53 replies to this topic

[Animal]

Yeah, but believe me it's still pretty disconcerting and scary under that mindset. Hard to find meaning or care for anyone in a world that you aren't sure is real.

I've suffered from severe and prolonged derealization after heavy mescaline abuse and subsequent psychotic mania, and while I agree it is disconcerting, I did not find it scary in the least. If anything it was liberating, in the sense that I didn't fear illness, injury or death, not that I sought them out or anything, the concept just didn't deter me from behaving how I wanted to. Even though today the derealization has faded, I still retain that lack of fear, and it's actually something I'm grateful for.

None of us are sure that the reality we perceive is the absolute nature of reality as a whole. If anything quantum physics has taught us that human perception is a huge limiting factor on our understanding of higher dimensional mechanics, super-symmetry and Planck relations. Such that true reality exists wholly within transcendental divisions of perception, ours being but one limited aspect of such.

Anyway, the point I'm making is that our only choice is to react to what we experience. Does it matter if it's real? Not in a pragmatic sense. Real is such a relative term anyway.

[full_circle]

many claim that Nobel Prize winning genius Francis Crick concieved DNA's Double-Helix structure while on LSD. i have no personal Derealization/Depersonalization experience nor did i experiment with any mind-altering drugs, but i did have some lucid dreams in which i might have inadvertently gone through Derealization/Depersonalization-equivalent surreality: actually i just finished a novel based on a quite derealizing plot, which came to my mind during these dreams.

i can tell that you have good writing skills. why not write about whatever you are going through? this might jump-start a constuctive cycle: write - then dream about that writing - write about that dream about the writing - dream about that writing about the dream about the writing - on and on.

masterpieces throughout history were written by agonizing authors and these masterpieces would have never been realised w/o the agony.
just a thought...

Edited by full_circle, 27 March 2010 - 01:42 AM.

[Animal]

many claim that Nobel Prize winning genius Francis Crick concieved DNA's Double-Helix structure while on LSD.

Psychotropic drugs have been an influencing factor on so many creative breakthroughs it's ridiculous, I have no trouble believing Crick was inspired by some sort of psychedelic. These sorts of substances are a part of human existence on an intrinsic level, sadly sobriety just isn't that conducive towards abstract thought.

[Spectre]

I think DMT can be definitely ruled out as having directly caused any physiological mental problems. Did the stress/trauma of the bad trip cause any permanent physiological problems quickly enough that they were evident right after your trip? I don't know enough about PTSD to say.

I think it's likely that the psychological stress and the derealization were the cause for all of the symptoms that you noted shortly after the trip and before spending much time on any medications. I think you should primarily deal with the derealization, not your various symptoms, weather through drugs or therapy.
I've dealt with a little bit of derealiztion from a bad trip on Salvia. I would recommend doing your best to rationalize your way out of it. Remind yourself every day that it's just bullshit, a condition that you have, and notice that each day you get up the exact same world is there to greet you.

Bump to this thread..

What type of "derealization" effects did you get after your Salvia trip? I believe it has caused a permanent change in my brain chemistry and has been causing memory dysfunctions in my brain, which has stuck with me ever since (almost 2 years now, but I'm not sure if it's attributed to either Salvia or DXM, or both of them). Has anyone else had similar experiences from Salvia Divinorum? Thank you.

[tdmonster99]

UPDATE

So it has been been a little over 1.5 years since my DMT trip that brought about DP/DR and I have had some positive and negative experiences. As of right now, I am no using any pharms because I am able to function at a rather sufficient level without them. However, here is what I have tried and their effects:

Citalopram: Ran this for about 6 weeks. Typical decline in sexual function and apathy of mood. It did dramatically alleviate anxiety and obsessive thoughts but the emotional blunting was not worth it. Also, sedation was just too much even during the 6th week (20mg/day)
Clonazepam: Single handedly the most effective treatment for the anxiety aspect. However, decline in cognitive function, memory recall etc wasnt worth it during the school year. Also emotionally blunting. Typically .5mg eod.
Buproprion XL HCl: 150mg/day. More effective than citalopram for depressive symptoms but highly anxiogenic and made DR worse.

