverted from your brain to your stomach which makes sense as to why my focus declines even more. Obviously, I haven't even been remotely consistent at the gym anymore as predicted, it's very hard to start sense it requires so much activation energy. So, I believe I've found a good balance, I will take concerta about 3 times a week or less just to keep my life organized. Anymore and I feel I'm subject to getting horrible mood swings and just overall feeling like shit. I don't like feeling like shit so I won't do that to myself. At the same time, I need to medication to make sure I don't spend all my money like a moron which wouldn't help the situation. My life is still in shambles at this point but it's probably a solid balance between everything which I'm perfectly fine with and the winter is ending. I'm basically immune to the snow depression now, it has zero effect on my mood. I'm mostly content these days and just do everything I can. The days just seem like their building up to grad school and stanford university really, rather than a prior commitment. I would say for those that are taking medication, just use it like a tool and it should help you stabilize both your interests and your hobbies, so your not going everywhere like a monkey. MEDICATION is still mandatory and don't pretend you don't need it. Also I want to be clear on the term NEED. I don't NEED medication for school. However, I NEED it only for general life and to make sure I manage myself well and hopefully it helps me either hold down a job or start a business. I'm contemplating going into some type of trade to where I have a high powered skill so I can work for myself. Which I really enjoy so that I don't need answer to anyone and I can make my own schedule which I really enjoy.

 

                                        2. So I've given you a basic summary off my life. So that you can get a general context of myself and right now. Has semen retention given me godly focus NO. Absolutely not, it hasn't given me those powers that I had before interestingly. I suspect it's coming from when I shower which seems to negate the benefits, so I shower without shampoo every 3 days because I always feel very off and spacey so their might be something wrong with the water. So has SR given me high energy? Only today I've finally gotten that crazy energy back, but yesterday I wasted 13 hours on the phone and laid in bed. In all fairness I was pretty burnt out from the week so. Again, that's not an excuse and I'm not making it one. Do pumpkin seeds work? No, they appear placebo to me unless I didn't get the right pumpkin seeds but these are supposed to be organic, so that remains unclear to me as well.  The pressure in my urethra has  decreased significantly and mind just feels content and not much else. It's been a really really long time sense I cried or was sad which isn't really strange for me.  What else? Have I become more disciplined? Not really, I feel basically the same their isn't really anything that changed. I believe these benefits might eventually equalize as you settle into your New norm where you just don't masterbate for pleasure anymore or watch porn. So, I've basically accepted it as a lifestyle and I'm ok with that now. Did I get new friends or anything? Not really again. So perhaps most of these things that those SR people claimed might simply be bullshit but I feel better without those addictions regardless.  Friday was probably one of those amazing awe inspiring days that come right out of the movies except I was living it. I went dancing for 3 hours and had a magical time and basically new most of the people their. My roomate came for no reason along with his gf and they were chillen watching me apparently which was weird.  I dance with plenty of chicks and they were in awe at my dancing abilities, I also taught 5 people how to dance bachata, salsa and chacha. So that was super fun also.  Did I have that same attraction? Not really, I got rejected from 3 attractive chicks but didn't care much. it could possibly be, sense I lost a little muscle but I've been pretty good about maintaining it through pullups in the morning. It's hard to explain why it was magical. It simply just was, the energy, the people, the vibe, everything was just perfect. A once in a month type of event which I probably won't attribute to SR. Afterwards I danced with the same girl I've had a crush on for like 5 months, she friendzoned me like 4 months ago when I asked her out once. So I didn't really bother with it. Obviously, I danced with her like 4 times, So I suspect she is attracted to me but who knows. Other than that, my gpa seems decent and I got an A on my math test but that was through ALOT of grind and hardwork so I don't attribute that to SR either.

 

                                              3. What else to say? I would implore the individuals who are disappointed to this report, to just continue regardless because in the end the benefits don't really matter. It matters that you got clean for yourself and that is it's own reward. It's better to be content and clean than a drug addict who wastes his life force on foolish things when other people are living a much fuller life than what you are doing. It's very difficult and toke a long time to get back to this point and I suspect I can probably break my record of 45 days again because I've already went through a ton of repetition. My theory about that girl on okcupid was proven correct as well. She stopped talking to me the moment I lost my SR which basically proves what I suspected all along about energy vampires, so I just blocked her. So theirs nothing to report, and nothing has been gained. I'm hoping and am aiming for more scholarship money along with another rent dscount are my goals for right now, which I look forward to. I really have nothing other than, just remember if you feel like your going to give in. Just say "I'm not going to waste my lifeforce on something stupid." this really really helps me understand the magnanimity of quitting permanently. I'm more excited for my 90 day journey and to see what those benefits yield. Just 8 more days until I've done my 10 30 day streak of pure semen retention.  Above all, don't let those really really horrible days trigger you into addiction, these are typically those times when something awful occurs and I get triggered into my addiction and run from my problems. Don't do this. Do I have answers? Nope, I have none. I may go broke but I doubt that will happen really.  Did I get what I wanted from this experience? Am I STING these new energy? Nope, I haven't felt any new energy until TODAY where doing something wasn't a hassle but it was something that I simply did.  Do I still get anxiety and ADHD. YUP, didn't go away that's for sure. Other than that, my relations with my brother improved ten fold sense, we can hold a great conversation without me resenting his success when I'm obviously superior to him in everyway. Instead we, simply had a good conversation and he gave me what I wanted which was not an easy task. I will probably do this sensory deprivation tank shit he recommended, sense he has an ADHD like myself but a different type. The only distinction is he gets waay more women than me which i don't mind and he makes WAAAY more money than me. It's not even funny how much more money that they make. Most of my older siblings are very financially successful, so I do feel the pressure to one-up them with my OWN success which is another intrinsic motivator for myself. Commit to your new life and accept it as your new inevitability. Be mindful of who you spend your time around. Don't associate yourself with loosers, as loosers will only bring you down. Be attractive, be hungry, be still. Accept the process and not the outcome. If I told you honestly, I haven't gotten stronger in months, I plateaued probably almost a year ago and haven't got any better or strong but I still do it to keep going. This is SR, when you WDING, you wait a really really long time and you keep going. This is what life is. The pigs or police banned my license, so Now I bike and bus to class. I was ejected from my gym, so now I workout home occasionally. You can see me fall from grace FROM something amazing to NOTHING. I had a good conversation about it with the person who suspended me and she loves me. Yet, I know the damage has been done and  is irreversible unfortunately. Finally, if your struggling to comprehend a span like 90 days, break it up into 15 days instead and make mini goals that are attainable it will keep you motivated. Honestly, with SR you probably think you have NO REASON to do it, right? It's really awful, you get bad headaches, your dick hurts badly,  you get migraines, get wetdreams, you leak urine which is an odd side effect, you have an excess libido you don't know how to channel, you will have people who are aggresive to you for no reason. You basically have no reason to do it because of all these negatives but you do it for only one thing. SELF-discipline. That is it and that is the only reason you need. Until next time. // TLDR NOTHING NEW KEEP GOING, TRUST THE PROCESS NOT OUTCOME/ No benefits/ Girl I LIKE// Epic day/ 30/60 Days Next goal.

