LONGECITY

I copy past everything from my introduction.
Hi all!
First i am 22 years old. Exercise regulary, have a lot of friends and a gf. Just made my "matura"(its like the right to study in switzerland) and start to study veterinary medicine soon.
My journey began when i was 13. I smoked spice all by myself and had a really bad trip. I had chest tightness and a huge amount of anxiety and derealisation, which didnt go away after some days. I had 24/7 anxiety attacks and started to worry that i did permanent damage to my brain. Then i started to have dark toughts like "what if i imagine everything and i am all alone" or "what if everyone is an actor like in the trueman show". I realised that these toughts are not normal and the 24/7 anxiety was neither. I startet seeing a schoolpsychologist and that helped zero. After a while everything returned back to normal. For 8 years everything was fine and then i had a relapse. That was a year ago. I couldnt believe it, i tought i had worked through that and forgot about it. Well, it all came back at me. I saw a doctor as fast as i could, because i couldnt sleep for 3 days. I was then transferred to a psychiatrist. What happens when you see a psychiatrist and you mention such thoughts? Righg, schizophrenia is to consider. But the psychiatrist said i just dont seem to be schizophrenic. So i started to take 5mg olanzapine (yay 20kg weight gain) and 10mg escitalopram. I then got tested at a clinic, bloodtest, brainscan, neuropsychiatric performance etc. And then i got the diagnosis strong general anxiety disorder with mild depression. When i finally calmed down after some months, i started to taper off the olanzapine.( Right now at 1.75mg)
Of course when you are anxious and depressed you experience cognitive deficits, so i became interested in nootropics and supplements but i always stay away from stuff that messes with dopamine. Just in case.
Right now i have motivation problems, sleep like 12h/day, sometimes anxious, think alot about death and how to avoid it etc.

I take:
Morning methylfolate 800mcg
escitalopram 15mg
Ksm-66 300mg
Fishoil 1g
L-theanine 200m
NAC 600mg

Evening
Bacopa 500mg
1.75mg olanzapine
NAC 600mg
L-theanine 600mg

I also have coluracetam and fasoracetam.


I think i somehwhat fried receptors in the endocannabiniod system.

My anhedonia is explainable with my medication and it sucks. I think it also makes me lazy and a bit stupid. I will try to lower my escitalopram dosage when i got of the olanzapine and am stable. I then will try to use afobazole.

Bacopa is also not the best stuff for motivation, but i dont want to mess with it right now, because i think i benefitet greatly in other aspects.

Oxiracetam shouldnt raise dopamine much and provide a little boost. What do you think?

Sleeping with olanzapine is also shit. I need 12h to be well rested.

Excuse my english
Thoughts, concerns, etc?
Greetings

Sorry no one replied with anything constructive. These are very common symptoms. Have you tried the search? It works very well here.

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Yes, i tried the search. I will continue to search solutions to my problems. I just think sometimes i am alone with working it out. My psychiatrist is only fine in prescribing ssri's and antipsychotics. I mentioned metformin for the weight gain and he was like "nah, i never prescribted something for weight gain"
What ever

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Getting a script for metformin without diabetes is hard. Fortunately, there are online pharmacies.