Right now my medication is exercise, sleep and some supplements such as ashwagandha, SAMe (which has been helpful for depressive symptoms), magnesium malate and sublingual B complex.

However, I found a thread from MM that almost nearly matches my symptoms, even the depersonalization http://www.mindandmu...p...=37375&st=0

I would also like to add that I finished a 6 month course of Accutane about 1 month prior to my initial DMT experience and I did notice some cognitive issues at that point; however, impairment was NO WHERE near the severity post DMT. I'm usually a good writer and words come very easy to me but it was like torture trying to write a simple paper.


My current plan of attack is to ask my psych about Buspirone and Concerta. Buspirone has a low side effect profile and could be a good alternative to benzodiazapenes. Concerta (methyphenidate) has many anecdotal reports from dpselfhelp.com as being very efficacious for people who had difficulty performing cognitive tasks that were normally easy to achieve before DP/DR. I just graduated from college and I'm taking a year off then pursuing Physical Therapy; emotionally I'm beginning to feel closer to "baseline" but academic and cognitive tasks are very challenging, and I dont mean that as an excuse, I am comparing myself prior to DP/DR.

[unregistered_user]

For what it's worth, I took accutane for quite sometime as a teenager and also experience attentional and depersonalization problems. I won't go into great detail here but I wonder if there is any causal relationship between Accutane and those issues...

Edited by semi-retarded-individual, 23 June 2010 - 07:52 AM.

[outsider]

You seem to have a problem with your 6th (third eye) and 7th (crown) chakras caused by your experience.

Psychedelics work on the crown chakra and Bacopa works on the crown chakra too...

The crown chakra, Sahasrara is said to be the chakra of consciousness, the master chakra that controls all the others. Its role would be very similar to that of the pituitary gland, which secretes hormones to control the rest of the endocrine system, and also connects to the central nervous system via the hypothalamus. The thalamus is thought to have a key role in the physical basis of consciousness.

The Ajna Chakra, or Third eye, is linked to the pineal gland. Ajna is the chakra of time and awareness and of light. The pineal gland is a light sensitive gland, that produces the hormone melatonin, which regulates the instincts of going to sleep and awakening. It has been conjectured that it also produces trace amounts of the psychedelic chemical dimethyltryptamine (DMT).

[...]

Perhaps the most psychologically dramatic and potent secretion of these glands is the psychedelic drug DMT (which is synthesized by the pineal gland, corresponding to the brow chakra). At least in the West, some individuals have sought spiritual breakthroughs through the use of such chemical aids, occasionally referred to as entheogens in this context. (See for example: Aldous Huxley, The Doors of Perception, a classic of new-age spirituality.)

and then

The weakening of ego boundaries is again an effect of increasing the activity of the crown chakra. In this case, it is not so much that the ego is loosened but that the ego is seen in its proper perspective in the totality of our organization as a human being. Again, this is an effect of the integration function of the crown chakra. The ego (which effectively is our personal identity) is but one facet of our being. In our day to day life however, we tend to over emphasize our ego at the expense of other facets of our being. Again, the hallucinogenic stimulation of the crown chakra only serves to put things in a realistic perspective.

[Mindweaver]

i currently take noots that encourage plasticity to be proactive. of course moderation and no drugs is better.

Which nootropics encourage plasticity? Not denying that you're taking them, I'm curious for myself!


To the OP: I read the book "DMT: The Spirit Molecule," and you probably just have a lingering bad trip. From what I have read, DMT causes no physiological damage to the body/brain, (your Pineal Gland naturally excretes it during sleep, birth, death, near death experiences, out of body experiences, alien abduction experiences, etc.) so the chances that you actually suffer from physiological brain damage is slim to none... Are there chances that what you smoked was laced, perhaps with PHP? Yes, but again, slim to none. Chronic/obsessive thinking is one of the major issues with depersonalization/derealization, because you're always reality testing (I suffered DXM-induced depersonalization for over a year and a half, and still experience hints of it today). My biggest piece of advice would be, get the information you need from this website, and jump off the net with this stuff. The more you're exposed to it, the more you think about it, and the more that it becomes daily routine. Go exercise, immerse yourself in activities that make you happy and distract you from thinking about your brain. Get a regimen in Nootropics/Supplements going and keep with it until you feel like your brain is functioning optimally. I recommend things like Ginkgo Biloba, Piracetam, ALCAR, as they all have mechanisms of action for either getting more oxygen to the brain or enhancing long term/short term memory formation and recall.