               


Edited by DrewMichael21, 18 February 2019 - 03:51 AM.

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#24 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 23 February 2019 - 11:50 PM

               02-23-2019

 

                              1.   So this will be a very minor update sense I'm basically 2 days away from pure semen retention without a single leak of semen as far as I can tell.  I've seen a modest increase in my ability to focus which seems modestly interesting. I've been having random chicks sense my invitations who I don't even know but they want to talk to me for whatever reason. These girls are very very attractive but I basically just blocked them. This other girl that I like who friendzoned me last time named emily, she wants to show me her bible and what not now. She claims that I need to see the will of god apparently, so I will check that out only simply because I'm attracted to her and she seems to be one of the only real girls that's attracted to me for me and not simply for my energy which is interesting. In other news, the drama of my life never really seems to end for whatever reason. I suspect their will come a point when everything will smooth out as my mind begins to accept the new realities of discipline and getting back into working out. My ability to focus and type faster seems to have only improved significantly on day 28 and day 27 respectively which is very strange. Before that, I received almost no benefits and showers seemed to be taking away my advantage that I had before. I no longer suffer from any wet dreams anymore sense, I simply no longer care about it anymore and I don't suffer those types of repulsive cravings any longer, simply because I'm not interested in wasting my life-force on any form of immorality that would deprive me of my life force and glory. 

 

                          2.  So what was this drama? Well it seems strange, but when your on SR you seem to garner both haters and lovers for whatever reason. I had 3 girls who basically went behind my back and started "whispering" complaints apparently about ambigious things I was saying. Yet, everything I said was taken out of context, it was almost as if they wanted to get rid of me from the area. I'm really not even remotely surprised about this.  Sense, it's almost always been a girl in the past, who has either gotten me fired, kicked out or banned from an area. This pattern seems to remain the same and I've become more masculine with my goatee they feel more threatened and acted more aggresive accordingly towards me in indirect ways. So basically, I was banned from my math lab for "verbal abuse" apparently.  I frankly don't give a damn anymore about these retarded people or making things work.  I'm sick of just dealing with all this stuff. When all I want is a normality in my life rather than things that seem to go wrong. So, I suppose you should be careful with your newfound power and energy because you will come as, more threatening, intense and confident. To be clear, what I stated was not even close to verbal abuse, they were merely jokes that were deemed insensitive. Do I give a fuck? Hell no, I've all but ignored my professor and permanently blocked him and the other individual on all modes of communication. They don't deserve my time and I don't need them. What else does SR give you? It gives you intestinal fortitude to see through the bull. It will allow you to say, they NEED ME, I don't need them. This is the type of confidence you afford yourself. 

 

                           3. Energy Vampires: Ok so back to the SR content, I gave you a bit of backround so that you would understand that SR isn't really magic but it's a subtle change of mind and a state of being. Anyways, so I indicated that their were more random coincedences and occurences with ladies. So basically, you should just block or ignore their friend requests and invites unless your simply looking for some form of instant-gratification. It's almost always not worth it. Especially if you've gotten to the 30 day+ mark it's simply not worth your time to even give them the time of day. Just remember, their only giving you the time of day because they literally want your energy in a subconcious perspective.  I was able to prove this about 4 times over a few online dating sites because these chicks randomly stopped talking to me with no reason at all when everything appeared to be going fine. The DAY after I lost my SR benefits basically and I was back to square one.  So my proposition is simple, SR can help you find those individuals that like YOU for YOU and not for the perception of yourself that's transitory within  it's nature.  Don't fool yourself within these respective senses of delusions. Just in general, I get WAY more likes on Okcupid for non reason at all, I haven't even put any effort into my account or anything. So this is one of those types of super-natural things that I'm incapable of explaining. 

