Hi longecity, new here.
I have had symptoms of mood swings, described most accurately by the description of Cyclothymia, since early adulthood. The cause of this likely has a genetic component because my father seems to share the same basic symptoms as far as I can tell. It's almost uncanny to see such a mirror reflection of my symptoms in him albeit his symptoms seem to not veer as far into mania or depression as mine do.
In any case, I have experienced mood alterations consisting of mild 'depressive' symptoms and milder 'manic' symptoms with the depressive symptoms usually persisting anywhere from 1-2 weeks and the manic symptoms persisting only an average of 3 days to a week at best. Although, with the intervention of the uridine stack I have experienced a week-long up twice!
Lows:
During the depressive periods I have a pervasive uncertainty about everything I do and there is a sense of foreboding and melancholia in the air. My self-esteem is low and often I will avoid people to avoid perceived judgement. Motivation and energy deficit make simple tasks such as getting up and walking down the stairs to get a glass of water discouraging. I am extremely favorable to short dopamine spikes, getting small frequent bursts of motivation towards binging poppy music, wacky internet videos and sugary snacks, which give me a brief sense of euphoria. I also experience a deterioration in motor function because I am often clumsy, sometimes even losing my balance standing and underestimating my body's own inertia.
Focus and attention take a big hit too. I can't focus on a single task without engaging a million distracting toughs in the process. Irritability is clearly present here with even the anticipation of a possible distraction sets off a distraction internal rage. I am a little embarrassed of how this irritability makes me act sometimes; arguing with inanimate object and blaming others for essentially existing. The irritability flares up from the slightest inconvenience and persistent for far longer than it should.
My biggest pet peeve however is the handicap it gives to my working memory. Long-term planning is effectively non-existent and unappreciated. Listening comprehension is impaired and delayed. Speech and word retrieval is impaired and delayed. Sentences with double negatives make me feel like a bad AI calculating a paradox. Combined with the effect it has on my attention it definitely feels like 'brain fog'. Other symptoms like obsessive thought patterns and hyper-sexuality are also present and needless to say my sleep quality isn't as good. Anxiety sometimes too.
Highs:
Prior to my early 20s I did not experience any semblance of a high mood. In fact my symptoms back then where more like MDD, a dark age in my life where I was lucky to bathe more than once a week. Intervening with a ketogenic diet seems to be when triggered the symptoms to go from being typical of MDD to the more "swingy" state that they are now with actual highs and milder lows. That, and a little help from Rhodiola in managing the crippling anxiety I developed prior which I am glad to say I have mostly dealt with.
During the high mood I simply feel the inverse of the symptoms described above. Not exactly opposite. If depressive is a -6, then the up would be a 3 or a 4. But I am much more functional and rarely ever feel anything close to manic or euphoric. I especially love my appreciation for long-term planning and execution during this phase even if it is nothing fancy to a normal person.
But what I really want to talk about is some more recent interventions that have helped me and ask for your advice on what to do going forward to improve my functioning. I have had very good results with the Uridine stack in both lengthening and strengthening the up period and weakening the down period. I got the biggest hit immediately after starting the stack which eventually leveled at a slightly higher baseline. Not bad. Introducing Choline to the stack seems to have given me mixed to no result, though I have only trailed CDP-c. And like I said Rhodiola Rosea has been instrumental at managing the anxiety symptoms. I have tried a number of common nootropics as well but in all honesty these have been misguided attempts at addressing my cognitive deficits directly without treating the underlying problem. There is a place for them especially with things like NGF which is low in bipolar patients but not for now I think?
For the record I take:
200mg Uridine Monophosfate, sublingual, twice: evening and before bed
Over 700mg total DHA from Fish Oil
400UI Vitamin E
Good Multi-Vitamin
2 Zinc, Magnesium, Calcium Tablets, split
Started Trailing CILTEP 3 days ago but not noticeable effects yet. This is mainly for my working memory.
I have a few substances arriving next week which I am eager to try.
70% DHA fish oil to replace my current local brand which favours EPA.
Bacopa
EGCG
Cacoa Extract
Choline L-Bitartrate
and also
Aniracetam
Noopept
Phenibut
I'll let you guys know of any positive results.
Edited by offtoukraine, 17 September 2017 - 10:35 PM.