As a result of excessive psychedelic use over the past few years (DXM, LSD, 25I-NBOMe), I was left with some unsurprising symptomatic consequences. Occasional auditory hallucinations in the form of voices have just started in the past two months (generally only occur if I am paying specific attention to them in a silent environment), simultaneous dysthymia and euthymia (normally I am one extreme or the other, not both at once), short-term memory issues (instantly forget names/faces unless through repetition, which gets embarrassing), mild confusion (details or circumstances seem not to make sense when they easily do to others), social anxiety (this is not the normal me, usually I am extroverted but recently have been introverted/isolating--although not depressed), frequent (but not constant) "clouded" feel (despite no obvious impairment in intellectual functioning), reduction in energy, and flashbacks are increasing in intensity/frequency. These aren't causing significant impairments in life functioning in general, but they are bothersome and I want to alleviate any and all that I can, without risking psychosis, depression or any other relapse of psychiatric symptom.
I haven't done DXM in over a year, but it did produce a long-lasting psychotomimesis that seemed to be greatly reduced by nootropics during this current year. In the past year, I wanted to push the boundaries of my mind/perception by taking supratherapeutic doses of LSD and 25I-NBOMe, but eventually it just led to an addictive pattern where I ceased to receive any of the actual rewards/insights/enlightenment from psychedelics, generated depression/psychosis and decided to stop them for quite some time (so far it has been three months, but I plan on extending this at least a couple of years). I've also discontinued cannabis a month ago (fairly frequent user, would go in monthly phases of daily use and in other monthly phases of none at all) after causing a variety of negative effects, worse than psychedelics, imo (overwhelming social anxiety, amotivation, cognitive clouding, depression, isolation, ...)
I've been diagnosed bipolar I, but now they're suspecting schizophrenia because it matches age/gender of onset and symptomatic presentation. I self-assessed the PANSS (I have a high awareness) and scored pretty much right in the middle, so it makes sense why this would be a theory. I've discontinued all psychiatric medication (mood stabilizers, antipsychotics, non-bzd-anxiolytics) for over five months for many reasons and have only positive things to say. I have a greater satisfaction of life, improved focus (compared to those times), more relative energy and of course none of the unnecessary side effects. Anyone who interacts with me regularly has said that I seem to be functioning much better than when I was on them, and as a result of these last five months, and general discontent with the psychiatric industry, I've vowed never to take them again (unless in a definite emergency situation). It seems that all of these conditions (and in most cases of other people, too) are just temporary and will fade with time, and that medications either prolong this period or make things worse.
In the past nine or so months of trying a few nootropics, I found phenylpiracetam greatly improved many of my cognitive clouding and (for a while) anxiety and depression. I'm convinced it helped repair a lot of the NMDA damage from DXM a lot more quickly (I've also read that bipolar is really rooted in NMDA/glutamate, as opposed to surface-level SE and DA, correct me if I am wrong), and those post-dissociative psychotomimesis/cloudings have all disappeared. Tolerance was noted, but not as bad as in other anecdotes I had been reading everywhere. Other racetams were ineffective (oxiracetam, aniracetam, piracetam), Noopept wasn't very noticeable (even sublingual in excess doses), and Adrafinil was highly uncomfortable (2-3 administrations consistently resulted in a highly negative and depressed state). I became convinced that phenylpiracetam would be more effective in higher and/or less doses, but this is obviously irrational and it seems that the higher doses caused depression, anxiety and even sedation, somewhat predictably. Possible aggravation of psychosis.
My theories are that a majority of the symptoms are as a result of the excessive psychedelics (5-HT2A activation, too much serotonin), residual cannabinoid metabolites/brain changes, possible exacerbation/progression of latent mental illness, possible residual receptor changes from multiple years of psychiatric medications, improper past use of nootropics and brain balancing out of neurotransmitters as a result of abstinence from all substances (other than caffeine, nicotine, B12, C, D3, and zinc).
I want to know what would be the best ways to get rid of these troublesome symptoms (although mild) while still reaping the benefits of nootropics (consistent euthymia, energetic, clarity, creativity, motivation, ...) and continuing to not take any psychiatric medication. Perhaps I wasn't using the right ones, taking improper vitamins, or lacking nutrients that I do need? What are good "low impact" ways to restore SE, DA, NE, Glu, ACh, ... levels? Would it be best to use no nootropics at all for quite some time? How important is microbiome in bipolar/schizophrenia? Is it better for BDNF to be higher or lower in cases such as these? I've been slowly re-integrating exercise into my routine and will soon be walking 10 miles or more a day at a new job, so this isn't too much of a concern, but it will be helpful. I wanted to ask those with knowledge and experience in the matter, any constructive advice is appreciated.
Edit: TL;DR: how do I restore NTs/brain function from past substance use and psychiatric medication without causing psychosis or other issues?
Edited by tyrosine25I, 10 September 2016 - 10:07 AM.