                          4. Recall and Reflect: I think this is really important in making sure the changes that you have in your life become apart of you. Everything you do is an ongoing process that assists you towards a greater evolution. I've been on this journey for at least 2 years at a minimum. During my previous experiences, I used these benefits for sex, and instant-gratification. Then I used it to pressure a girl to get what I wanted. Then I gradually evolved and became angry and sexually frustrated and would relapse and then hate myself again and again. The process of SEMEN-RETENTION is an ongoing revolution and evolution where you evolve from your wants to only settling into a general contentment. This time around, I'm not falling for these vampires and this time around I don't give those fake people my time of day. Simply, because they aren't worth your time.  Once, you realize all the little tricks and the stupid attraction you will get sick of it because it's not new to you anymore and you know it's temporary just like yourself. So reflect on your past failures and go forward into the future. 

                         5. What can SR do for you? Will SR make you amazing? No it won't not as far as I can tell but then again most of the real benefits are supposed to come around the 90 day mark so I don't know. Will it give you an easier time with the ladies? This is a resounding yes, if you actually approach. Will it give you lasting relationships? This is a probably or a maybe, I don't know yet but I must emphasize you need to find someone that actually likes you for you. You will know it when you see it. The girl I know is very moral and believes in a god and has a good head on her shoulders. Plus we get along fairly well. So, is this legit? Maybe, but who knows? Just remember to carry with caughtion? Will it improve your relationships? I believe, this is a resounding yes,my relations with my brother improved significantly and we can talk much one to one than where I would normally would resent his success. I've merely made peace with it at this point. My other relationships seem to be ok. Will  you get smarter or stronger? Maybe, I've noticed large improvements in linguistic verboscity which I would only normally get from taking stimulant like medication. My muscles still feel moderately vibrant and I haven't seriously worked out in 2 months simply because I haven't had a consistent gym where I can workout at.  Am I as strong? Absolutely not. Did my grades go up? Nope, but then again I'm taking 20 units and 3 extracurriculars so I may be suffering from burnout but I'm still holding pretty decent grades most are B's, but I expect to being raising all these grades to A's sooner rather than later once i get my medication  but my stupid psychiatrist has been taking longer. 

 

                   6.  WHAT'S NEXT? I really don't know but just remember don't expect SR to be the end all treatment for everything. I'd give it about a year or two before you can make any real times of judgments on whether you actually benefitted. Worse case scenario, I feel much more clean and in control and natural and that feels WAY better than any type of addiction and above all my lifeforce is just simply to important to waste of on something stupid. As for myself? No idea, I may simply transfer universities again mostly because I'm sick of this city. It's too damn small for me and the job oppertunities are fairly limited. It's hard to say if SR has been helping me make good decisions? Has my ADHD gone away? Fuck no it hasn't, my impulsive spending is still their, my procrastination is slightly still their, my zoning out still happens and I still get bored very easily. Which PROVES beyond reason that I was USING a  PMO to self-medicate my underarousal which is what I've been speculating all along. Anyways, I may start updating once per month because most of the benefits seem to have flattened. I intend, to explore, sensory-deprivation tanks because my brother claims it cured him of his own ADD likes, symptoms which he has good proof off. Obviously, their is a definite possibility that he could be lying within those respects. Yet, he's been holding down a job for almost 1 1/2 years which is NOT common for him to do. He's also been clean of weed apparently for a year but I don't buy that shit for a second. Yet, I intend to do it to see what will happen and then I will explore  the holy bible because emily says I should see it. I think it's hilairious because I've studied many many religions but nonetheless this is what SR presses upon you.  TLDR/NOTHING NEW, NEW BENEFITS SLIGHTLY/GIRL I LIKE? OK?/// NO INCREASES WHY?// What's next?/Once a month UPDATE/Enemies+Friends/30/60/90/ What else???/Energy-Vampires IGNORE them/// FOCUS ON YOU


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#25 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 27 February 2019 - 06:27 AM

Small Update: 2-26-2019: 1.  I've finally achieved my goal of 30 days and seems that concerta helped with the goal but I haven't been  on it in 15 days because of my stupid psychiatrists who insists on continually testing me which is annoying as fuck.  Anyways, I've achieved PURE SEMEN retention and it seems that my theory on sexual transmutation has been proven false within some respects. I haven't had any excess energy or anything really all the benefits seemed to go away for some reason, I'm not really sure what it was or what was causing it.  As far as I can tell  I haven't had NO leakage or any loss of semen or WD(Wet Dreams). I was also eating pumpkin seeds and I think the ancedotal bullshit about it increasing your semen load is probably nonesense. One of the unique things that I noticed that always stops WD is once you wake up don't go back into rem sleep because this is when that disgusting filth will attempt to snatch you. In all of my dreams I STOPPED myself from desiring the smut. So I have won the battle both mentally in my dreams and in my reality as of right now. I haven't been eyefucking any girl doing anything or no bullshit so to speak.  I simply live my life and it seems fine to me.  Are my perceptions better? Nope, I haven't really seen any benefits other than what people call an extreme level of confidence, which I haven't really noticed.  Does my command or charisma improved? It seems to be hit or miss now. Somedays my powers of perception are magnified and others day they aren't. I'm starting to wonder if all this is just in my head. I've really no idea again. My dick no hurts like a motherfucker. It literally hurts to urinate and it's very painful to do.  No idea, what caused that and I don't really care. 

