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MXE showed me a glimpse of what my life can be

nmda quinolinic acid mxe ketamine hpa glucocorticoids excitotoxicity comt xanax depression

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#1 mandomadness

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Posted 28 August 2016 - 02:30 AM


I'll try to make this as concise as possible. I've had social anxiety for as long as I can remember and was prescribed xanax to cope with it six years ago. 6 months into treatment, I was struggling with cognitive difficulties brought on by xanax. After titrating off the drug, I experienced intense rebound anxiety. At the same time, I was riddled with psychological and physical symptoms which I believe were manifestations of increased anxiety. I had

-reoccurring tonsillitis
-cognitive degeneration
-chronic fatigue
-restless sleep and night terrors
-tinnitus
-visual snow

I was treated for tonsillitis 3-4 times in a few months with courses of antibiotics and then the subsequent removal of my tonsils. After my tonsils were removed my anxiety and physical symptoms were at an all time high. I was dealing with a lot of gut issues which I believe were brought on by a combination of hpa axis dysfunction due to stress and unhealthy microbiome due to overuse of antibiotics.

Fast forward to 1 year later (2012) and I more or less had my life in order. Eating a ketogenic diet and avoiding all forms of sugar as it seemed to be detrimental to my cognition, exercising, fixing my microbiome, and no longer struggling from crippling anxiety. Still I was having issues with anhedonia, chronic fatigue, depression, and intolerance to certain foods and alcohol. I would suffer from multiple day hangovers after a night of moderate drinking. Drinking a few beers would result in terrible brain fog and inflammation of my gut where stool would come out ribbon shaped.

(2014) I've been in a stable state for about two years now and have been taking incredible care with what I put into my body. Still I don't feel like I ever returned to my baseline before xanax. Then I used mxe recreationally for a week and it was like everything in my life was fixed. I could socialize without being constantly stuck in my mind. My visual acuity in the sun improved, tinnitus went away, and most unexplainably I could drink alcohol without feeling like shit for three days after. My dreams were vivid again and had meaning. I was waking up well rested. Alas, I was cured for four months and felt like a real person again for the first time in years. Slowly mxe lost efficacy and the incredible afterglow that I was used to having was replaced with a slight hangover. Soon I was back to square one with my gut problems and depression/anxiety. I decided to try to use memantine therapeutically, but was disappointed with the results. I took about a year off from all nmda receptor antagonists and while I don't have a tolerance to dissociative effects, I do not experience an antidepressant afterglow.

What course of action would you take if you were me? My anxiety is mostly under control due to exercise and meditation. While exercise makes me less anxious, it is paradoxically accompanied with overstimulation and cognitive issues. I have seen great results from intermittent fasting and working out fasted first thing in the morning.
Synaptogenesis- I did find short term relief by using nsi-189, but it also loses its antidepressant effect. Total sleep deprivation for one night leaves me in a hypomanic state. While I enjoy the euphoria, it's nowhere near as clear minded as my original experience with mxe and is obviously unsustainable. noopept makes me agitated.

I believe mxe cured my depression through mitigating excitotoxicity, increase in bdnf, and providing my body with a stress free environment to fix hpa function. Is there anyway to regain the therapeutic effects of nmda receptor antagonists? Should I focus my attention on hpa axis dysfunction and maybe controlling glucocorticoids and quinolinic acid? I have had my genotype sequenced and the only notable snps regarding depression are low levels of pgc-1a and low levels of comt (worrier genotype) My understanding of neurobiology is limited as is my ability to quickly extrapolate meaningful information from scientific papers. If someone could point me in the right direction, I'd be very grateful. I haven't had any luck with traditional medical advice.



#2 jack black

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Posted 28 August 2016 - 07:15 AM

The strong reaction to beer sounds like gluten sensitivity. Have you seen evidence of that in your genetic testing? 23andme makes it difficult to see. It takes a major effort to dig it out.

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#3 mandomadness

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Posted 31 August 2016 - 03:49 AM

There are a couple snp's that indicate disposition for celiac disease. The thing is I never had any problems with gluten or beer until after antibiotic treatment for tonsils. I know these diseases do develop after childhood and I should probably see a gastro. I'm currently on a ketogenic diet avoiding all forms of gluten and feel moderately good. While I initially thought small intestinal bacterial overgrowth was cause of my symptoms, mxe made me question that theory. It's just weird that mxe made beer tolerable for that short period of time. While I could easily put down 8 beers plus in highschool, 3 now would leave me feeling autistic and bedridden for multiple days.



#4 jack black

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Posted 31 August 2016 - 06:40 AM

I just replied but the post was lost. My point is i have gluten issues in US but not when traveling overseas. I suspect microbiota and antibiotics and/or chemicals laced US food make the difference. It's possible food sensitivities affect brain via excitotoxicity?

#5 gamesguru

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Posted 09 September 2016 - 06:37 AM

was the "cognitive deterioration" before or after the mxe?


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#6 mandomadness

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 04:35 PM

Mxe improved my cognition for about 3 months. Now it is acutely deleterious resulting in a foggy hangover.

#7 mandomadness

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 04:40 PM

Have you tried prebiotics/ probiotics or had your microbiome tested. My friend had a similar experience when we visited Italy. His eczema which he had from childhood completely cleared up after a couple weeks.

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#8 jack black

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 05:36 PM

Have you tried prebiotics/ probiotics or had your microbiome tested. My friend had a similar experience when we visited Italy. His eczema which he had from childhood completely cleared up after a couple weeks.

 

was it @me?

if so, i don't know how to reliably do that.

quick search shows the existing services providing useless and contradictory results: https://www.sciencen...obiome-analyzed

 

if there is a better way, i'm all ears.
 







Also tagged with one or more of these keywords: nmda, quinolinic acid, mxe, ketamine, hpa, glucocorticoids, excitotoxicity, comt, xanax, depression

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