[tdmonster99]

For what it's worth, I took accutane for quite sometime as a teenager and also experience attentional and depersonalization problems. I won't go into great detail here but I wonder if there is any causal relationship between Accutane and those issues...

I actually took a 5 month course of Accutane and finished around the same time as my DMT experience. During the course of Accutane I did notice some cognitive deficits such as problems writing; words wouldn't come to me as well and I couldn't formulate ideas as well. However, I didn't experience any of the DP/DR symptoms that came after trying DMT.

To Guru, I know the DMT was not laced because I synthesized it myself. Sometimes I wonder if any of the chemicals used to synthesize DMT could've played a role. I used a clear lightbulb to smoke the DMT and a lot of DMT was crystallized on the bulb and maybe some other nasty stuff.

In regards to the pharmaceuticals, I tried Concerta and Buspirone to mixed results. MPH is not the answer, not sure why I would think that. While the initial dose did make me hyperfocus like mad and corrected certain attentional issues, over time it wasn't effective or sustainable. I became too irritable, the effects were inconsistent and the crash resulted in worse depressive symptoms. I can tell my brain chemistry is vastly different now because I had my brother and mom try a Concerta 27mg tablet and they barely noticed an effect, whereas it was very powerful for me on first dose. Buspirone has been slighlty effective for the GAD symptoms and is possibly something I would keep, mostly for its inexpensive price.

I do believe this is purely psychological because I have had days where I felt so close to normal but then the next day I relapse to previous state. OCD could be what keeps me in this state and breaking that cycle is important.

I have another psych appt. next Thursday and I'm gong to try escitalopram 5mg and d-amp. After that I'm done experimenting with pharmacotherapy and will just live life

[Spectre]

For what it's worth, I took accutane for quite sometime as a teenager and also experience attentional and depersonalization problems. I won't go into great detail here but I wonder if there is any causal relationship between Accutane and those issues...

I actually took a 5 month course of Accutane and finished around the same time as my DMT experience. During the course of Accutane I did notice some cognitive deficits such as problems writing; words wouldn't come to me as well and I couldn't formulate ideas as well. However, I didn't experience any of the DP/DR symptoms that came after trying DMT.

To Guru, I know the DMT was not laced because I synthesized it myself. Sometimes I wonder if any of the chemicals used to synthesize DMT could've played a role. I used a clear lightbulb to smoke the DMT and a lot of DMT was crystallized on the bulb and maybe some other nasty stuff.

In regards to the pharmaceuticals, I tried Concerta and Buspirone to mixed results. MPH is not the answer, not sure why I would think that. While the initial dose did make me hyperfocus like mad and corrected certain attentional issues, over time it wasn't effective or sustainable. I became too irritable, the effects were inconsistent and the crash resulted in worse depressive symptoms. I can tell my brain chemistry is vastly different now because I had my brother and mom try a Concerta 27mg tablet and they barely noticed an effect, whereas it was very powerful for me on first dose. Buspirone has been slighlty effective for the GAD symptoms and is possibly something I would keep, mostly for its inexpensive price.

I do believe this is purely psychological because I have had days where I felt so close to normal but then the next day I relapse to previous state. OCD could be what keeps me in this state and breaking that cycle is important.

I have another psych appt. next Thursday and I'm gong to try escitalopram 5mg and d-amp. After that I'm done experimenting with pharmacotherapy and will just live life

Wow, a light bulb?..that seems extremely dangerous. What other chemicals could have possibly been left on the bulb when you smoked the DMT? The cognitive decline could be attributed to something else entirely if toxic chemicals were indeed left on the bulb. How much DMT did you smoke at that time? And did you take anything else that day by any chance? (ie: an MAOI).

