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              Advocacy & Research for Unlimited Lifespans


How did you find your core purpose?


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#1 Raptor87

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 01:42 PM

I remember when I was a kid, a friend of mine was highly interested in math. Eventually I started competing with him and through him I learned math (although I suck at math today). After that met another friend who liked to sketch and he was very creative! I eventually learned to be creative, but again it was in relation to someone else. This has been a pattern of mine throughout my life if it was about working out, dating, videogames or anything.

As I recognise! Iv'e always followed the footsteps of others. I am old today and feel somewhat empty. I haven't chosen a career and I am about to start college. But before I do, I want to find something of my own, a creative passion sorta´ speak. A core interest!

Some people seem to be just born in to things while others just dwell. If I could find something and turn it in to something productive, perhaps I wouldnt feel so drained. I know that some highly passionate people find their energy from doing what they love to do the most. I just eat, sleep and shit which is very depressing as I look back, I haven't done anything with my life!

Iv'e heard that we all have a gift but we need to find it. I don't know if it is possible to find "love and passion" at old age, I mean if you haven't found it already at younger age.

What do you think?
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#2 JonWCornell

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Posted 06 April 2013 - 02:23 AM

Well, you're about to start college. In college, you're going to be exposed to a million things that excite you. My life experience is that "finding your passion" is actually a matter of consciously deciding *not* to do the other 999,999 things that you're passionate about ;)

It still happens to me all the time - "Hey, I should take a week and dust off my old programming skills and write some code that - NO! Stop! Do something for life extension!!"
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#3 sthira

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Posted 06 April 2013 - 04:29 AM

Since this is a site devoted to expanding human longevity and healthspan, is there something within this arena which might give you Csikszentmihalyi's sense of flow?

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#4 Raptor87

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Posted 07 April 2013 - 07:28 PM

Since this is a site devoted to expanding human longevity and healthspan, is there something within this arena which might give you Csikszentmihalyi's sense of flow?

Don't think so! Iv'e never sensed something like flow while working which is weird because most us have.

I dont think I am interested to be immortal:D But I think that looking, staying and feeling young is important for our wellbeing. I am all about improving mankind but to be honest, with today's tech, its not really going to happen.

The only option we have is try to improve the quality of our lives which I am trying to do with this thread, I mean ask for guidance.
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#5 Vitalis

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Posted 08 April 2013 - 02:19 PM

Your situation reminds me very much of my own. I become passionate about something, than a month later I'm completely bored with it. I wonder if oxytocin levels effect how long one can be passionate about a certain field?
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#6 redFishBlueFish

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Posted 22 July 2014 - 03:12 AM

I am middle aged and in the same mindset or situation as you brainfogged. Personally I think I should have perused automotive repair 10 years ago instead going to college. I enjoyed working on my own car and cars seem very basic, much easier to deal with than a computer program or a huge physics problem. Also manual labor things like welding, automotive repair(even with computers), seemed very simple. If the car wasn't moving only a, b, c would cause this.  The thing with back then was I didn't want to go into debt. All the educational pursuits required some form of debt based on my wage and back then I didn't want to work extra two achieve an education in automotive. Why? to be frank, I was stuck in a box for 15 years before this. I was raised up by groundings and forced babysitting during the summer, I just wanted to have fun.


I believe everyone wants to look smart or feel wanted. I use to deny this, but as I aged I saw this to be true. As you did, I would peruse the same interests as my friends. I don't really know what to tell you, maybe find something that you can stand to do for 8 hours. Find the most elementary part of the subject. I could play video games for 8+ hours, but also could most people that play video games. This isn't a job though,  parts that make up the game is a job. Could you draw for 8 hours and does it look good? What about programming? Could you sit at a command prompt typing code for hours? I could, but I suck at it. lol.


This section of the forums is so dead :S

Edited by redFishBlueFish, 22 July 2014 - 03:13 AM.

#7 Russ Maughan

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Posted 24 March 2015 - 05:27 PM

If you focus too much on one area of expertise you limit your creativity if your goal is to create something new. If all you want is a living that is fine. If you really want to apply some old fashion enginuity and have many of those lucky accidents that lead to breakthroughs then diversify your feild of study. I call myself a scientist in the company of scientists or when pressed. To everyone else I am a jack of all trades. (macgyver). Stock up on dictionaries. Don't be afraid to question professors. Every textbook I've every writen has long since been updated. Again and again. By guys like you.



noun: polymath; plural noun: polymaths
  1. a person of wide-ranging knowledge or learning.


