44 replies to this topic

[Babychris]

I've don't read everything, but I'm not sure you are suffering from an OCD. It's more like a minor depressive anxious (sort of ADD) issue coupled with some kind of lack of maturity.

You must be brave, and try to achieve most of the stuff you begin. For exemple when you begin to study something, go on your computer and every question that come on your mind should be search on internet (google is an easy way). Day after day you will understand more and more and that will ease your further research and give you confidence.
you might try some supplements too but something mild man! Never listen people that advice modafinil or crap like this!

[Max Headroom Incident]

Dunbar's anxious "what if" circular thinking strikes me as VERY textbook OCD. I have episodes of this myself and it's awful. Totally paralyzing, and nothing anyone says is satisfactory to stop it. I know I'm driving friends/family crazy, yet I can't stop asking the same lame questions and arguing w/ the answers.

I think the best thing would be to see a professional rather than spilling your guts to an online forum. If your mind is whirling in circles this way constantly, you require more help than can be given here. If it's just a temporary reaction to life stress there might be more of a role for supplements or nootropics. I believe that you do want to get better and take the advice given to you, but that may not be possible until you get your anxiety and circular thinking under control. Doing so may require intense counseling, medication and lifestyle changes.

(This is not meant to frighten you but to spur you to action. OCD is not a threat to your life, but it can wreck your quality of life, productivity and relationships worse than almost anything. It is a disease of over-thinking that makes it difficult to act, but nothing is going to change if you don't act).

[Colli]

Nope. Not normal. It's reeeeally obvious.

You mean ocd is my main issue? But citalopram didn't work. I could try another ssri
but the other ssris like sertraline or paroxetine have much more side effects and seem
more dangerous than citalopram.

Actually, I would say that sertraline is much less "dangerous" (as you put it) than citalopram. Off the top of my head, I'm fairly certain that it is nowhere near as anticholinergic and so has less impact on cognition.

I have been diagnosed with social anxiety and generalised anxiety, and whereas I've never had a diagnoses of OCD, I am prone to obsessive thought patterns. Sertraline has been very helpful in reducing the frequency of these thought loops, and CBT has also helped me to take a step back from my own chaotic thinking and look at things more rationally.

Some have suggested that you are resisting help, and I agree with this to a certain extent. I don't think that this is necessarily an attention seeking issue - I believe that you are over-thinking to the point where, if you don't actually articulate what you're thinking, you are in danger of becoming overwhelmed by anxiety. You are coming across as someone who is desperate for structure in their life.

This isn't going to be easy, and it is going to take some work, but you need professional help. Medication can also be a highly effective adjunct and is not dangerous or poisonous. You need to put your preconceived notions aside and listen to practitioners who can help you. Please don't shut the door on what I and others are saying - it will save you.

[dunbar]

Hi,
I absolutely have ocd. I have no doubt about that, even though I could probably also start to doubt having ocd if I thought long enough about it but I know my symptoms and they clearly are ocd.

I only go by the leaflets and my sertraline leaflet was so much longer than the citalopram leaflet. It had way more side effects which affects more or less the entire body. It was so damn scary that I thought there is no way I can possibly take this without then being afraid of side effects all day long. I really would have liked to take it! But the side effects were simply too many. I would have lived in fear all the time checking my body for symptoms of side effects. I don't see how a person with anxiety can take such a drug and not become more anxious.

I want to get better, but I just feel like I can't do it or apply advice which I get. I then stand there and either think this won't work or that I cannot do this on my own or I think that I have no real idea how to do this. Usually it's one of these thoughts which then keep me from doing it.

It's like I have to get to the root of everything and discuss every possible problem and scenario and unless all my fears can be resolved and all my concerns can be disarmed then I cannot do it and it was all useless. I have experienced it many times that people simply gave up on me and accused me of not wanting to get better when I was simply struggling with questions and unclarities which kept me from following their advice.

