Posted 23 April 2012 - 04:33 AM
OK not much feedback from here, so I went ahead anyway.
Day 1: I started sulbutiamine on the wrong day apparently. I had to wake up early, was up late the night before, and I had taken 7.5 mg of hydrocodone the evening before for a toothache. That was my last dose after four days of using hydrocodone and I'm not an addict to the stuff, but it definitely made me feel like I was "under water" or lethargic in my thinking the following day after taking such nasty stuff (the Lortab, that is). I took L-Carnitine liquid (which includes B vitamins) and ALCAR with a small dose, probably 200 mg of sulbutiamine just before a lunch date with a girl I know. I felt fearless, no anxiety, and despite my tiredness I didn't care about analyzing other people's reactions to my own actions. I even kissed the girl on the lips as she dropped me off, though we've never kissed before. But by the time I arrived to work and took more ALCAR I felt like I was going to faint...my feet were swimming with air and my hands and feet were clammy. The words kept pouring out of my mouth with cohesive conversation but I kept my distance from people until I "came down" a bit and got some better focus. I was completely wiped out by the end of the night.
Day 2: I took a low dose of pramiracetam, 150 mg or so. I felt a better focus and clarity, with colors becoming more intense and I found myself Googling the drug much more, and reading detailed reports. Motivation did not increase. I took some ALCAR and drove to work and the music was rather intense. I had also taken a bit of L-tyrosine (just a dab on the tongue) and it resulted in sporadic laughing fits on the car ride there, but within an hour or two I started to crash...hard. I just felt completely drained and tired, and no amount of L-carnitine liquid or ALCAR could wake me back up. I had a few beers after I got home and took more L-carnitine liquid and felt wonderful again, completely focused. And motivated. I've found L-carnitine liquid is great after a beer or two for motivation and clarity. Never fails.
Day 3 (today): I woke up, took 200 mg of sulb and 100 mg or so more, with a bit of ALCAR. After taking ALCAR I felt a bit speedy and uncertain. Went to Walmart for an oil change and things were more pronounced, lucid, yet I lacked the total confidence I felt the day before on the ride to work. Once I returned home I took no other supplements and thoroughly cleaned my entire house, then felt a great sense of exaltation as I finished and settled into the evening with a movie, taking an occasional smoke on the lanai and looking up at the stars under a cool, crisp evening here in Florida. Everything was beautiful, I had total confidence (+8 hrs after sulb) and a smile crept across my face multiple times. I even played my piano even though I haven't touched it in years and I had no qualms talking to women through text and on dating sites... Keep in mind I had a beer then took some L-carnitine liquid as usual and it was a blast of fresh air...but more so than usual. I think the underlying good feeling comes from the sulb. And now I suddenly feel the motivation and drive to contribute to this log. This was truly a wonderful day, though I couldn't really pinpoint any specific feelings. Except for just after taking the sulb in the morning, I felt a little high, focused...but without the intoxication or speediness.
A little about me... I have looked all my life for substances to increase motivation and decrease social anxiety. On the outside I am quite normal, but I thrive for social interaction and want to talk to women and be an Alpha male, which I am not. I first started with GHB, and that made me walk up and talk to complete strangers with no fear ... and to this day it was the ONLY true mood enhancer. No matter the situation, when I took it I became completely happy. Not even alcohol or marijuana can do that for me. I since looked for things that affected GABA or GHB receptors, so phenibut was the next thing I experimented with, but it was no where close to GHB's effects, and tolerance built up quickly. I soon had to give up.
Flash forward to about 10 years later. Tried Oxytocin but it was more of a placebo effect and while the love hormone is interesting, it wasn't what I was expecting as far as motivation and being outgoing is concerned. Then I tried L-tyrosine...WOW. I felt very talkative and happy...and for a week I felt on top of the world. No fear, just wanted to live life to the fullest. Obviously from the effect on dopamine. Then tolerance built up and I started on ALCAR... again, WOW. Tolerance built up to the powder form and I took the liquid L-carnitine, and as long as I take it in the right situations both carnitines have helped tremendously with being more outgoing and talkative. No fear, no hesitation in talking to strangers, but they lack the motivation of GHB and the consistent feeling of being high on life and that anything is possible. If anything I have to dose constantly and the effects only last a short while.
Now this takes me to sulb. I heard addiction is bad and tolerance is a bitch. But today I felt good. Not that high... just calm, focused, and content. I don't know how much is to contribute to sulb or just a good, relaxing day off. I'm already pretty level-headed and happy most of the time, but after tasting total freedom with GHB ten yeas ago I will always search for the true mood elevator and socializing molecule that I came to know and love. It seems anything that is that great is a double-edged sword and has its own consequences. For GHB it was taking just a few sips too much and passing out, but if timed appropriately I could induce astral projection.
Some people say prami helps with psychic notions, and being a former ghost hunter I find that interesting, but I also find sulb much more interesting than the racetams right now. I want to live in the now, not the past. I'm more interested in life than death.. And I heard racetams bring up past memories all too easily.
Can anyone recommend something that would suit my needs better? I will continue to update you. As I stated above, L-carnitine (with b vitamins) and ALCAR seem to be the best motivators for social interaction I've found (especially combined with alcohol...along with l-tyrosine, as long as tolerance doesn't develop), and I remain sharp and witty while on them. I guess I will continuing searching. But I must say I haven't felt this awake since ten years ago.