                                         2. So do the benefits matter? Not really but I suspect that taking showers seem to dim the semen retention benefits, so I would reccomend a shower every 3 days with NO shampoo for no longer than 5 minutes or I get this weird feeling. It could be something in the power and again this is pure speculation at this point. So  what else do I have for you? To be honest 30 days feels pretty uneventful. I feel no different just even more bored than ever before.  So my ADHD is the same.  PMO was NOT causing ADHD like I suspected by was merely a form of self-medication as anticipated. The only bright side is I have MORE WILLPOWER to not give in to impulsive and I have much much much more natural relationships with women. So much so, that I'm pretty confident I can easily get a gf if I really wanted to.  Again, I've never doubted my ability to GET one but to change my disgusting perceptions of reality vs falsehood is important. I still am shredded as fuck and have a 6 pack and blabla bla. It really doesn't mean anything to me.  I'm not saying this to brag I'm just stating that you shouldn't really be aiming for the GOAL, aim for the process and the process is what gets you their.

 

                                       3. What got me to 30 days? To be honest, it's really fucking hard to do this. It's like stopping heroine and I've been getting lots of headaches lately. My mind is always blank and I feel like shit for no reason.  Today I didn't have a single thought about anything I was just utterly empty. Which is welcomed sense my ADHD brain never shuts the fuck up.  So first thing, always sleep on your back do NOT, sleep on your stomach or you will overstimulate your urethra and fuck your streak.  Another alternative is to sleep on your side as well. You will get used to this you just need to train yourself. SEMEN retention requires PRACTICE like any other skill.  Those WD's that we all seem to get fucked by? It's simply stop looking any provokative material and accept the barren reality. No asmr, No instagram, no youtube. no reddit, just nothing. I have total access to google and could easily pull up immorality but I don't because I'm IN CONTROL. My next thing that helped me, is say this, "I'M NOT WASTING MY LIFEFORCE" say it over and over. It changes the perspective on the act that your doing so you really appreciate it more. When you have your DREAMS or fantasy's you are CREATING these fantasys because you subconciously want it. I stopped having them when I just gave in to the lifestyle as the new normal. When you have these dreams you need to take control of it and refuse that individual who tempts you. Your brain makes no distinction between dream perceptions and real perceptions. If you ejaculate in your mind you will do it in your body as well.  An example was a chick in my dream who wanted to give me a you know what and I she said RELEASE RELEASE yourself and I said fuck you, your not worth my time and this dream part of me got really really mad.  Then it kept demanding and I fucking told it I'm in charge and slapped the girl and the dream went away. YOU ARE IN CONTROL. WRESTLE your IMMORTALITY into submission like a stupid fucking dog. This is self-discipline.  Maslow tells us that we must DOMINATE OUR SELF, so what we want is what we GET. Finally, I unintentionally discovered how to orgasm without ejaculation it's very very very painful. Somehow, I stopped my muscle from wasting my LIFEFORCE like an IDIOT and still felt pleasure which was repulsive. YOU NEED TO REALIZE that their WILL BE A PART of you THAT will challenge you. I call it your EVIL self, you must kill this motherfucker. Make him your bitch and show him you mean business. These are all the tips I have for you. 

 

                                        Epilogue Note: I must say I'm very satisfied with my progress,  I did this in San Jose long ago last september but did it for all the wrong reasons. Now I'm enlightened and KNOW what I need to do and why I'm doing it. 30 days is 720 HOURS of NO anything. Be proud of your achievement, this IS NO simple feat and easily one of the hardest things any man can do. I'm determined to break my 45 day streak and see where the deepness of SR takes me on my journey to glory and wealth. 90 days is 2145 hours and will be my greatest challenge yet.  One tip, is to break down your goal into mini goals, like instead of 30/90. Do 30/45 and it will feel much much more doable and you won't feel as discouraged. Do I understand SEMEN retention and ST. Not really, and I still have much more learning to through before I can even comprehend any aspect of semen retention.    Oh and also you will find that the longer your streak goes the more and more "WEAPONIZED IMAGERY" is what I call it you will find will manifest in REAL LIFE. You will have chicks just flaunting everything they possibly can at you so you give them ATTENTION. Remember this, WOMEN are ALL ATTENTION  cravers. THEY need your attention infact, they crave it so much they WILL do anything and I mean anything to get that attention, so that they can get their own self-validation because they have been enslaved to their own looks which is equally pathetic. You will find chicks get ANGRY at you and be aggressive because your not in "line" like all the other dudes, as I like to call it. For example, before SR it was almost TABOO to talk about then all of a sudden they make sex jokes like crazy and talk about their inner gossip to me which NEVER EVER happens since, I mostly keep to myself. They come to me and demand to talk to me which is hiliarious. Oh and you will find people KNOWING somehow that you are retaining ESPECIALLY girls, they will KNOW it.  It's impossible to hide this so just accept this fact. However, you will find TRIGGERS, where they will do anything they can to get YOU back in control. That's right they will talk about sex this sex that, invite you over, you will get RANDOM messages from very attractive chicks that you DON'T even know. I simply just autoblock them now. It gets kind of old after a while, since I just see right through it all now.  My point is simply, the external REALITY will TEST YOU, it WANTS you to STAY the same, do not falter and do not give in. THEY NEED YOU, you don't NEED THEM. Think of it like the matrix and your neo you've disrupted the reality and everyone knows it. I've had some much drama and bullshit happen for no fucking reason and people start hating me despite me doing nothing. I've had points where I wanted to beat the living shit out of these pathetic ego's. Obviously, that wouldn't go well for me at least legally. I won't go much further, just remember the longer you go the greater your reality seems to change, which i have no way to explain. It simply just happens.  Oh and on a good note, I found a girl I like and seems to like me FOR ME, she's a christian and has a strong moral foundation. It's the same chick that friendzoned me like 6 months ago and she's a salsa dancer. So, she literally DROVE to MY apartment and offered to teach me about god which I agreed to because I need a deeper connection with Jesus christ. Maybe, he can give me some answers that I've missed.  It was just surprising because she wanted to come INTO my apartment and chat I guess, I basically fluked out like a bitch because I was uncomfortable how close she came to me. Their were 4 times where I wanted to kiss her which is a huge fucking improvement sense I'm always to much of a pussy. So IN A NUTSHELL SR, will IMPROVE your romantic intiative as well. That is all I have for you. ACCEPT THE PROCESS NOT THE RESULT.