Edited by Spectre, 24 June 2010 - 04:33 AM.

[winston]

I think DMT can be definitely ruled out as having directly caused any physiological mental problems. Did the stress/trauma of the bad trip cause any permanent physiological problems quickly enough that they were evident right after your trip? I don't know enough about PTSD to say.

I think it's likely that the psychological stress and the derealization were the cause for all of the symptoms that you noted shortly after the trip and before spending much time on any medications. I think you should primarily deal with the derealization, not your various symptoms, weather through drugs or therapy.
I've dealt with a little bit of derealiztion from a bad trip on Salvia. I would recommend doing your best to rationalize your way out of it. Remind yourself every day that it's just bullshit, a condition that you have, and notice that each day you get up the exact same world is there to greet you.

Bump to this thread..

What type of "derealization" effects did you get after your Salvia trip? I believe it has caused a permanent change in my brain chemistry and has been causing memory dysfunctions in my brain, which has stuck with me ever since (almost 2 years now, but I'm not sure if it's attributed to either Salvia or DXM, or both of them). Has anyone else had similar experiences from Salvia Divinorum? Thank you.

Sometimes while high, or about to go to sleep, i'll suffer from thoughts like "what am I but a voice in my head? what do I have to do with these memories, or this body? and when he goes to sleep, won't I die? I mean there won't be a little voice in his head when hes sleeping... and when he wakes up, his brain will make a new voice which will be very very similar to me.. but in the end nothing more than a clone"

I try to argue against it with the logical part of my brain, but not with much success.

[chilp]

To the OP:

It may seem counterintuitive but I would go to seek the help of a Shaman in the Amazon. Ayahuasca combined with a skilled shaman can help you with that.

[Spectre]

I think DMT can be definitely ruled out as having directly caused any physiological mental problems. Did the stress/trauma of the bad trip cause any permanent physiological problems quickly enough that they were evident right after your trip? I don't know enough about PTSD to say.

I think it's likely that the psychological stress and the derealization were the cause for all of the symptoms that you noted shortly after the trip and before spending much time on any medications. I think you should primarily deal with the derealization, not your various symptoms, weather through drugs or therapy.
I've dealt with a little bit of derealiztion from a bad trip on Salvia. I would recommend doing your best to rationalize your way out of it. Remind yourself every day that it's just bullshit, a condition that you have, and notice that each day you get up the exact same world is there to greet you.

Bump to this thread..

What type of "derealization" effects did you get after your Salvia trip? I believe it has caused a permanent change in my brain chemistry and has been causing memory dysfunctions in my brain, which has stuck with me ever since (almost 2 years now, but I'm not sure if it's attributed to either Salvia or DXM, or both of them). Has anyone else had similar experiences from Salvia Divinorum? Thank you.

Sometimes while high, or about to go to sleep, i'll suffer from thoughts like "what am I but a voice in my head? what do I have to do with these memories, or this body? and when he goes to sleep, won't I die? I mean there won't be a little voice in his head when hes sleeping... and when he wakes up, his brain will make a new voice which will be very very similar to me.. but in the end nothing more than a clone"

I try to argue against it with the logical part of my brain, but not with much success.

Wow, that's a very interesting thought concept..it almost sounds as if your conscious and subconscious morphed into one (at least that's the best way I can describe my experience with it). Salvia gave me all kinds of delusions and memory dysfunctions, yet it seemed to open up a door in my mind to where I became clairvoyant..it's probably the most confusing drug I've ever taken in terms of actual psychological effects and it's definitely nothing to be taken lightly..it can definitely be a life-changing experience (be it good or bad). I personally never look forward to using it again.

[Spectre]

To the OP:

It may seem counterintuitive but I would go to seek the help of a Shaman in the Amazon. Ayahuasca combined with a skilled shaman can help you with that.

