well firstly this is not because of marijuana, im not that psychosomatic.
as for what situations... all of them. I hardly feel insecure because i have healthy self esteem and know how to react to most social situations.
But i can find humor in a trash can, and that gets me going, then i start to laugh at how im laughing at a trash can, and i dont know i just feel really happy for the next few moments. It's nervewracking when someone is scolding me or if i am at a funeral because I have to be much more vigilante. If im in a situation where i absolutely must not smile i usually stare at the empty space 6 feet in front of me, so i dont pay attention to a very stout and pouty looking potted plant. Does not work all the time, but helps reduce the frequency.
I once kept smiling and couldnt stop when my parents were scolding me, and things like that feel like helplessly mad experiences. I dont know, just something about the way their eyebrows danced up and down really got to me.
theres been times where I cried out of terror (like a really scary movie when i was little, or thinking something really scary as an adult) yet smiled all the way through. Just typing this, i have laughed and smiled, and i cannot remember the reasons why, but im smiling right now.
The reason i thought this was related to tourettes was the release of dopamines i felt, and how i cant control my face. Honestly, i think its the greatest thing ever sometimes; to be able to find a reason to smile at everything.
When it happens it happens one of three ways
1) a crack of a smile
2) a very wolfish smile, this is when i cannot control my abs (makes me hunch over) or my cheek muscles and my mouth just HAS to contort itself wide like the joker (to avoid this, because its very creepy, i have to tack my jaw or stretch it every now and then to loosen it)
3) outright laughing out, no way to stop it, so i have to run into a bathroom stall and squeeze out all that laughing
i dont like being "that guy" who diagnoses himself but i looked at the angelman syndrome and I can contrive some similarities. I do drool sometimes when im not paying attention. I do not have seizures, but sometimes i simply must twitch my body into a kind of dance (it feels like someone is pouring electricity down my spine). I have very expressive hands. My attention span may be short, or maybe im just a bad student. All four of my wisdom teeth came in properly. The way i move is somewhat mechanical, i notice i pivot and ride my center of gravity around lot, my arm movements are kind of spidery (my elbow is usually raised higher than my wrist. I like to raise my elbow the appropriate altitude before i move my forearm). I didnt speak for the first two years of my life, and when finally i did, i only said one word over and over like a pokemon. People tell me they notice i smile/laugh more than anyone they've met.
some of my quirks include head shaking, imaginary keyboard typing (i dont imagine there is a keyboard when i do it, it just seems that way), sometimes doing full 360 degree turns on sidewalks, only to do another 180 pivot a few steps later.
however there are times i become rock bottom depressed, as if im all "laughed-out" and its like being in a different world.
Edited by escojung, 26 January 2011 - 07:21 AM.
