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Joining the military, am I making the right life choice?

lifestyle military personality

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#1 Caelorum

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Posted 30 July 2015 - 05:11 AM


So, i don't know if what i'm about to do is the right thing to do. I also don't know if this is the right place to post this, so I apologize in advance. 

 

I'm 22, healthy, intelligent(i'd like to think), i have a great mother and younger brother, and I have a relatively stable living situation. I'm also depressed, incredibly indecisive to the point where i think i'm bipolar, pessimistic, optimistic, cynical, have low self-esteem, low self-worth, and immense dreams i don't think i'll ever be able to make reality. 

 

My early life wasn't exactly stable, i had an abusive step-father (for which i honestly don't blame any issues on, i never dwelled on it), moved constantly, was homeless multiple times with my mother and step-father, but i was still a generally good kid who got very good grades and made friends easily. A few years ago my mother and I settled in the lower-middle class suburbs, and i've been here for quite a while, settling in this little town. I dropped out of school at 15 because i hated it, got my G.E.D., then went to a community college and got an associates in computer science. Honestly a huge waste of time in my opinion. 

 

The last 4 years have basically been me trying to figure out what the hell i want to do with my life. I have a lot of dreams. Immortality, space exploration, becoming a tech-billionaire, owning a successful game company, learning everything there is to know about the universe and discovering every little bit of knowledge. But i've never been able to figure out how to start those dreams. I come up with MULTIPLE ideas, but never follow through with them because I don't trust them enough to actually work. I'll get started on them, but then over analyze to the point where i assume they, and I, will fail.

 

I'm a dreamer. But that's all I am. There is no place in this world for me, that i'd actually want to be. I want to be in the shoes of giants like Elon Musk, or Bill Gates, or Marek Rosa. But I don't have the drive, or dedication, or belief that i'll be able to succeed like them. It's put me in a hopeless spiral I can't seem to get out of.

 

So I've finally sat down and decided I should join the military, hoping, praying to a god I don't believe in that it will somehow change me. That I'll come out after 4 years as an active duty U.S. Army Ranger and i'll be a strong, confident man who actually DOES something with all of the dreams in his head. But there is also a side of me that says "what if i'm not". What if i waste 8 years of my life (4 active, 4 inactive), and i'm still the same person. 

 

I can't do a job. I have work ethic, but i hate working for someone. I would honestly rather die. And I have such a f***ed up view on time and accomplishment, that even if I get out, and go towards something like a degree in physics and astronomy, i'll think i'm too old, and those silly degrees won't get me where i want.

 

I'm about to put myself in a position that goes against everything I stand for. Blindly listening to authority, doing the same pointless tasks every day, wasting time.

 

I don't know anymore. This is the one thing I feel like I CAN do. I'm physically able, I've studied all of the asvab books, and I can pretend to be anything I need to pretend to be to get through the military. But I don't know if this will get me where i want to be, It will get me out of my comfort zone, it will force me to do things i wouldnt normally do, it'll help me gain some sort of self worth. But honestly, will that be enough?

 

I honestly don't even know why i'm posting here. I can already predict most of the answers I'll get. I guess i'm just hoping for one answer that takes a view I haven't taken yet.



#2 mikeinnaples

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Posted 30 July 2015 - 04:28 PM

You sound like me when I was close to your age (19) for me.

 

I absolutely have the USN and USMC to thank for making me into the person I am today. I joined the Navy as a hospital corpsman and went to Field Medical Service School to be a 8404 FMF Corpsman. In short, I joined the Navy to be a USMC medic, which I did for 5 years active duty as a line corpsman (ie not in an aid station, but a grunt with extra gear, heh). I traveled the world, made the best friends of my life, and most importantly ...gave myself time to figure out what I wanted in life and ended my service with the drive and motivation to make it happen. It made me grow up and gave me unwavering self confidence because there isn't shit that life can throw at me now that I am unable to handle.

 

Not sure why you want to be a Ranger tbh, because it doesn't seem to be a good fit for you. However, it will change your life if you don't wash out. Good luck.

 



#3 Caelorum

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Posted 30 July 2015 - 04:41 PM

You sound like me when I was close to your age (19) for me.