I have also tried therapy a few times and it was disappointing.
Back then I was also given advice like Man you need professional help.
Back then I really thought everything can be fine when I go and get therapy and
then I ended up very disappointed cause it sucked. I wouldn't even know what to say to a therapist.
I can't just go to one, without even knowing if he's good and if he even cares, and then spill my beans.
For me it would be important to feel like a therapist really cares otherwise I also couldnt trust him and accept advice from him
when I feel like he doesnt give a damn about me or that I annoy him or that I am only a customer and not more.
I really dont know if there are any good therapists or how to find them I cant simply go by the yellow pages.
And I'm also scared of being offended. One therapist offended me so much that I suffered from it for weeks and felt miserable.

[TheBatman]

Hi,
I absolutely have ocd. I have no doubt about that, even though I could probably also start to doubt having ocd if I thought long enough about it

Over thinking is a major symptom of ocd though

[Babychris]

So I have OCD too.. DAMN

[username]

dunbar, you have to break the vicious cycle somehow. If you don't take risks, things will never change. A strategy is to try to rationalize your action (e.g. taking medication, trying supplements):

Good
-> could help me
-> might improve overthinking, better relationships
-> finally doing something to fight this

Bad
-> possible side effects
-> taking the med can lead to hypochondria
etc.

This is just an example. Make a table with the advantages and disadvantages of your choice. Right down everything that comes to mind (on both sides). After doing that, you choose a percentage for advantages/disadvantages (e.g. 60%/40%). It does not matter how many arguments you have on each side. Instead, you go with your feeling of what is better. Does it seem like taking the medicatoin / supplement / therapy whatever has more advantages than disadvantages or the other way around?
This is a helpful therapeutic strategy that helps with making decisions.

Hypochondria is annoying. A year ago, I was CONVINCED that I have lymphoma and that I would probably need chemo or even die. Just remember: It's pathological thinking, man. Don't beat yourself up over it. It's not your fault.

You have to have luck with your therapists. I have to say that I'm very lucky because my therapist is very empathetic and understanding. It's kind of a gamble, unfortunately. If you don't think, you profit from it, look on amazon for a book on OCD. Books can be therapeutic as well.
How about this one? www.amazon.com/The-OCD-Workbook-Breaking-Obsessive-Compulsive/dp/1572249218 (I picked the first one I found)
Just order it and give it a try

[dunbar]

Hello,
I have a few books about ocd but they rather describe ocd without really helping very much.
I also know a therapists who understands ocd. I have been in contact with him via email for a few years and we've also spoken
on the phone a few times. Talking to him made me feel better but he also couldn't really tell me anything which would have helped
with the ocd. I also wouldnt really know to tell someone who has ocd. I mean fears for example arent always rational. You can know
that a fear isn't rational and you're still scared. So what do you do then? I dont really think that issues like depression or anxiety
can simply be solved through rational thinking and reasoning with yourself and telling you things like "Hey, it's not really as bad as
you think it is" or "Hey, it's not really as scary as you think it is". I dont think this works.
Someone also gave me the advice to deal with depressive and anxious thoughts this way by writing them down and then thinking
about my fears and trying to put them in the proper perspective. But I dont know how to do this. How is this supposed to work when
you simply think that all your fears and depressive thoughts are reasonable and not just crazy thoughts? If I could convince myself
that everything isn't as bad as I think it is then I'd not be depressed anymore but I can't do this cause I think that my perception isnt
twisted. I think my perception is normal and that my worries are reasonable.

[TheBatman]

Someone also gave me the advice to deal with depressive and anxious thoughts this way by writing them down and then thinking
about my fears and trying to put them in the proper perspective. But I dont know how to do this. How is this supposed to work when
you simply think that all your fears and depressive thoughts are reasonable and not just crazy thoughts? If I could convince myself
that everything isn't as bad as I think it is then I'd not be depressed anymore but I can't do this cause I think that my perception isnt
twisted. I think my perception is normal and that my worries are reasonable.

That was me. I didn't mean to put them into the "right" perspective, because I don't know if your fears are twisted or not. I meant it as a way that could help you prioritize your thoughts. You have fears and problems that need to be solved, but there's only one of you. You can't take on all of your fears and problems at once.