Not trying to hijack the thread, but have you ever experienced Ayahuasca before? I've actually been planning on trying it sometime sooner or later and would rather take it with an Amazonian Shaman down in Brazil than trying to make it myself and venturing out alone (if I can ever get enough funds allocated to let me do this of course). I've read all over erowid that Ayahuasca can, in a sense, "heal" your spirit and mind..but I've never tried anything that powerful and have no clue as to how it could potentially affect me later on.

[tdmonster99]

To the OP:

It may seem counterintuitive but I would go to seek the help of a Shaman in the Amazon. Ayahuasca combined with a skilled shaman can help you with that.

Yeah, I'll book a trip to Brazil right now lol. I actually agree with what you said but it isn't practical at this stage in my life. I also can't imagine a DMT trip lasting hours, because 5 minutes alone is a mindfuck. However, I have that hippy mindset I need to go back to that mindspace and confront whatever issue tormented me. Glutton for punishment, probably.

To Spectre, I know the idea of smoking out of a lightbulb seems dangerous but it was thorughly cleansed and is a common method used by the peeps on bluelight.ru and was suggested on erowid, not that those sources are the bastions of safety and health. I smoked out of the lightbulb about 5 times with no problem, it was something about my last trip that made shit go nuts. And I'm quite certain i didn't use any MAOIs that day or around that time period but i'm not 100% sure.

I knew something was wrong because the comedown is always very rapid and returns to baseline, but for this last trip I was worried because it was the end of the trip but everything didn't return to "normal". I was like this is taking longer than usual.

Edited by tdmonster99, 24 June 2010 - 10:22 PM.

[tdmonster99]

Some updates on treatment and progress.

I'm trying to transition to a more minimalistic approach to treatment and im beginning to find that sweet spot. Right now I take Lexapro 5mg ED and Buspar on and off, im still not convinced of its efficacy yet. My plan was to combine an SSRI with amp, which in this case was Adderall. Initially I was blown away, I felt i resumed to the peak of my pre-DMT abilties. I did experience euphoria from my initial dose of 10mg 2xday. The second day was still great but already developing a tolerance to the mood altering effects which of course is to be expected. However, I soon realized this was not going to be an effective treatment for my condition. By the 4th or 5th day I lost all of the beneficial aspects of amp and only wakefulness remained. The comedowns were rough, it obliterated my speech capabilities. I was unable to carry on intelligent conversations and formulate new concepts. And this was happening during the dose too. I could only just agree with people and say "Yes", "Ok" etc. So I quit the Adderall and turned my head towards nootropics and I've find a combo that has pretty much restored my cognition

Right now my supplementation consists of the following:

Morning: ALCAR 500mg, Fish Oil, Vitamin D3 6,000IU, Zinc picolinate 50mg, Vitamin B Complex, NAC 600mg
Noon: Fish Oil
Night: Lexapro 5mg, Fish Oil, magnesium malate, ALCAR 500mg

ALCAR has been a godsend. Many of the verbal problems i complained about in my in original post have dissipated and I continually see more and more positive effects. So at this juncture, my interest is to continue treating my depressive and derealization symptoms. Lexapro has been doing a good job at improving depression, only negative sides are slight sedation and apathy, both of which are improving. As of right now, the symptoms bothering me are slight anhedonia, feeling tired most of the time and ADHD-I symptoms. I feel like most of these are somewhat being covered by Lexapro.

But the main issue that still persists is derealization; not just the mental aspect of dissociation but also visual symptoms. I experience photophobia and a small degree of visual snow, noticeable in dark conditions and especially when looking at the night sky. When the DR is bad it feels as if things are moving fast, not in fast motion but rather and that i cant integrate everything, like feeling overwhelmed. Sunglight seems so much brighter, too bright. I honestly dont know how to approach this besides meditation, exercise and time. I don't mind trying meds but my experiences are now telling me they wont bring about a holistic change WRT derealization.

A lingering question I have is why do I respond so drastically different to chemicals now. Before DMT i could take 1g of caffeine and be fine, besides the normal responses to such a high bolus of caffeine. If I were to take 1g of caffeine now I would get crazy derealized and anxiety would go through the roof. Even 200mg can moderately increase derealization and anxiety Amphetamine back in the day would probably have been well tolerated with no side effects, but now its a nightmare.

