Hi folks,
I`ve been suffering from bad or very bad phases of death anxiety since I was a child. I just cannot accept that my consciousness will end one day, forever, and that`s that. It`s driving me nuts and keeping me from enjoying my life (37 years old now, but this is making me older). Stuff like "everyone dies" and "you will not feel it" does not help one bit, because "not feeling it" is the worst I can imagine, I would prefer some sort of hell in fact because there I would at least "be" (I am convinced there is no hell ). Equally bad is the anxiety of dying before actual physical death by getting Alzheimers or bad vascular dementia or similar. I feel trapped in this body cursed with decay and demise.
Neither death nor brain sickness is avoidable or treatable at the current moment.
Does anyone else here have this problem? What did you do? Any medication you can recommend? I`ve been on SSRI`s, but had to stop due to serotonine syndrome. They tried SNRIs to, but it`s like swallowing candy, no effect whatsoever. Neuroleptica I will not take, too dangerous in the long run imo. Benzodiazepines work very nicely, but they are highly addictive so this is out of the question as well.
I feel for you. It is a question we all have to deal with because we live in a temporal universe and appear to undergo all the same conditions and laws of nature. We can do some things to extend life but never totally escape the end. I am no different than you.
Here are some of my approaches. Live for something which will give your life meaning. For me, I am a person of faith and that gives me a lot of meaning. Some people find a movement and live for it. Some here hope and live for, living forever through technology. It is a faith experience because at the present time, as you say, death is not avoidable.
What is death? The lights go out forever the minute your brain stops working? My own father died in the hospital and I was there. I could see the doctors working on him through a crack in the door that went into the ICU. They worked on him several hours when all of a sudden the monitors set off alarms and I could see they all went flatline. A few minutes later the main doctor came out and told me my Father was dead and he had just filled out the papers giving the exact time Dad died. We went into a side room and the doctors told a crying family all they went through the previous about six hours, while they fought for his life.
The head nurse then told us her story and the Hospital Chaplain came in and prayed with us. The Doctor then sent the head nurse back in to prepare Dads body. We were told we could spend some time with the body. The nurse left. All together about 30 minutes had past.
In a few minutes the nurse came running in saying, “We have a pulse!” The Doctor almost fell on the floor. They all ran back in and worked on Dad for another hour. The Doctor then came out and told me my dad’s heart was beating but he gave it a 99% chance that he would not live until the morning. He also said if my dad ever came to consciousness he would have severe brain damage because his heart beats were at 20 a minute and he had no heart beats for at least 30 minutes.
I went into my Dad’s room and as I held his hand I said, “Dad.” His eyes opened and were as clear as a bell. I told him if he knew it was me, to squeeze my hand. He couldn’t talk because of the tubes in his mouth and nose. I spent the next few minutes telling him how much I loved hem and how thankful I was he was my father.
I wish I had the time to tell you about the next few weeks. He never lost consciousness, even though everything was flatline. He had a near death experience of meeting Christ in the form of a figure of light. We talked a great deal about our nature, being spirit and body. What died? Not his spirit and consciousness. I suggest you might spend some time reading a few books on Death and Dying. This is a first hand account.
You have both a spirit and body. Your body is of the nature of this world and your spirit is of a different nature. Both exist together when you are alive but neither ever ceases to exist, though the body dies. For something intellectual, I recommend: “Beyond Death: Exploring the Evidence for Immortality.”
http://www.amazon.co...i...318&sr=1-17It begins with some foundational work on what exactly it means for something to be rational. Works through some traditional arguments for immortality and assesses them. Also covers the claims of Jesus and, significantly, it responds to the claims of atheist Michael Martin. Also discusses Near Death Experiences, heaven, and hell.
Bless you.