For example I have various things to get done throughout the day in order to meet certain deadlines. If my mind is hung up on something(like why the sky is blue, how the universe works, why a certain girl never called me back, how atoms work ect.) to the point where I become distracted, it can be a problem. It allows more stress to pile up on top of things I'm already concerned about and effects daily stuff, like my performance at work. However if you write some of your concerns down, it can help you see which ones need attention and which ones shouldn't be a big concern right now. Obviously your fear of leaving the house is more of a problem for you than not being able to comprehend Dr. House - therefore you should prioritize fixing that problem first. By writing down your fears and problems you can ask yourself, "Can I do anything about this right now?" which helps you weed out the things that deserve your attention, and things that you'll be able to work on later.

OCD is a sign of situational depression. Writing down and prioritizing your thoughts will help you make critical changes that help you claw your way out of depression more effectively.

[dunbar]

Hi,
there are a few issues with that.

1) I cannot really solve a lot of my issues which depress me for example not being able to leave the house without becoming depressed because of my eye issues. I cannot fix this. I wish I could.

2) The stuff sounds reasonable but what if it still doesn't work? For example I know that in order to function I needed to blank out pretty much all of my problems. Once I start going online and then reading about diseases it's basically over cause then I become upset and depressed and then I can't really concentrate anymore. I am aware of this but this doesn't mean that now where I am aware of it I can simply avoid all mistakes. I do the same mistakes almost every day. I feel like I have no control over myself. And then also such a list won't help very much if I cannot put it into practice. I really wish I had a drill seargant who tells me what to do and what not do or someone who picks me up when I am depressed but I have no such person.
Also stuff like "I'll think about this problem later" doesn't really work for me. I mean sometimes I start thinking about worries and then I cannot simply think to myself I will think about this some other time and then not think about it anymore. This all sounds good on paper but it doesn't really work that well in reality.
For example worrying about something doesn't really help much it's not productive. I know that. Does this mean I dont worry anymore? No.
I also cant get over things. I have been depressed over certain things like how I look for years and I still become depressed when I look at myself. It's not like I can get over something or accept something.

[TheBatman]

You use the word can't a lot. How about instead of saying "I can't solve my issues" you say "How CAN I solve my issues?"

Do you have any friends or family you can call when you're feeling low?

[dunbar]

No, I can't talk about this with my family. They have enough own issues.

You know what just happened? I was watching some TV, already feeling depressed for various reasons.
Then I turned on the light and noticed that my visual disorder was suddenly very strong. I was seeing sparks and moving things
in my vision field.
Then I checked on my leg cause I had been having pain on my leg the past few days. The fat tissue is very sensitive and hurts and
I don't know why. And then I discovered a few new lipomas on my leg deep in the fat tissue. This then led me to examine my upper body
for new lipomas and I also found new lipomas there.
Then I felt absolutely miserable and hopeless and scared. I simply can't deal with this. I have way too many issues for 1 person.
It simply is way too much. I go from 1 health issue to the other never getting any rest. When I don't worry about lipomas then it's
something else. I simply don't understand how can 1 person have so many things wrong with her? This is the worst. If I only had 1 thing
I could accept it but why so many things? It's like a bad movie.

[username]

No, I can't talk about this with my family. They have enough own issues.

That's a view that many people with mental health issues have. When I got better, I was finally able to talk to my friends about it and I don't regret it.
This view of "I don't wanna bother anyone" does more harm than good.
Also, other people are a lot more resistant than you think.

[Babychris]

the number of problems you have is related to the state of your state of mind..

I think that are a case where SSRI might have more positive than negative..

[dunbar]

@ longschi

My parents have enough own issues which also drag me down. I know what I am talking about.
If I told them how bad I am doing they'd suffer even more and then I'd also feel worse.

@ chris

This is crap. You have no idea what kind of real diseases I have! So dont give me this offensive crap.
Crap like this makes me damn angry. This is exactly the shit which therapists drop on you. You have not
the slightest idea about how many things are wrong with me and you act as if it's all just in my mind.