 

                               /TLDR HIT MY GOAL/ACCEPT PROCESS NOT RESULT/ENEMIES/TIPS TO CONTROL SR/ USING IT TOWARDS YOUR ADVANTAGE/ MANAGE YOURSELF WELL/ SHIT-TESTS ARE COMMON ETC.


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#26 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 03 March 2019 - 04:21 PM

SLIGHT update Until day 45, I'm on day 35 with no semen loss as far as I can tell. Slight update, so I was rejected again which isn't really a surprise which is basically a friendzone which is fine. So with that last tad bit of information, I no longer will be staying in moscow, idaho any longer and will probably be  moving on simply because their is nothing left for me here anymore. So, it's been a fun ride sense I've been here, I'm still satisfied and impressed at my ability to retain my lifeforce. In other news, I need to get my phone consumption to level that's normal right now it's a bit out of control so maybe I'ver overcompensating still who knows. I feel like my ADHD has gotten worse post Semen retention ironically but that doesn't really matter to me anymore. My intiative has improved significantly to testing and getting what I want. Typically I despise rejection but I was anticipating it. Not gonna lie it still stings like a fucker but oh well.  For all those that doubt SR trust the process and not the end goal nor benefits. Keep your head down and keep grinding to the stone. Hell doesn't last forever. The sun is finally out in moscow and the winter is over. Whereever you are, remember that suffering is your mechanism for glory. Goodluck


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#27 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 21 March 2019 - 02:58 AM

03/20/2019

 

                            1. Greetings longecity forum, so I've been a little late on this update but nonetheless, I will continue onward as what is appropriate. So I've attained the mark of 52 days which exceeds any record that I've ever done before because I'm resolutely determined to achieve all my potential that should be possible. I've also finally gotten medicated albeit with some negative side effects that came in the way of that which is of significant concern but I will continue onward. So what do I have for longecity forum today in relation to semen retention? Have I achieved any of extraordinary effort? Has their been an increase of achievement in my own ability to perform? Has the ADD been dealt with? Absolutely not, nothing has changed within these narrow respective outcomes. The addiction has all but desisted but my mind still feels as sexual as ever and I feel more angered and sexually frustrated. So this much mean that I'm not sexually transmuting as much energy as I should be transmuting. Do Not give in to the weakness of the now. Their is no perpetuation where you run back to the sameness of where you found yourself. None of these things really ever happen as a result. Your only rigid concern is your own ability in being able to manage yourself is what you should be concerned about. Even moreso, now than EVER, I find myself with girls everywhere that want YOUR attention, they are absolutely craving it. They want this attention so bad because it validates themselves as you validate your own sexual urges when you waste your life-force within the conditional respects of being able to control and manage yourself accordingly. Has my charisma stayed? Nope, not really.  Has that magnetism occurred that I previously talked about at the very start? Absolutely not, it's no longer their anymore. I really don't know how to describe this state of being. It feels as if everyone AROUND you KNOWS theirs something different about you and they know that you have mastered this aspect of yourself. They will absolutely hate you for this and they will do everything in their power to make sure you BECOME the same.  For in your new state you would be uncontrollable and therefore a threat to their plans.

 

                              2. These might be ancedotal outcomes and you can simply ignore it but I do not believe in a coincidence. I don't believe in outcomes occurring simply because they occur but rather because of a difference within your perceived reality. I kept thinking I wanted my roomate gone and guess what? It fucking happened because your thoughts are your reality whether you want to believe it or not. If you think like a pervert then they will know it. It's an inescapable part of reality, that somehow people know that you know.  Somehow you will find yourself in strange coincedences that are no explainable but other than pure respective coincidences. Here's an anecdote, girls no more than ever are dressing ever sluttier and more immoral than ever before. Now this could simply be because it's getting warmer which could totally be correct but I don't think so. They may pine and pine for attention but do not give in. In order to be a master of your own sexual energy you must dominate and destroy your domain in all respects and all forms that you find yourself in. What else has semen retention given me? I really don't feel anymore different other than the ever evident issue of my inability to transmute my energy more efficiently. You need TRANSMUTE your energy or you will go crazy. Transmute, Transmute, Transmute. You must NOT let your mind find to the delays of impulsion and often we fall  to these impulsive delusions under many primary grounds. Frankly, from all that I have to report it seems that the excess sexual energy may simply be a placebo but it's very hard to say. Even if it is , that also doesn't matter because your goal is to absolutely dominate your domain and be immune to everything for you will be the one in control. You will not be enslaved by the domains of gratification which it seems is the case that so many of us are finding ourselves in. Keep going. My goal after I hit 90 will be 180 next and then I will report to you and see if their are any of these so called proclaimed superpowers.