[Wylie]

There is a chance that I have an incredibly mild case of HPPD, in which case levitaracetam (Keppra) has been the most effective treatment. I just dont buy that I have full blown HPPD; I don't have any afterimages, visual snow, floaters etc. DP/DR most closely fits my symptoms. I am more than content to let time heal this disorder. And to Algear Linebra, I don't think what I have falls under the classical definition of PTSD. But like you said, I wouldn't rule it out since DP/DR shares many of the same neurological symptoms as PTSD.

I think you're right about this. I had pretty severe HPPD (and still do, but not severe) and had quite a few friends with it (traveled in psychedelic circles back in the day ) from massive doses of mushrooms (never did DXM), and what you describe is absolutely nothing like HPPD.

It's possible to have both, but in my own experience HPPD is not nearly as bad (and completely different) than what you describe.

Edit: Shouldn't be posting this late at night I was thinking you'd been drinking cough syrup. I actually have done DMT (but not DXM). I'm wondering if the last trip, you got one of the "research chemicals" that were really popular a few years ago. These were chemicals no one had ever heard of, so they were passed off as known drugs like LSD, mescaline, or DMT. The problem is they were much more toxic than those drugs. I don't doubt your experience, but I've never heard of (true) DMT causing anything like this.

I'm sure you thought outsiders post about chakras was wack, but it's something you should take into consideration.

Edited by Wylie, 22 July 2010 - 08:17 AM.

[Wylie]

but the side effects of drowsiness and emotional blunting are starting to take a toll...

The point of this thread is that since that last trip, my memory has become impaired along with focus to some degree. I am currently a senior in college, and my grades are fine, but my mental capacity just isn't what it was pre-DMT. My recall is very spotty and my verbal fluency can be poor at times...

Also, recently, my sleep patterns have been awful; they always were but moreso now. I am very sleepy if I don't get a solid 8+ hours of sleep. There is no way I can go through a day without a nap. I probably only get 5-6 hours of quality sleep...

Again, I don't doubt your experience, but this makes me think that the prescriptions are making this issue worse. It's even possible they could be causing it entirely (if the time you started overlapped with a recovery period from the trip). They could interfere with the normal processing that would happen after such a hard trip. These issues become very complicated when taking multiple prescriptions.

[The Likud Is Behind It]

I wrote a paper analyzing the phenomenon of ego death at the eventual peak of a psilocybin experience from a phenomenological perspective. I never came across any reports of depersonalization.

I feel sorry for you. I guess every now and then psychedellics can mess someone up, but I think it's more likely that they were predisposed for it and the intensity of the experience messed with their heads. Especially if you aren't deliberately and carefully choosing your set and setting in a ritualistic manner.

Non-resistance. Accept it like you've been born with it because now it's like you have. When you stop looking for something and being aware of it, the phenomenon becomes less intense. The mind-body self-awareness connection is pretty powerful.

Edited by bmud, 28 July 2010 - 03:21 AM.

[dolo]

Can I bump this. I too have had a similar experience with DMT, and am still getting over it.
To the topic starter do you mind if I ask what the trip was about?