I absolutely have the USN and USMC to thank for making me into the person I am today. I joined the Navy as a hospital corpsman and went to Field Medical Service School to be a 8404 FMF Corpsman. In short, I joined the Navy to be a USMC medic, which I did for 5 years active duty as a line corpsman (ie not in an aid station, but a grunt with extra gear, heh). I traveled the world, made the best friends of my life, and most importantly ...gave myself time to figure out what I wanted in life and ended my service with the drive and motivation to make it happen. It made me grow up and gave me unwavering self confidence because there isn't shit that life can throw at me now that I am unable to handle.

Not sure why you want to be a Ranger tbh, because it doesn't seem to be a good fit for you. However, it will change your life if you don't wash out. Good luck.

Thank you for the reply. That's what im hoping the military will give me. An opportunity to get out of my shell and take on bigger tasks. Increasing my confidence as much as possible.

And I've read up a lot on the jobs Rangers do, as well as spoken to a couple of ex Rangers. I really admire them, and feel if i truly want to get as far as possible out of my comfort zone, a combat role would be the best bet. Rangers, in my opinion, have a very interesting combat role.

I don't know why. I fear failure with many things. Ideas, game designs, tech startups, business ventures, social experiences, dreams. But for some reason i don't fear it when i think of RASP. I feel like i truly have the ability to make it. And if i do, it'll show me that i really can do anything i set my mind to. So my other immense goals in life won't seem so impossible.

Edited by Caelorum, 30 July 2015 - 04:42 PM.


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#4 Dichotohmy

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Posted 30 July 2015 - 09:04 PM

I had a very similar mindset to you when I joined the Marine Corps at a little older age than you are now. I would recommend staying the hell away from any infantry field in today's military for a variety of reasons:

 

- The peace-time military is awful in every way. This is doubly so for infantry units because there's no deployment workups to do anymore, because there's no real deployments, and you don't have a regular "9-5" job to go to like the POG MOSs. You will spend 80% or more of your days standing by in or close to the barracks, with cleaning, wall-locker inspections, weapons cleaning, and other mind-numbing tasks your new reality. That is the reality if you wash out of ranger school and go to a regular army grunt unit.

 

- You will be fucked with, a lot, by the senior guys who have been in for some time and have gotten to deploy. This will not be good for your mental health. If you can demonstrate competence and reliability in executing tasks with minimal supervision, you'll have a much easier time, but the senior guys will always view you in a lesser light because you haven't deployed.

 

- Your sense of accomplishment from graduating basic, and then ranger school, will become a palatable cynicism once you realize your next three years aren't at all like you pictured them to be.

 

I gained a lot from the USMC, but I can guarantee I would be driven mad by ut if I didn't go to a deployment-cycling grunt unit. It also didn't magically change me from what I was before to some sort of uber-motivated self-actualizing functional person with a strong work ethic. On the other hand, my service did result in a lot of fear extinction which eliminated the anxiety symptoms I had beforehand, and taught other intangible life skills like common sense.

 

If joining today, I would banish the glorious notions of being a special forces super-hero, and go for a more humble military field that will give you some real-world experience for when you get out.

 

 


Edited by Dichotohmy, 30 July 2015 - 09:09 PM.


#5 Duchykins

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Posted 31 July 2015 - 07:26 PM

I was a medic in the active Army in my early 20s.  Fucking loved it.  But I am a person who thrives on structure.  I have always had a love affair with biological science so that was one reason I wanted to get out and go do my own thing.

 

My little brother also joined as a medic and now he is currently in special forces training after serving in the Middle East and being recommended for it.  Unlike me, he chose to go career.

 

It's good that you already have a degree, this can help you enlist with a higher rank.

 

You're not going to go in the Army and train as a Ranger right away.  There are some requirements and one of them includes having a minimum 2 year clean record of service.  So your ability to volunteer for Ranger training isn't decided on what MOS you chose when first entering the military.  Just like my brother and his new job.  You'll have plenty of time to feel out the military and decide.