 

                                 /TLDR FEEL THE SAME, CONTINUE ONWARDS, Environment seems to be getting more SEXUAL, STRENGTHEN YOUR RESOLUTION EVEN MORE:


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#28 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 27 March 2019 - 05:19 AM

3-26-2019: 58/60    

 

                                                   FLATLINE

 

   1. Greetings longecityforum, it's been a few days since, I last updated you to whoever is still even bothering to read this or to whom even finds it still entertaining to subject myself to this torture. Anyways I'm 2 days away from hitting 60 days or 2 months of semen retention which will have been my greatest achievement as of late. I attribute this mostly to medication and ironically it hasn't really been working very much objectively from a standpoint of producitivity. At least not as far as I can tell within this general respect. So it was my ORIGINAL PURPOSE to tell you is SR real or NOT? Can you sexual transmute your energy? The answer is unclear still  because I suspect I'm going to be going through the more interesting phase of Semen retention or the so-called flatline. I believe this is what I'm experiencing.  I don't really know how to describe it but it's like my mind and my soul is empty. Their is nothing within my mind and I'm merely going through the motions of the day and then the next day and the next. This could be simply because I was on medication and this is a small town but then again normally even when I did fornificate towards immorality I was MORE lively than I am now. It almost feels like I'm getting stupider for whatever reason. I'm not really sure how to describe it.

         2. WHAT TO EXPECT OF THE FLATLINE? Expect to feel like your general attraction for women will still be their but you will simply be empty shell. You will also realize, that despite all your efforts that your life is going NOWHERE and you need to do something SIGNIFICANTLY different to change your life but your really not sure what that is. On day 50 and onward your cravings will go through the roof and you might be tempted to go back but you just need to simply triple down on your life-force and maintaining that within your body as much as you possibly can. In the flatline you will begin to question yourself because the benefits that you had on the first 20 days are gone and you feel like your simply torturing yourself for no reason. You will feel invisible again and a bit lethargic with a lack of drive as if your almost confused or maybe that you've lost your identity, which is rather ironic when I say this. It's like your just nothing and their is nothing. You don't really talk to anyone and you don't really care. It might just be my own personality but I don't really give a fuck about the people at my University. You might see tons of attractive girls but you don't give a fuck. I can approach them but so what?  You feel like  your just existing and going day into the next day wondering. Is this what I did all that for? You will be angry, annoyed and desire comfort? You might eventually make a girl-friend only with hyphen only. That means you might develop a few girls that you talk to casually. You will probably get more comfortable with the opposite sex. I don't really know how to describe it. This flat-line just seemed to start happening around day 40 for whatever reason. Is  it pleasant? No, it's awful to be frank. 

          3. What are the Positives? Is it going to make you a genius? Fuck no, it's not and don't expect it to. I actually think my academic performance was WORSE on P than off but I don't give a fuck I'm going to do this with or WITHOUT benefits.  Don't expect magical wonderland on flateline. I suspect this is the long-term hell of where your literally going to waiting 3-6 months of  a nightmare until the supposed next phase comes. So for the benefits, first off you will have more girls who you casually talk to simply as friends. You might get more comfortable talking shit to girls in general. You probably won't have much an issue making a few real friends, who seem to like you for you. This may or not be a benefit, I'm simply stating observations. You might get invited out more to parties and your generally developing a real social life for once in your life. While in comparison to highschool, you'd be alone all day and night and be on your computer simply looking for the day to pass. People seem to be genuinly interested in you but then again you really won't give a fuck about them either.  Again this could be due to medication. You will BECOME AWARE that you are a LOSER or that your not very manly as you once thought you were. Little things will start to annoy you more like being incapable of controlling yourself. Your inability to pay your bills on time or being able to hold down a job in a sufficient manner. Other than that, you won't experience NO benefits other than these subtleness of the effects. Oh and your MIND will GO FLAT, you may be an overthinker like me but your analytical mind seems to have SHUT OFF but in a different way. I don't know how to describe. It's as if when you look as someone you feel nothing towards them. You say simply yes or no. Again this could be a byproduct of medication I've really no idea.  People might say your LOUD, your aggressive, your excited, your overbearing, your controlling, you become aware of your inner MAN. 

 

         4. MISCELLANOUS: You might become aware of small shit girls like that you were to much of a pussy to do before. Multiple chicks who would say, "I have a BF", I'd simply say I don't care I'm not attracted to you. Normally, I'd never say this because I was simply too passive but you will become more bold and you will be better able to hold your own self-worth without being affected. You might better be able to handle rejection with a chick and still be friends without letting it bother you. You will learn that girls like being dominated now don't quote me on this but this strictly from my observations dancing. It seems I've become more aggressive dancing for whatever reason and they really really really like aggressive dancers. Oh and when you talk shit about them they REALLY LOVE that, I have no idea why.  Again. whether this is SR or NOT I have NO IDEA this simply my take on my everchanging "mood" or evolution of "character" as I integrate that into my greater MANHOOD that will define my glory. So SR, MAY help you NOTICE what chicks ACTUALLY like, whereas before you might have been like, WTF do they want. Again, this could all be nonesense I wouldn't be surprised but it seems to me, the closer to SR you GO the closer you begin to unify with your inner feminine self simueltaniously as you become more masculine. Which makes sense, because when you degenerate your life-force and engage  in hardcore pornographic materials, your basically immasculaitng yourself and telling yourself your incapable of doing anything better than what you are doing RIGHT NOW. Which means you get farther away from your masculine energy and by extension you become disconnected from the feminine energy which by extension means your struggle to relate to women. So the more of a MAN you become the more you can RELATE with women. Strange how that works. For example, I've been hanging with girls way more and I discuss casual dating more with my "friends" and we all are actually discussing real life shit, like dating many girls at once, talking shit, going bar hopping. So it seems like that SR, GROUNDS you to worldly concerns and this is coming from a person who is perpetually stuck in his head as a by-product of ADHD.  So it seems to also help you take intiative more and getting comfortable with the idea of dating casually many women at once. This isn't the same as being a player.  You don't really give  a fuck if it leads to anything your simply dating because it's fun. This change seemed to only happen around the 40th day mark. Before that, I would NEVER talk about life-problems so casually and they would to me for advice when I really didn't have any answers anyways. 