I did Pharmahasca which is basically using Ayahuasca's core ingredients, which lasted for hours. In a nutshell what happened was when the trip was peaking I saw tiny aliens like greys with my eyes open, everywhere, with weird techno-like music or sounds. It was like they were communicating with me, and I felt like I was being abducted, though I knew where I was. It intensifies and I can barely think for myself as my mind was overloaded with alien thoughts. So these voices tell me I've used dmt to awaken from the reality simulator, and I'm seeing a white space with dark figures looking over me. They tell me I volunteered to go in it, then if fact it was me who built it. They say I created them too to watch over it or work it. At this point I'm freaking out, it might not sound so bad but so much is going on and this is what I vividly remember. I become majorly suicidal and want to shoot myself, also my thoughts are scrambled but hyped up because of dmt so I'm thinking the same thoughts over and over and seeing them happen vividly even with my eyes open so I'm seeing my head been blown up many times. The aliens say go ahead but I'll only end up in the empty space or void where nothing exists and be lonely, and that it was me who created everything with my thoughts because I was lonely. Another thing that was happening was I was being driven to some ultimate truth, they kept asking me if I wanted to know and saying they were going to tell me. The more they kept pushing the more I could feel my sanity slip away, so I fought it as much as I could. Then I ended up having ego death, and slowly coming back to normal.
The DMT caused DP and DR and I felt it strongly the day after. It's been a few months since and it's slowly decreasing, I'm back to some normality. I kept wondering if I'm creating what I sense and feeling if my mind is being controlled by an outside force, or thinking have I lost it. Searching for answers doesn't help much when you think you might be creating it or that outside forces are planting it there. Feeling like I'm in The Truman Show except that I know it. I'm almost back to normal but sometimes the thoughts pop up and I spiral into depression and fear for half an hour or so. Or I hear sounds or see images and it brings me back. I think I got amnesia for some parts of it, and then I get flashbacks and think DMT. That's one hell of a drug, but thats all it is, it just messed up our minds. I hope you get better.

ALCAR has been a godsend. Many of the verbal problems i complained about in my in original post have dissipated and I continually see more and more positive effects.

What was your speech like related to known speech impediments? I'm wondering if it could help people with speech impediments.

Edited by dolo, 29 November 2011 - 08:02 PM.

[ElusiveMind]

AFOAF feels for you tdmonster99. They had an experience like that too which rattled them to the bone for a while. It didn't affect them that long though, as they believe it was the mindset of being reborn (if you will) after the trip imminent.... that is probably saved their sanity.

Coming to accept any and all changes after such an experience is important. They never had to deal with an anxiety meds or other forms of meds to cope with the experience, but definitely expressing the experience (if gone wrong) is NEEDED. Write poems and short stories or poems, draw, etc. That always helped AFOAF deal with difficult trips.
The last step is to reflect upon those poems, drawings, memories, etc. Don't shut your mind down once you've expressed that experience or all the knowledge, pain, bliss, fear, etc will be drawn back into mind.

AFOAF and I hope you recover by accepting what you have become from the experience and grow from there.

Pce,
ElusiveMind

P.S. Sorry if AFOAF or I could not suggest a medicinal remedy for what ails you, but they haven't had to deal with something this long lasting so have not looked into remedies too much. One this AFOAF would suggest is doing a little aromatherapy with lemon essential oil. It is a POWERFUL anti-depressant and just pumps new life and AFOAF if they are down.

Study: http://www.sciencedi...166432806002798

[ElusiveMind]

I had a good post about how AFOAF dealt with their bad trip, but it seems it didn't post...?

Anyways, the important bit for you may be try using lemon essential oil with aromatherapy. It is a powerful anti-depressant and pumps AFOAF full of life if they feel down.

http://www.sciencedi...166432806002798

Pce,
ElusiveMind

[tdmonster99]

Sure, I have some answers. During that final trip I don't remember specific visuals but there were no alien encounters. All I remember is extreme happiness at first. I was with all my friends and family and I was revisiting the happiest moments of my life, it seemed I reached a point of enlightenment or some shit. Eventually the trip turned sour and I remember fading in and out of visuals seeing myself in the third person as a "junkie" sitting in my living room at the time smoking DMT out of a light bulb and it brought on the worst memories and played on my insecurities at that moment. And I distinctly remember when coming down that it was taking longer than usual. The visuals were gone but things didn't quite return to "normal" in terms of visual perception and processing. Emotional processing went relatively back to normal. My problem is not really the depersonalization aspect but rather with visual processing being different.

In regards to speech, DP/DR didn't alter my speech mechanics, instead it negatively impacted verbal fluency and clarity of thought. I don't have any diagnosed speech impediments so I have nothing to report on that front.

[Anewlife]

Having experienced and overcome this, dp dr is caused by anxiety, you can overcome it through facing all your anxieties.
It's not easy but eventually the dp dr just goes away.