#8 samiamm

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Posted 25 March 2015 - 01:38 AM





So, I’ve thought about how to go about describing this.  Now, please don’t think for a minute that I don’t believe I have a great deal to learn from any one of you.  I am open to adjusting or completely changing my opinions on this.  Nor do I imagine that this is anything particularly new to you.  Anyway, here’s what I think:  
As a child, I was inordinately apprehensive about social situations.  Particularly dinner parties where there was no escaping the immediate presence of adults - some of whom I did not know, all of whom I was intimidated by.  (By the way, one interesting change I’ve noticed over the years is that when I was ten, I was espected to try to fit into the adult world; and I desperately wanted to; now, I watch my ten year old nieces and nephews, and it’s the exact opposite:  the parents are trying to fit themselves into their worlds.  Pathetic.)
So, a favorite uncle of mine once took me aside; and he said, “forget about yourself.”  I had no idea what he was talking about and told him so.  He said, “forget about yourself.  The reason why you’re nervous and miserable at the dinner table is because you’re focusing on yourself.”  Then came my almost unbelievable (to me now) reply:  “what else should I focus on?”  LOL.  He laughed, and said:  “focus on the people around you and trying to make them feel comfortable; on trying to make them feel intelligent and interesting.”  I still wasn’t sure even what he meant.  He went on to say more or less: “if you forget yourself by focusing on them, your nervousness will disappear and your misery will evaporate.  You’ll feel more confident and happy.” 
So, I’ll never forget when I first put this into practice; it was like a Copernican Revolution - I was at the periphery and other people were now at the center of my attention; it was like black magic - it really worked.  I suddenly felt much happier, even joyous, and confident.  I have never forgotten this lesson - one of the most important things I’ve ever learned - and to this day I absolutely love meeting new people, and can talk endlessly and freely from Presidents to janitors, and everyone in between.  
Once you see this, the truth of this principle becomes blindingly obvious.  Moreover, this same principle applies everywhere.   
The problem, however, is this:  “society” (a reified word if there ever was one, but I must use it here, lol) is continually shouting in a deafening chorus for you to do the exact opposite; self help books are the worst in this.  If you are in any problem, whatever it is, the answer is always to focus on yourself:  start a journal, do some “self-exploratory” (re: “masturbatory”) art; discover yourself through some “journey of the self” narrative, go on a “road trip” to be with and find yourself, etc.   You probably know the drill.  Or consider the nature of most therapy:  most therapy is about focusing on yourself; and usually you get nowhere at best.    
But here’s the rub:  the secret to cultivating unhappiness & poor confidence is to ask yourself: “who am I?” “What should I do with my life?” Or to “try to enjoy yourself.”  And to do so continuously if you want to be really miserable.  In other words, “society” is continually attempting to tutor you into misery.  
So, in short, paradoxically (and most truths are paradoxical), if you are going to find yourself you must forget yourself.  Even if you are going to enjoy yourself, you must forget yourself:  
“Do not enjoy yourself. Enjoy dances and theaters and joy-rides and champagne and oysters; enjoy jazz and cocktails and night-clubs if you can enjoy nothing better; enjoy bigamy and burglary and any crime in the calendar, in preference to the other alternative; but never learn to enjoy yourself.” ~G.K. Chesterton   
Okay, so what then?   
The secret to happiness & confidence is to forget yourself by absorbing yourself in the world.  To me this means the pursuit of truth, beauty, and goodness (Aristotle's "trinity".)  Each person can apprehend an aspect of reality that is uniquely disclosable to them; and this aspect is endless and profound, and endlessly and profoundly fascinating.  And the more you are absorbed in this pursuit, the more you forget yourself, the happier you are - and, ironically, the more in touch you are with whom you really are. 
The truth is, you already know what you are drawn towards and what to do; those questions swirling around your mind regarding “who am I?” are there to confuse and bewilder you into paralysis.  We are chronically habituated to revert right back into the rut of self absorption; it’s far easier to slide back into the morass of "self" - even if it makes you miserable - than it is to focus on the world and people around you and planting thriving gardens wherever you go.  
The other way people make themselves absolutely miserable is by confusing ends and means.
Anway, enough....LOL. 


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#9 Russ Maughan

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Posted 25 March 2015 - 03:42 AM

Sounds like your uncle was a man like Socrates. Able to leap tall epiphanies.


#10 Antonio2014

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Posted 25 March 2015 - 07:40 AM

Why should you have a core purpose? Or a only one core purpose? I have worked as math teacher at university, as a programmer, as a Japanese translator, as a agriculture researcher, ... Now my main purpose is creating an IT company.


Be like water, man.

#11 samiamm

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Posted 25 March 2015 - 10:27 AM

Sounds like your uncle was a man like Socrates. Able to leap tall epiphanies.



that was excruciating to watch;

Edited by samiamm, 25 March 2015 - 11:06 AM.

#12 Russ Maughan

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Posted 25 March 2015 - 02:30 PM

lol. wax on, wax off.

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