 

            5. CONCLUSION: Make your life simple. It seems to me the longer you go on semen retention the more you begin to realize what really matters. Most of the chicks don't matter or mean shit. Not everything needs an expectation. All that instant-gratification, reddit and youtube really doesn't mean anything. It's really just a waste of time and you know it. We just entertain ourselves because we make excuses in are own lives for why are lives suck. Honestly, the longer I go the more I realize, I don't really care about any of the old shit I used to do, it's just more of a way of BEING A KID, FIGHT this urge. Your process is the new process of what you are BECOMING within your own manhood and your own man being that you BECOME. This could also be an age thing as well, since I'm only 22 but I've slowly started giving a fuck about the inessentials that DON'T MATTER. Let go of what you don't have control over. Surrender yourself to the PROCESS of BECOMING the best VERSION of yourself. Seize the moment and SEIZE the pain as a TOOL to guide you to your fucking glory. MEN DO SR not because their is A BENEFIT but rather to put yourself through PAIN so that you BECOME STRONGER. This is where I'm going at and I welcome the flatline as I welcome the next chapter of my life. Welcome SR as the new way of life and accept it like you accept the sun. Trust the PROCESS and NOT the RESULT. Rewards comes to those who wait.

 

                                  MISCELLANEOUS/ TRUST THE PROCESS/ GO ONWARD AND CONTINUE/ FLATLINE

 

     

 

 


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#29 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 04:02 AM

 1.  04-7-2019: 70/75 Days to go until I finally have completed my semen retention challenge of 90 days or 3 months of pure semen retention with my body and my own mind.  Within the context, of semen retention what has happended and what has changed? Well nothing really, I'm about to finish this semester of 23 units credit and about to pull a minimum of a 3.6444 assuming nothing goes wrong. Again, Have I really done anything all that differnetly and do I feel different? Fuck no, I don't. Frankly, it's hard to tell if semen retention is even working if at all. I've basically deleted my dating account because it felt pretty pointless tbh. I didn't notice any greater hits before or after but then again since, I'm effectively in the middle of nowhere for what it seems may be another 2 years depending upon how things go then, that outcome seems inevitable. Have I gained greater confidence and has their been any revolutionary change within myself? Not really, I've finally gotten a minor streak going with working out again despite, loosing a good deal of muscle and money, I will basically continue to do this until I die irrespective if I make any progress or not because it's the process that matters and not the end goal or expectation of what I'm chasing or why I'm chasing such outcomes. After loosing my roomate I've had some surprising assistance that seemed to come out of nowhere, which seems fine but I will have to pull some type of miracle at this rate to find some type of job stability which is what I'm  looking for right now in my own life. I've increase my medication dosage to 27 again and it basically did nothing as far as I could tell from a performance perspective, so that was a curiosity. Then again, I enjoy not being a zombie all day as that's not really all that an enjoyable of experience. I attribute my ability and my resilience to my constant drive to achieve glory and not GIVING up despite all that bad that may seem to happen or occurs in your own life. Ultimately I'm the master of my OWN fucking destiny and whatever I say will happen. So what has CHANGED? As far as I can tell almost nothing. Everyday in moscow, is just a day that seems to merge into another day with an ever continuous quiet if, you don't keep yourself busy here, you could easily go insane ESPECIALLY with SEMEN retention and  a LACK of women. 

 

2. TRUST THE PROCESS: As much as I want to say their are benefits to semen retention, I would say COMMIT, COMMIT, COMMIT, to your semen retention craft cutt down on all your inessentials and their should be a gradual development that happens overtime. For example, my ease with touching, talking to ladies, and dominating them increased substantially. I have the ability to hang out with them and go to their apartment. It's a  basic non-issue because I've transcended the limits of a beta-male to semi-alpha male. I'm  not quite their yet but I attribute semen retention for finally giving me a semblance of real relationships with a few girls I talk to on an off an on basis. Most of the conversations are basically effortless now. What else is there? I don't know really, other than the fact that you simply have to believe, somewhere somehow you can MAKE YOUR LIFE WORK. To say, that YOU CAN DO IT. If you just BELIEVE enough and work the path and don't WASTE that VITAL lifeforce and just stay the path then it all will be and end well within both of those contexts. I've had temptations even on the hardest of days but I will not waste my fucking life-force and go back to that shell of myself. It's simply not going to happen and I don't give a fuck anymore. Just make sure, that you avoid TRIGGERS, even at  almost 3 months it still happens, I suspect the longer recovery will be over a  year or longer before I totally recover from my own defiling of my mind and my body as well. Then you need to realize, that even if you don't get ANY BENEFITS at all, you need to realize, that it doesn't matter within that contexutal outcome.  So make you factor in both of these processes when you ask the question whether you trust the process or trust the product of what your really chasing?