 

You don't need to study for the ASVAB.  It's almost like a GED test, no big deal.  High school stuff, with a few tests on your spatial reasoning, crap like that.  I didn't do any prep for it (because I just didn't think to) but I smoked it in about 35 minutes with a score of 98, the average person finishes it in about 90 minutes I think.  I was a high school dropout (supposed to be class of 2000), been out of school for 5 years at that point, who had finished the diploma just to get into the Army (I only needed to complete civics since I bailed in the middle of my senior year lol), hadn't started college yet (which was after I got out).  

 

I'm just telling you this so you don't stress about the ASVAB.  You don't need to.  Since you already have a degree there's no way you could get less than an 80 on the ASVAB without any prep at all.  I just can't see it.  Honestly, from what I saw, you have to be pretty derpy to get less than an 80.  You will have a wide range of MOS to choose from when it's contract time.

 

I also don't get the impression the combat specialty MOS jobs are a good fit for you at this point.  You also don't seem to have healthy self-esteem judging from your comments about your own worth.  This might be a problem for you during basic and AIT training.  BUT it could swing you around the other way just as easily.

 

Basic training will involve a lot of breaking your psyche down, then building it back up and creating a sense of solidarity between you and your peers.  They will make you stronger and confident as long as you maintain some semblance of resilience during the whole process.  Drill sergeants will jack you up and be hardest in the beginning, and then gradually mellow out and become more personable as training progresses.  They will be hardest on anybody who is an officer candidate or squad leader or enlisted in a higher rank than private, up to PFC, even though they make a point of calling everyone "private" so nobody's head gets too big.  About halfway through they started calling me "doc" and "soldier medic"... they sometimes will use Army slang for your MOS after they find out what it is, and they'll probably ask at some point during training.   If you're not a punk then you will start earning a bit of respect from them as the weeks go on and they see who you are and what you're made of.  By the end of training your whole platoon will be laughing while getting smoked for some bullshit reason.

 

AIT is a lot easier in some ways. You get all your shit back; phones and computers, clothes, etc whatever you brought with you when you left home.  You will have some free time in the afternoon until evening  (study, don't goof off like other idiots you will see there).  Weekends.  If you keep up physically and academically you will earn off-base privileges.  And gawd help you if you double-tap on a test (academic).  Don't fail a single test, which shouldn't be that difficult.  I was surprised by how many people in my company failed the same damn stupid test twice and became a holdover.  Holdovers get no respect from anybody unless they have an very visually obvious serious injury.

 

You don't have to pretend anything to get in.


Edited by Duchykins, 31 July 2015 - 07:52 PM.


#6 Duchykins

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Posted 31 July 2015 - 08:21 PM

I forgot to tell you about the age factor.   I was 23 when I enlisted, but even that young I was older than roughly 90% of people both in basic and AIT.  I had a huge advantage over them just because of that little bit of extra maturity and life experience.   You will too if you choose to go.  You will get noticed for it eventually.   It's not really all about how many push-ups you can do, especially when you get to AIT.


Edited by Duchykins, 31 July 2015 - 08:23 PM.


#7 nowayout

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Posted 31 July 2015 - 09:59 PM

No.


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#8 proileri

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Posted 02 August 2015 - 07:38 AM

Military has a lot of interesting jobs and opportunities, but the basic grunt roles are probably the least interesting of those. There's a ton of military jobs that have to do with technology, engineering, science, medicine etc. that you could do instead of carrying a rifle. Military isn't the worst idea, but plan ahead - research all the branches and opportunities, and think what skills and benefits you could have in your pocket when you get out 5-10 years from now.


Edited by proileri, 02 August 2015 - 07:39 AM.


#9 iseethelight

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Posted 17 September 2015 - 12:29 AM

If you hate being bossed around taking orders from others, the military is  not the best choice for you.


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#10 rwac

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Posted 17 September 2015 - 04:27 AM

This comic is about the marines but I cant imagine the rangers to be very different. Just so you know what youre getting into.

 

http://terminallance.com/



#11 Ark

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Posted 18 September 2015 - 12:26 PM

I have a dream after I finish my goals in the US, I've been considering the French Foreign Legion. You should consider this as a option on top of the things you've listed. Good luck, have fun!





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