For the last couple of years I have been on a quest to get my mental health back to where it was before a cascade of cumulative, stressful life events, coupled with my obsessive, guilty predisposition, thrust me into a pit of despair.
In Australia, the medical community tends to be quite behind in psychiatrist treatments for my somewhat atypical symptoms that are left untreated by conventional SSRI treatments. So when I was at rock bottom, with suicidal ideation slowly transitioning into intention I made a conscious choice to do whatever it takes to get myself mentally stable and productive again.
Psychological and pharmacological interventions I have since implemented, through hours, upon hours of research and trial and error has lead to significant improvement in my quality of life.
I'll spare the rest of my story and get to the reason behind my creation of this thread. I'm currently on 10mg memantine daily and low dose IR dextroamphetamine as needed which has given me substantial relief from my anhedonia, poor motivation, fatigue, inattentiveness, recurring negative thought patterns, and impulsiveness. Additionally I'm looking to add a low dose of selegiline daily to further improve upon these symptoms, since I have found Dopamine to be a primary player in my problematic pathology.
However, I still have some significant symptoms that need attention, which I attribute to insufficient Gaba activity. Mainly, social anxiety (this is very situational) and even some generalised anxiety. Serotonin supplements and drugs don't give me much relief, however benzos are very effective. I'm not interested in long-term use of Gaba based drugs that damage Gaba activity and want something that would assist me in repairing damage done.
Sometimes I get in situations where I have to speak and become overwhelmed with anxiety, so bad I'm literally shaking, I become bright red and sweaty, my airways become so restricted I can barely breath let alone talk. Am I wrong blaming Gaba deficiency for this? Could it be more to do with problems caused by norepinephrine?
I'm open to suggestions, but I want to avoid addictive drugs, or drugs that downregulate receptors