3.  Benefits are Subtle: I don't really know how else to say i it other than the fact that much of the benefits of semen retention are purely on an objective level purely subtle. It becomes hard to discern what are the benefits and the bad benefits of semen retention within that contextual outcome. One benefit, I noticed is I talk better with women in general and I have a much better relationship. PERIOD. As I type this I, have a real functional friendship of a girl who friendzoned me and let me stay at her place and allowed me to wash clothes because I tell her about my problems occassionally. Within these respective levels and outcomes that to ME is progress. You may notice yourself openly saying a girl is hot and not feeling dirty as fuck or being a fucking creep for instance.  Above all semen retention, makes you not be a BITCH anymore. The best example, I've heard against immoral smut is the following, if you wish to me a lion, do you expect the fucking lion to watch naked lions all day and expect to get anything and then expect to be a lion. The answer is an absolute No. So, double down or even TRIPLE down on semen retention benefits, such that you self-actualize. The benefits are subtle and the more that I go onto this process and journey I'm starting to see the real effects. Before Semen retention, I had no real friends at Moscow, and all of a sudden I have probably 3 real people I could call upon AT WILL, if something ever came bad. I casually talk with ladies and above all it will MAKE you confident because you don't give a fuck. Period. You don't give a fuck and this is your power because the expectation is no longer limiting you.

4. ACCEPT THE GREATER SPAN OF TIME: Accept and surrender yourself to the pain of your own being. Accept the aspects of you that deny you your fucking glory. Accept the outcomes, by which require you to dominate yourself. Your own domination of yourself is your own implicit requirement so that you  have the capacity to develop your agency and your outcome. Initiate your deep being. Initiate your truth and put yourself and your entirety of your being forward, so that you push beyond the 1 month and 2 month span. These spans are transitory within the terms of years. As a person with ADHD, I really don't comprehend these types of timeframes and a year feels like FOREVER but if I can do it so can you. Commit to the principles of retention. Trust the process even when you get NO results. Gain self-mastery for YOURSELF. Have ambition and fail again and again and again.  This is what semen retention has taught me and this is what I hope it teaches you. For the first time, I have a real femine relationship with my own internal self and their is a semblance of balance that I IDENTIFIED WITHIN ME and am WORKING on FIXING it. 

 

 

                          //TLDR CONTINUE THE PROCESS, NOTHING YET, SEXUAL-TRANSMUTATION, WHAT ELSE IS THERE?, KEEP GOING, NOT THE RESULTS, PROGRESS WITH RELATIONSHIPS AT LAST OK?

 

 


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#30 MichaelFocus22

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 08:36 PM

04-12-2019

 

                          1.  A brief update for whomever is still interested in the sexual process of transmuting your own energy for success, money or simply as a demonstration of your own domination over yourself. In this context day 75/75 has been hit and I've surpassed all other metrics within the relationship of managing these impulsivites that will probably not go away within those given respects. In other news,  Has anything really changed? I would say that I'm still in a flatline state with occassional urges and dreams of my own cravings but I'm currently in the process of cutting down on ASMR and my own phone usage and that will basically mark the few of my lastn existing addictions, that I've had to get rid of multiple of times. So the simplest question, AM I TRANSMUTING my energy? Is their an energy expenditure that is useful for myself? No, their was no increase in energy output as far as I can tell, Thus, it may simply be that ALL of the benefits of SR may just be placebo but I defineitly feel a considerable difference in personality shifting but it did nothing to remedy the ADD, I'm still as forgetful and distractible as before. It's really hit or miss at this point.  Will it improve your interpersonal relationships and will you gain a  healthier semblance of what naturalized relationships should be? This is an absolute, yes I've  developed a few solid female relationships when I'm off medications. I credit the medication for allowing for me to get this because without, it remains incredibly difficult. off meds I could only do maybe 20 days 25 days and relapse. Thus, my impulsivity is in check but that remains unclear if their is anything else that can be resolved.

                               2. Conclusion: I'm not going to be repetitious here, but for those who are new to the process, just continue grinding in this endeavour and continue battling those sexual thoughts and put that motherfucker into your control. Dominate it or you will become a slave to yourself. Should you relapse, don't be dejected just simply keep doing it and don't stop. Just continue grinding towards this habit and like everything else it will have some STICKING power whether you have ADHD or don't have ADHD, this is purely relativistic within that given context. Whether you get something or nothing doesn't matter, as long as you have mastered yourself then you can do anything else. It's intriguing to note, that most of this self-examination has simply lead me to go deeper into the process of becoming a man and I am still becoming. You should be aware that much of what it means to be a man has to do with being Responsible, having strong testosterone levels, having a mission, and working towards a greater future for yourself.  If you have examined, what society has done to the young man, they have weaponized entertainment AGAINIST you. They have weaponized  all instruments to channel the preferential aggression that drives young men into the digital world as a mechanisms of control . Think about it, if you could finally channel your aggression and anger into your real problems, instead of running away from them and finally address what's really bothering you then you would be a threat. Why does the Media portray living with your parents as OK? Why is it the norm ton watch ANIME and playing video games at 30? Is that really normal or is it really an extended adolescence?  Young men make revolutions. Young men are what build and change the fabric of societies. Young men die for their cause that they believe in.  Thus, recognize that when you are conditional self YOU are a threat and you make the rules. Semen retention is merely the extension of the greater process of becoming your own manhood and growing into yourself. 

          P.s It's also interesting to note, that squats seem to raise testosterone significantly and my facial hair has gotten much thicker and beard is way more fuller, which is strange. 

 

                               //TLDR CONTINUE ONTO THE PROCESS, SELF-MASTERY, YOUNG MEN ARE DANGERIOUS,  CONTROL YOURSELF, MASTER OUTCOMES, RANT AT END, ETC.

 

                              


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